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deliciousangelfestival · 4 years ago

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Wicked Romance

Chapter 3

Character : Mob!Steve Rogers x Retired Assassin Female Reader

Summary : Steve was hoping to meet the right one until he met her. But is he ready to be with her? He thought his life already dark because of his job. He wouldn’t able to find a woman that strong enough to face the hardship to stand beside him. Turn out his life is nothing compared to her.

Warning : No smuts, since I don’t know how to write it. Peace y’all.

Today (Y/N) drive Peter to his workplace; the business still close, but Wanda wants him to come to discuss which recipe they should use for the grand re-opening.

Usually, Peter use his bike to go to work. But (Y/N) offers to use her car since she’s also going out.

Peter notices a big back on her backseat. “Where are you going?”

“My friend needs my help.”

“Hmm.” He was silent if (Y/N) mention ‘help’ means including guns, explosions, and deadly battle.

“Who’s your friend?”

(Y/N) felt nervous, she bit her lips. “John Wick…??” She answered him with questions because she knew he doesn’t like it when dealing with underworld stuff.

The atmosphere suddenly became quiet.

She felt nervous because he became quiet. “Are you mad? Don’t worry Bambi, I’ll be back before you know it.”

She glanced a bit to see his reaction wondering if he’s mad. Well, she’s right cause Peter’s head is looking out his window and he already put on his earphones. (Y/N) sighed inwardly, she couldn't help it when her former comrade asked for her help.

Their ride was silent until her car stopped at Peter's destination. From her view, she could see the restaurant almost done with the renovation. The worker put in new furniture and chandeliers.

“Have a good day Peter.” (Y/N) rests her on the steering wheels; she smiles sweetly at Peter, but he still give her a cold shoulder.

She doesn’t like it when he ignores her, so when he gets out of the car and closes the door, (Y/N) open the car window and screams, "Bye, I love you!!!"

Honestly, he didn’t play any song to his ears; he only put it on just for show because it’s too early to argue with (Y/N). How shocked he was when he heard her sudden shout.

Peter was embarrassed because there are many people in front of the store and pedestrians right now. All eyes and giggle are directed to him; he pulled down the hoodie to hide his face.

(Y/N) giggled like a maniac, she shouted again, “Peter, I won’t go until you say it back!!”

Peter huffed before turning around and ran to the car again. “Love you too, don’t get killed and don’t ruin your new carpet with blood this time.” After he said that, he ran into the building. He wishes he could dig a hole and hide right now.

(Y/N) feels satisfied after knowing he’s talking to her again. She drove the car, heading to her battleground.

When Peter stepped inside, he saw his colleague chuckled when they looked at him. He tries to act cool and walks towards Wanda table.

Peter felt a big shadow covering him; it made him stop walking. He glanced through his shoulder and saw his boss, Sam, Steve, and Bucky, looking at him with a weird smile.

“Ehm, can I help you sir?” Peter's shoulder became tense; he has never been this close with them.

Bucky put his arms around Peter’s shoulder. “Have you had breakfast Peter?”

“Yea… Waiitt….” Before Peter could finish his answer, Bucky carried his body like a potato sack.

Peter doesn’t understand why he got treated like this. They enter the private room that is only reserved for the elite patron.

Bucky drops Peter to the seat while Sam offers the kid an apple juice. Steve is standing in front of him.

“That was a nice car Peter.”

A light bulb appears in front of Peter; he could figure out what they will ask him about (Y/N).

Peter is right; three of them are curious even before they heard a woman shout towards Peter.

Why?

Because of the car.

Today (Y/N) drove using her car of the day, which is a Lamborghini Aventador.

Even the sound of the car engine made everyone turn their head to see it—no exception for Steve, Bucky, and Sam.

####

Before Peter arrived.

Steve, Bucky and Sam, are already at the restaurant to supervise the working progress. They were heading out after making sure everything was fine until they heard a loud engine sound.

How surprised they were when they saw Peter step out from the car. Steve could see it was a woman who drove the car.

“Hmm, Peter usually drove a bike here.” Said Pietro, who joined them.

“He acts like a poor kid turned out he’s rich.”

They are still looking outside, trying to see who the driver is. Lucky for them the car window rolled down.

Steve almost popped out his eyes when he saw the woman he was longing to meet is the car owner.

“Hmm is that Miss Lilly?” Pietro recognised his favourite customer. His hunch was correct all this time; Peter and she knew each other.

“Bye, I love you!!!”

The adult male gasped when they heard her shout towards Peter.

“Oh my god, Peter is a sugar baby and Miss Lily is his sugar mama.” Pietro gasped.

Steve knocked the bartender's head lightly. “Go help your sister.” Pietro rolled his eyes and left to help Wanda.

Bucky looked at Steve, who had a jealous expression on his face. “Ask the kid.” He knew his friend had been looking for the mysterious girl for weeks, but they found nothing. It turns out the one who gives them the information is here.

“Thank you, it belongs to my sister.”

How relieved Steve was when the word ‘sister’ came out of Peter's mouth.

"You never mention you have older siblings. "

"Step sibling actually."

"Hmm."

"So her name is Lily Parker?" Bucky opened his notebook and put her name in the database. He thought they could find something, but they didn't.

Peter raised his eyebrow.

"Come on Peter, you know what we do. Our boss here is interested in your older sister."

“We didn’t share a last name. Her name is Lily Belcher.”

Bucky immediately types the last name. He smiled after they finally found what they’re looking “Steve, come and take a look at this.”

Steve looks at the screen; he could see her occupation as Special Project Analyst, skills in archery, karate, and Muay Thai.

“In which industries she’s working?” Steve asked Peter.

“Automotive.”

Steve can’t be fooled; this is must be fake info of her. There’s no way an analyst hide a dagger under her dress. There’s a lot of question in his head right now, but he needs to wait until everything is ready.

Peter and others are having lunch together until Vision turn up the TV volume. Usually, they let it on without any voice. But today, breaking news is different because they could see a camera moving and show Brock and his lackey are asleep on the plane runway.

“Today in the middle of the city, there’s a guy riding a horse and shooting a certain group and some witnesses said a female helping him. Then a private jet that belongs to Mr Rumlow got stolen by them. The culprit put the passenger to sleep as you can see.”

The big bosses are laughing out loud in the office; they could hear it from outside.

“Hahaha, who is this guy? Who ever did this to Brock, I owe him a drink.” Bucky has the loudest laugh.

While they were laughing, Peter almost choked to death. He was drinking water when he heard the news—only one brave enough to steal in daylight.

#####

Inside the stolen private jet, a woman treats a wounded male with blood everywhere on his body.

“Does it really necessary to steal from him? There’s a lot of empy jet that we could use.” John Wick is lying on the small couch while closing his eyes because (Y/N) stitching his open injury.

(Y/N) answer while trying to finish her job. “That guys annoyed me, because of him my tea time got ruined.”

John chuckled, hearing her childish reason. “Remind me not to get on your bad side (Y/N).”

Another day,

Another challenge.

Finally, Steve business re-opened again. He and his friends are welcoming their guest together. But secretly, he’s nervous, thinking if she will come or not. He kept dreaming about her.

“Punk, your girl is here.” Bucky alerts his friend.

Steve turns his head to the entrance. He became dumbfounded at one moment when he saw her step into the building. She was beautiful, and when not smiling, she looked more dazzling, her presence hypnotising her spectators.

“Great party Rogers.” (Y/N) compliment the host party while handed him liquor as a gift.

Steve was surprised when she gave him a gift. “You don’t have too.” He prepared to decline in the polite matter, but Pietro grabs the bottle.

“The Dalmore 62??!!” He almost screamed when he saw the label. Because of his job, he knew a lot of expensive liquor. The one he’s holding is costly. Even with his salary, there’s no way he could buy this drink.

“Thank you Miss Lily.” Pietro looks at Steve with a big smile. “I’ll put this into your collection boss.”

Steve rolled his eyes to his childish bartender, he felt annoyed, but he became less tense when he heard her giggle. He ordered a drink from Pietro assistant for both of them.

The beautiful couple talks like it’s only them who inside the room.

"Lily Belcher is not your real name right?" Steve twirl the whiskey glass in his hand.

"Maybe, why do you think that?"

"Can I know your real name?"

"What are you gonna do about it?"

Steve smirked; he lowered his head to get closer to her ear and whispered something that made her giggle.

"That sounds fun."

"How about a bet? If you win I will tell you my real name."

"But if you win?"

"I'll get free food everytime I come here."

Steve chuckled, then he let out a big laugh. He never thought a girl like her would ask this from him. Somewhat refreshing actually; well, he won't mind if he lost because he could see her every time she came here.

"Deal."

Steve hug her waist intimately. "What exactly is the challenge?"

"How many spies we could find in your party."

Steve looked at her face with a big question mark.

(Y/N) rolled her eyes and act playfully in front of him. "Ah, come on Steve I know this grand party also a silent announcement that this place is neutral. Like where the law enforcement and mobsters could enjoy their drink and food together."

Steve was impressed with her judgment.

"My guts tell me you already figure who it is."

She tapped her lips"Yeah, not the police cause they don't want to deal with mobster. My guess is…" She whispers to him, "C.I.A."

Steve gripped his wine glass; he felt annoyed he got an uninvited guest tonight.

"They won't target you tonight. I assure that."

"I fell safe already cause an angel like you guarding me." Steve responded.

(Y/N) laugh bitterly that's what man calls her like love, baby, and another sweet nickname, but after they break up, she gets called bitch, or satan.

"Who could figure who the spies the most won."

"Deal."

(Y/n) is walking away from Steve, but he holds her waist. "Let's do it together." Since he doesn't want to let her wander around, other males will try to flirt with her. Nope, not on his watch.

“I forgot to tell you, there’s a time limit.” (Y/N) move away from his embrace; she taps her watch. “We have 30 minutes. Time is ticking Rogers.”

Steve’s hand felt empty when she stepped away, but he more determined to finish their bet. "Okay."

####

Bucky, Sam, are looking at Steve, who acts like a lovesick puppy. They could tolerate Steve for leaving them to attend to their guest. Since the main reason for today party is to impress her. It seems like the plan is a success. Steve and she are inseparable.

Sarah and Joseph Rogers enter the party together. Usually, Steve would welcome them immediately, but they didn’t see a glimpse of their son.

Sarah approach her son best friend to ask, “Where’s Steve?”

Bucky smiled at her. “He’s with a special guest tonight.”

Joseph smirked since he understands what Bucky just said: “I would like to meet her.”

(Y/N) use her skill to seduce the spies; most of them were unprepared for a beautiful lady like her to approach them. They are here to get information. Her method was quiet; she put sleeping pills into their drinks. One by one, the spies excuse themselves to the bathroom to wash their face. That’s where (Y/N) knocked them down.

While Steve uses his status as the host party. He is a proper host; he gave a warm welcome to the spies. The spies knew they are done. They want to refute, but they are already in the wrong since they fake the invitation. Steve is considerate and doesn’t want to make a scene asking them to go back to their car.

When Steve walks behind the spies, he sees her already standing leaning to the car.

“20 minutes, not bad. How many that you found?”

“Three.” Her finger pointed to the three male who fell asleep.

Steve smirked. “Four.”

“No way.”

“Look like I won.”

(Y/N) clicked her tongue. “How?”

“I have the upper hand from the beginning since I’m the owner. I knew who the guests were and the people who work under me.”

“Ah, I haven’t checked the kitchen. My dress-code won’t allow me to enter.”

Steve nodded. “There’s one waiter who I've never seen before, he works alongside Pietro, your favourite bartender.”

The spies felt like a light bulb for the couple; they excuse themselves quietly by dragging their team, who fell asleep, back into their car and drive away. They bet the couple doesn’t notice nor seem to care about their presence. It’s uncomfortable watching the mob boss flirting.

They were right; the couple doesn’t care at all. They went back to the building where Steve takes her to the terrace; he already arranged it to be beautiful; he requests to make the light illuminate the flower perfectly.

“So my mysterious guest would you tell me your name?”

Under the light, Steve saw her beautiful smile “(Y/N) Parker. I’m pretty sure you already know about me and Peter.”

Steve nodded. “He’s lucky to have a beautiful sister like you and your name sounds perfect to my ear.”

He put his arm around her waist and leaned his head near her ear. She could feel his breath kinda tickle her neck. “(Y/N), what kind of reward will you give me since I successfully redecorated this place and won the bet today?”

She always likes a straightforward person like Steve. She doesn’t mind his aggressive touch. This time it (Y/N) turns to whisper in his ear. What she said almost made Steve’s leg become jelly. If he didn’t maintain his self-esteem, he would lose at this moment.

“Oh, I’m sorry I thought this place is empty.” A guest interrupted.

Steve sighed; another one tries to disturb their private moment. He asked her if she wants to come to his house, to which she immediately agreed.

“Not saying goodbye to your brother?”

(Y/N) doesn’t worried about Peter since she taught him lethal self-defence. There’s a lot of sharp weapons if someone tries to hurt him. “He’s fine.”

Both of them get into the car; Steve drives back to his place.

When they headed to their destination, they got attacked again. (Y/N) and Steve’s make-out session got disturbed.

‘BANG’

Both of them knew it’s a bullet that hit Steve’s car. He already prepared for this kind of attack, all of his car already modified with bulletproof.

Guess who? Brock, he’s made a fuss since he didn’t get the invitation.

Steve felt guilty looking at his date, but his worries are all gone when he saw her look excited.

“Keep driving.”

“What?”

(Y/N) hand move to touch Steve blazer that made him shocked because of her hand touching his abs.

“(Y/N) now is not the time.” Steve hold his breath.

(Y/N) she laughed because Steve seemed misunderstood; she didn’t say anything that made him more frustrated. If the situation is different, he wouldn’t mind.

Her finger found Steve’s gun that attached to his belt. “I’m going to borrow this for a moment.”

“That’s dangerous, let’s stop here.”

Before he stops the car, (Y/N) opens the window; her body still stays on the seat; she puts out her right that holds the gun. She saw her target through the car window.

“Drive to the left a little bit Steve.”

“What?”

“Now.”

Steve does as she told. It gave her a clear shot at Brock's car.

‘BOOM.’

Steve gasped, his head kept turning back, looking at the scene; with just one shot Brock’s car tire got shot that made them lose control and hit the concrete barrier.

He finally able to stop his car. “That was a big crash.”

(Y/N) felt proud with just one bullet, she able to ruin the car chase. “If they die, that’s on them.”

“You’re amazing.” Steve grabbed her cheeks and brought her head closer to him so he could kiss her. It’s been a long time since he gets excited like this.

‘I never met a woman like you.’

They only been together for hours but Steve already felt the connection. And tonight even though there’s a lot of distraction, he could be himself when she stay beside him.

He hope she would be the last one.

So they drive back to his place and do the deeds.

(BANG! BANG! BANG!)

While the couple is enjoying their intimate moment, the atmosphere quite different in C.I.A HQ.

‘THUD’ The sound of a pile of document being smashed to the table made the people who stand fidget a bit. They put their head down since they too scared looking at their boss.

“DAMN IT!!!”

“It was perfect, but all of you failed the mission. How?”

The person who just punched the table and screamed at her subordinate is Peggy Carter, also Steve ex-girlfriend. They were together in the military, but they broke up after Steve decided to work with his father.

She is pissed that her plan to get her people to be the informant for the mob, using the party tonight, has failed.

C.I.A has trying to get dirt from Steve group; they even use Peggy to fool Steve since they had a history together. Peggy uses this mission to make Steve quit being a mobster boss, but it’s such a difficult task to change his mind. Her mission was failed when Natasha found out.

Peggy knew she’s finished when Natasha confronted her.

Her betrayal hurt Steve, and he banned her from stepping into his territory.

“Who found you?”

“The big boss.”

“Argh, that even worse.”

“And there’s one more that is helping him. She’s the one who put the other three to sleep.”

“She?” Peggy raised her eyebrows.

“Yeah and a pretty one. This is the first time we've seen her with Rogers.”

“Have you found out who it is?”

“We use facial recognition, her name is Lilly Belcher.” One of the agents gives her a document.

She read the file “She looks innocent to be with Steve.”

‘and beautiful’

Peggy clenched her fist when she looked at the photo. The break-up left bitterness in her heart. From the story, she heard from her agents, seems like this woman is strong and doesn't mind playing along with Steve. The totally opposite of their relationship.

'Perhaps he found his right partner.'

Peggy doesn't like that idea “I won’t let you have a happy ending Steve.”

>>>CHAPTER 4 IS HERE.

A/N: uUHH... Steve has a bitter ex.

Please tell me if you want to be tagged for the next chapter:

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#mob!steve rogers x reader #mob!steve #peter parker #cs4kwritingchallenge #marvel au #steve rogers x you #steve rogers #steve rogers x y/n

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renwritesrandomthings · 5 years ago

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イケメン戦国：戦国おとぎ話～秀吉ルート

A close daimyo friend of Hideyoshi, named Shibata-dono is celebrating his 60th birthday. (I am not so sure if this is a reference to Shibata Katsuei~ because Shibata and Toyotomi weren’t really the best buddies.) MC volunteers to help out in the preparations and sew a chanchanko or a sleeveless Haori. Hideyoshi explains that reaching that age is amazing, since it is quite a rare thing in the Muromachi Period. I am guessing because of war or diseases without cure.

The color red relating to its Chinese roots is a lucky color for good luck, long life. The practice of sleeveless haori is usually given to a child, but as a point of reaching 60 years of age it means to a symbol of rebirth for more years to come.

This somehow reminded MC how different lher life in the present is. She tells Hideyoshi that people even reach 100 years. Hideyoshi said, it’s really a peaceful time. Among all the main routes, I think Hideyoshi’s route is the most reflective of how it is easy to die in those times. If you have read his main route, his route borrows the historical Toyotomi’s death poem about life and death. And, MC has accepted the fact that Hideyoshi will always be in war and may die fighting for Nobunaga. So, hearing how Hideyoshi reacts surprised about living long reminded her of that. Hideyoshi notices the gloom on her face and asks immediately why. MC denies her worries.

I seriously love Hideyoshi’s MC. While Hideyoshi loves to spoil her a lot, she always attempts keep a logical reaction and her attempt to be strong.

MC diverts the topic and shares the story of ‘Little Red Riding Hood’, relating to the chanchanko. As MC progresses in the story and tells Hideyoshi how little red riding hood was sent out to the woods alone.

This bothered Hideyoshi. HAHAHA So cute

“ He sat me on his lap and locked me in his arms.”

“Why let someone go alone wihen you already know there’s a wolf lurking, in the first place.”

“There’s no enough reason to go through such danger.”

And, he says, he won’t let MC be in such situation. MC laughed saying it’s just a story. Still, Hideyoshi pushes and say he won’t let her in that position.

(AH, THIS REMINDS ME OF THAT SERIOUSLY DRAMATIC YET ANNOYING SCENE IN MITSUHIDE’S ROUTE.)

Days after, Hideyoshi tells MC that Shibata-san has sent a note that he is sick and won’t be able to prepare for the party. Somehow both of them shared the same idea of going there. Hideyoshi accepted MC’s offer to join him, since he would really love to introduce her to Shibata-san. The two depart from Azuchi the next day. Upon entering a town before Shibata’s territories, Hideyoshi offered MC to rest for a while.

As they were walking, one of the townsfolk asked if they were crossing the forest. Then, they were warned about the rumoured bandits called Wolves. Hideyoshi decided to just go back Azuchi for safetly and report about the bandits. However, MC said that the forest path is quite short and it would be a waste if they don’t give Shibata his birthday wishes on the day itself. Despite having qualms, Hideyoshi listens to MC, but assures her that he’s there to protect her.

Entering the forest, the two heard a scream. Hideyoshi tells MC to hold tight as he races towards the voices. Hideyoshi sees an elderly woman and a young girl and jumps in fronr of the bandits. Of course, this aggitates the bandits. Hideyoshi smiles to MC and tells her to stay on the horse. Then, jumps off to face the bandits. He tells them to leave their weapons and runaway, since he has no plans of attacking them.

He confronts them with the fact that they may survive today, but what about tomorrow—referring back to his own experience. One bandit attempts to attack, but Hideyoshi counters it without much effort. Realizing their opponent, the bandids did follow his suggestion, left the weapons, and left.

MC notices this and echoes Hideyohi’s thoughts within her, hoping they’d find hope like him. But, Hideyoshi says he now lives more because he wants to be with her (as he promised in his main route) .

This makes MC happy that..

“I reached out to him and gave him a kiss.”

The suddent kiss painted a shock expression on Hideyoshi-san’s face made me smile.

“Let’s live a long life, together.”

Hideyoshi recovers from her sweet action and smiles back reassuring her. Then, kisses her back, sealing the promise.

Upon reacing Shibata’s residence, the two presented their gift and birthday wishes. Then, finally retires on the room prepared for them. Turns out, the bandits have been causing a problem in Shibata’s estate and this somehow helped them deal with the issue.

The name, “Wolves” does connotes to the danger they bring, as explained by Shibata. MC tells Hideyoshi that 500 years ahead, the same meaning is shared and there’s even a song, “Men Are Wolves.”

Hideyoshi begins to tease MC saying, maybe men are indeed wolves. Then, pushes it further by asking, “So, am I a wolf as well?”

This makes MC blush and replies,” Sometimes, I think you are.”

“And, when is it?”, he asks.

“Stop that teasing question.”

“I am not teasing you. I want to know. I don’t want to scare you. So, please tell me.”

(He’s so unfair.)

“When… you kiss me.”

“When, I kiss you.. Then, I’ll kiss you so gently, you won’t think I’m a wolf.”

Hideyoshi closes the space between them, kissing her sweetly and gently. As he ends the kiss, MC responds. “it’s gentle.”

But, she wants more and can’t mutter anyword and just looks at Hideyoshi.

Hideyoshi then asks, if they can do more thatn that.

Premium Ending

Hideyoshi tells her that he is thankful for her being in his life and promises to keep his promise to cherish his life more and more. (Ugh, Hideyoshi *hugs*)

The way he kisses and touches me is too gentle, it melts my mind and my body. As our lips slowly separate from the kiss, his heated gaze is towards me. ’I promise.” ,as I reply, Hideyoshi-san’s smile left his lips as he moves to my neck. I let out a moan as he sucked the base of my neck. The sound of our kisses and rustling of clothes reverberate in the room, as my skin is slowly being exposed by his pulling of the obi. I suddenly covered my chest, realizing my embarrassment from getting seen.

“ Don’t cover it, let me see them properly.”

To not completely escape, he stimulates the place I tried to conceal with his lips. My hands lost it’s ability to avoid it, as his sweet kiss trailed down on my body. “Hideyoshi-sa…n” “I can’t be any gentler anymore. I just said I don;t want you to think I’m like those men. But, touching you this way.. I won’t be able to stop myself…Are you scared?” Hideyoshi-san asks as he touches me, his fingers softly…

“I am not afraid, just a little embarrassed If it’s you, I am not afraid if you show that wolf side..I want more of you. I love all of you.”

After a month, Hideyoshi visits MC’s room, while she does her own seamstress work. Hideyoshi enters somewhat giddier than usual. He holds a scroll from Shibata. Hideyoshi sits beside her and unrolls the scroll. It’s a painting of Shibata and his family with the sleeveless haori MC made. MC points at the painting of Shibata’s wife saying how she looks happy. Hideyoshi echoes this by saying, the two get along really well during their visit. Part of the painting is the girl they saved in the forest. Turns out she’s one of Shibata’s grandchild. By the end of the scroll is a note saying “ thank you for the both of them.

MC tells Hideyoshi that they should have the same painting one day, surrounded by their children. Hideyoshi responds by saying, “Shall we make a big family one day, then?” The two laugh at the hopeful future they dreamed of, as they exchange kisses not realizing who initiated it. [END] Such a nice alternative story for Hideyoshi, when historically he only had one child and left no other decendants.

#ikemen sengoku #ikesen #ikesen hideyoshi #toyotomi hideyoshi #ikesen jp #renwritessummaries #renwritestranslations

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onewfantaesy · 7 years ago

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Kibum as 2min's baby is the cutest thing ever. Can you write more, maybe him as a toddler? And 2min probably going crazy with him (or possibly Minho teaming up with baby Kibum to drive Taemin crazy, hahaha). Thank you, I love your au's!!

When Taemin and Minho first talked about having a baby, Minho always said he was going to retire from his soccer career the moment they had a child together. That one promise was what allowed Taemin to finally cave and actually take the baby talk Minho kept bringing up seriously. “We could adopt,” Minho said, “or maybe we can have a surrogate or something. Let’s have a baby, babe.”

Taemin really counted on Minho retiring for this whole baby thing to work.

But now, a surrogate, one baby, and two years later, Minho still hadn’t retired from his soccer career, and Taemin was running ragged.

“Please just put them on, baby,” Taemin begged, trying to wrestle Kibum into a pair of pants.

“No,” Kibum said, a giggle leaving his mouth as he ripped himself away from Taemin and ran out of the room. “Want Papa!”

Taemin fell onto the toddler’s bed and buried his face in one of the stuffed animals. This was getting to be too much for him, and even all the help his parents and brother were giving him wasn’t helping him much.

Minho was out of town for a game. Again.

Kibum missed him. Again.

Taemin was ready to lock Kibum in his bedroom and drink himself into a stupor. Again.

Except Taemin had rehearsals and a show tonight, and he needed to be out of the house ten minutes ago to get Kibum to his brother’s house and make it to the theater on time.

He told Minho again and again that quitting his dancing career wasn’t an option. There wasn’t a whole lot Taemin could do for a decent amount of money in this industry, and he was one of the principal dancer in this company. He couldn’t quit now. But Minho was well within the retiring age for a soccer player - he’d been doing this for years - and he could easily become a couch, or a game announcer, or something. Minho had a big name in the sports industry, he could do whatever he wanted.

Besides, Minho readily agreed to quit before the baby actually came along. Now, with Kibum two years old and getting more and more opinionated every day, it was starting to become a problem that Minho wasn’t home a whole lot.

“Do you want to go to Uncle Jinki’s without your pants on? Because if you don’t come put your clothes on right now, that’s how we’re leaving, Kibum,” Taemin called out, hurrying out of Kibum’s room and into the living room.

“Fine!”

Taemin took a deep breath, shoved the pair of pants into the bag he packed for Kibum to have at Jinki’s and went to wrangle the toddler into the car.

“Fine, we’re leaving,” Taemin said, pulling Kibum into his arms.

Kibum screamed and yelled and kicked his little legs all the way out to the car, and he cried and screamed the whole car ride to Jinki’s house. Today was not a good day.

When Taemin dropped Kibum off at Jinki’s, he pulled Kibum close to him to give him a kiss and hug him.

“Daddy loves you,” Taemin said, kissing Kibum’s cheek. “I won’t be able to come pick you up until you’re fast asleep, so be good for Uncle Jinki and Auntie Luna, okay?”

“Don’t leave,” Kibum whined, hooking his arms around Taemin’s neck and crying.

“Daddy will be back, baby,” Taemin whispered. “But I have to go now. Be a good boy.”

Jinki had to pry Kibum off of Taemin, and it broke Taemin’s heart to hear his son crying so hard as he was leaving.

After a whole night of performances, Taemin walked back into his house with Kibum sleeping heavily in his arms. Taemin was just thankful Jinki and Luna managed to get Kibum into his pajamas.

He walked into his bedroom and put Kibum in the middle of the bed before changing his clothes and getting in the bed with him. Kibum always slept in his bed when Minho wasn’t home. It made him feel better.

The next morning, Taemin was standing at the stove with Kibum held at his hip. Kibum had his thumb in his mouth, his eyes were barely open, and he was drooling all over Taemin’s shoulder. Taemin just rocked him back and forth while he cooked the scrambled eggs they were going to have for breakfast.

That was pretty much how their entire day went. Kibum clung to Taemin while Taemin just held him close and rubbed his back. Kibum was always clingy when he had to fall asleep before Taemin could pick him up.

“Daddy has another performance tonight, baby,” Taemin said softly, smoothing down Kibum’s hair.

“No.”

“Yes,” Taemin said, kissing his head. “But it’s earlier today, so Daddy will come get you before you have to go to sleep.”

“Want Daddy to stay home,” Kibum whined.

“I know, baby, I know,” Taemin cooed, rocking Kibum back and forth.

Kibum cried when Taemin dropped him off again. Taemin gripped the steering wheel tight as he drove to the theater, trying not to cry himself. This was really getting to be too much for him.

Minho was back home the next week, but Kibum would barely acknowledge him.

“He’s upset,” Taemin told him. “You were gone for a long time.”

“It was a tournament, babe, it happens,” Minho said. “Why are you both so upset?”

“Because you were gone for two weeks!” Taemin said. “I feel like a single parent half the time, Minho, I can’t keep doing this.”

“Taemin-”

“You said you were going to stop being a player when we had a baby. Well newsflash, the baby is two years old now. You haven’t stopped,” Taemin said. “One day, you’re gonna come home and Kibum won’t know who you are.”

Taemin didn’t even look at Minho before he went to go find where Kibum had run off to.

A month later, Minho announced that he was going to retire from playing at the end of the season.

“You and Kibum are more important to me than playing,” Minho whispered one night while Kibum slept in the bed between the two of them.

“Thank you,” Taemin whispered back.

#taemin #minho #shinee #2min #key #hello anon #bow au #so this is more angsty than anything but well whatever lmao

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wearethegladiators · 5 years ago

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WHERE ARE THEY NOW? RACHEL EDITION

fc: leighton meester

age: 27 (it’s been very confusing because she’s sometimes born in 1991, sometimes in 1993. I think we made her older so that she could legally inherit from the DCH so let’s make her 27 - or about to be. I see her as more of a end of the year/winter child tbh.)

job: head of dch bitch

(long post ahead buckle up kids)

Backstory-wise

Rachel’s back-story is a good 99% inspired by shitty téléfilms but I wouldn’t change most of it, she’s had it and that really defines who she is as a person. (I mean, she definitely did not have a split personality disorder wth? I watched too much Heroes for sure. She may be struggling with an Intermittent Explosive Personality Disorder though, like Liam in TW). The plane crash thingy may be a bit too much, but... I mean, Rachel IS the final girl. I’m used to playing survivor but l’essence même de Rachel c’est d’être une survivante. Ah si, aussi, her father is now called Louis Seymour and no longer Lewis Seyfried (wth did all our characters had such American names???? Lewis’s French, goddamn it). Oh and we’re gonna be talking disability as well.

I couldn’t find her comprehensive back-story so let’s just go with the flow. Aurélia and Louis definitely were not married, they probably did not even have a stable relationship (I mean how could you have a stable relationship with Aurélia). But I can see them dating for a while, Louis may have been touring in the U.S. to show his work and skills, anyway. I don’t think Aurelia ever told him about her pregnancy which DRAMATICALLY parallels Tyler and Rachel’s story (actually I pretty much think she did not tell anyone…). Or maybe she did, years later. Or when she left Rachel at an orphanage somewhere in Canada. So yeah Rachel was abandoned aged 1 J She mostly grew up in that structure, but she had behavioral/anger issues and she was bullied by other kids/did not stay for long with her foster families. So Rachel, a SURVIVOR, ultimately freaking ran away from that orphanage (probably around 10-ish years old) and pretty much… lived in the streets for a while, and walked a lot (boi she’s got so much in common with Lukas yo). She was ultimately found by a family which put an “ad” in the local newspapers and that’s how her maternal grandmother found her. For some reason the maternal grandmother decided not to keep her (she stayed max 1 year with her) and to send her back to her father in France (either in the South or in Normandy). Then they took the plane, let’s say they had no crash and Rachel found her dad and she lived at his place until she was 14 years old (when he was killed by Z) and she was very happy about it. That’s pretty much where she learnt how to ride because bah mdr she probably had never done so before, or only in colo or shit like that; she also learnt at least “French” French (she potentially knew Québecois). I don’t think she ever was a jockey though or that Z and GG shot her horse during a race MDRRR (remember it’s 2019 we have plotlines now). But her father was still killed by Z and euh well… she ended up once again with no parental figure and was supposed to be brought back to foster care/an orphanage, which was not very cool, so guess what? SHE RAN AWAY BITCH. I can see her hitchhiking and pretty much stealing stuff and maybe hanging out with weird people in some squats (but NEVER doing drugs that’s so not Rachel), and ultimately she ended up in Paris where she thought she could “disappear”, maybe find a job or something – anyway, opportunities. She probably had a fake ID that said she was 18 and maybe she was even able to buy a car (but just to sleep in it mdr) (or to drive illegally, I mean, yeah). And I guess one day she found the DCH and asked John and Elodie if she could work there for some money and they took her in and now she’s a star!!

Also there was an interesting aspect to Rachel when I first started playing her (a while, while ago): she had that big accident while riding a horse and was pretty much left disabled by it and did not ride for years until boom, DOOMER bitch. I don’t think she would have been able to survive the way she did with a disability but I kind of like this storyline so I guess maybe she had this “accident” with no big consequences but she was heavily traumatized by it (her horse may still have died in it but that would seriously echo Cassey’s story – I mean that happens but still). So she probably did not ride for a while after that, yeah.

Started from palefrenière ended up CEO BITCH

Professionally

Well I mean, Rachel’s pretty much at the top of her career… I think she’s pretty big now, people are starting to respect her in the business. It was quite hard being in charge at 18 because no one would take her seriously but she’s proven repeatedly that she’s to be counted with by now. There are probably people coming to the DCH just to learn about their methods. Maybe they are little girls looking up to her. She’s definitely holding Ted-Talk-like conferences btw. Maybe she had her own Ted Ex?

She made the DCH much bigger, they probably have more horses now and they DO have an administrative/business/executive team, YEAH. She also definitely worked on the “social”/”horses heal” aspect, probably extending the procedure Tyler benefited from, maybe opening up séances once or twice a week for people in rehab or neuroatypical people, because that’s the crap she does – Rachel cares, yo.

She went back to class! Remember Rachel never got the Bac because she was fired from high-school mdr? She went back and got it, probably around 2013-2014, Sarah Manning style. And then she did a BTS in accounting to take care of the financial aspect of the DCH (because Jake’s great, and everyone’s great in the new team, but everything Rachel does is obviously greater). I think she even got a Bachelor degree in Management by now! MY GIRLLLL

She stopped her career as a jockey as soon as she found out she was pregnant. Doomer had another jockey for some races but stopped winning mdr so he’s now retired. None of them are running anymore, it was a once-in-a-lifetime thingy. <3

Rachel’s popular but she doesn’t get to play it all funny like Jade and Lucie do. She’s the business women. She has to negotiate and go hard. So she’s definitely not as liked as the jockeys are, and she’s definitely not as famous as they are but she SO strives to be, she’s definitely doing ads for yoghurts and shit yup. She does not get to travel as much as they do either, but… She likes it. Being in charge. And she’s good at it. She’s a workaholic, a girl boss, a fashion icon.

Tries to care on her time to teach stuff but she’s soooo busy. Mais c’est elle qui supervise toutes les formations et tous les programmes et personne a rien à dire hihihi

Personally

Well, she had a baby… I don’t think 1) this came as a big surprise (she definitely was not on the pill and I don’t know but I can’t picture Tyler and Rachel as extremely careful people smh) and 2) she even questioned keeping it. Like she was already pretty much the mother of Chelsea (who was a baby!!) and Mike, but having a baby of her own is like a totally different thing. Rachel is a survivor first and foremost but she’s also… such a mother??? So nurturing and stuff. Like she never really had a parental figure (or never for more than 3 motherfucking years) and yet I think she was super good at taking care of the Howkins children?? She also had experience as a “single parent”, and she felt she NEEDED that baby to recover (especially if Tyler was presumably dead). So yeah, of course she kept it. She probably learnt about it WEEKS before telling the team btw, just to act surprised and be like “omg, maybe this a bit too late……..” mdr I love her

Honestly even if Tyler isn’t dead I don’t think she would have told him. And see that’s the big difference between Rachel and Cass: she doesn’t run after people. If they leave, they leave. If they drown, they drown. It’s all about survival and she’s not letting anyone take her down, not even her first love. So no, she wouldn’t tell him. And she wouldn’t ask him anything ofc. So yeah mdr, ambiance when he comes back after 2 years hahahaha

Also I think she’s raising a very good, very woke kid. Which is surprising because Rachel is very tolerant but you know, she’s also very closeted, she’s very traditional in some ways, definitely the less likely to vote on the left side… It’d be interesting btw if the kid (who has a cute name like Timothy/Timothée/Titouan) ends up “different” in some way, I don’t know, neuroatypical, autistic, or just gay?? I mean I don’t know but that would be interesting for her character

Also mdr poor kid must be a bit confused about his parents. Josh was there pretty much all the time to help take care of him for the first 2-3 years of his life and maybe he even moved in at some point, for some time. If Tyler never came back the kid would legit have thought that Josh was his dad hahaha

And I mean Rachel’s a sentimental bitch, she’s into long relationships and she’s very committed and… if Tyler comes back there will always be an attraction and an attachment and they’re definitely still hooking up once in a while… which must be very weird for the kid… because Rachel is sometimes also hooking up with Josh… I mean… (Josh/Rach are pretty endgame I’m sorry but they’re… it’s complicated) (gosh Josh is the Rachel’s Jake mdrrrr)

I think btw Rachel has been in a long-term relationship (like at least a good year) with some guy outside of the DCH and they broke up because…… she cheated on him with Josh, or Ty, or both, maybe for some time mdr. WHAT A MESS I SWEAR my girl just dreamt of being married having kids and living in a little nice farm but I guess dysfunctional people just work… dysfunctional…

Oh I think she REALLY likes Lukas btw. They’re even more similar than Dan/Rachel and that’s a good way of actually appreciating Daniel… without actually appreciating Daniel. Wouldn’t be surprised if they had hooked up too (nothing is okay dans ces écuries), but yeah, probs a good friend, plus she misses one since Jake left (the fact that he helped with the administrative shite?? probably made them even closer tbh, what a good guy)

She really cares about Daniel too, tbh. She definitely can see some pieces of herself in him and… well she doesn’t like that, but still. Actually I think if he was the one to run away she may have run after him… to kick his ass, BUT STILL. Maybe she’s the one taking him to the meetings when Cassey can’t?? :’) I also like to think their relationship has matured – but in a Dan/Rach way. They can tolerate each other but yeah, every freaking meal they yell at each other at some point, but talk in a very normal/casual way two minutes right after. Everyone’s shook but that’s ok for them. They’re kids basically. I like them.

I don’t think she’s so close to Bella anymore… Like I said Rach is really not the type to cling onto relationships, if people live far away she’s not gonna make efforts. She doesn’t have time anyway. Still likes her a lot, still would be freaking happy if she came visiting

Jake and Rach are very good friends; Jade and Lucie are like her two big sisters who have literally seen her grow up from her 15 year-old self to her 27-year-old GOSH I’M EMO. One of them definitely is the godmother of her son, maybe both. Jake’s the godfather. Omg family meetings must be so chaotic

I think she really likes Emeline, too, she was kind of a vent de fraîcheur and she appreciates her for that

ADAM. THIS GODDAMN ASSHOLE. Well Adam’s blood. And he’s the only family she’s got (left). So it’s ride or die bitch. I mean Rachel always had a very grayish moral code… so it’s not a big surprise she stuck with her brother whatever shit he did. Definitely kicked his ass every step of the way but… she stayed. Always. Which is surprising for Rachel, but Adam is actual family and I think she really cares about that cause god she never had a family. They’re still in touch. I can see them going in holidays two weeks a year and doing absolute bullshit that could get them in serious trouble. Yeah. She really cares. (I mean, she’s the one he called when he crashed a freaking police car so i hope he cares, too.)

SHE SAW AURELIA. FINALLY. I mean it obviously did not go well, she probably tried to strangle her at some point or something like that but… she did it. Probably when she was pregnant for drama purposes. And they’ve seen each other for a few times, ever since. Maybe Aurélia has even come to the DCH. But Rachel absolutely refuses that she builds a bond with her son. There’s a lot of drama, and Aurélia’s often on the road, but… they’re trying to make things right with their problematic personalities. I honestly think Rachel picked a lot on Aurelia’s side.

Btw, Rachel’s really a family girl and I think she stalked the fuck out of her family whenever she could. So she probably knew that Aurelia had a son and that’s probably how she found out that Adam was her brother. And Aurelia… she definitely freaking stalked her daughter, too.

Hm, what else… I hope Fuadegh is still alright I loved that horse!!!! I hope he has a baby and that baby’s Rachel’s baby. Did that make sense

Yeah the DCH definitely has sort of “farm aisle” where the public does not go. It’s basically la garderie for all the kids mdr

I like to believe the Howkins kids turned out well. I mean maybe Mike had to process more trauma than Chelsea who really was a baby when things were bad. Maybe it’s resurfacing and he’s being a bit difficult at the time. I can see him very close to Josh. We stan Josh, all the kids do.

OH YEAH BIG THING. You know how Rachel has loads of anger issues and stuff… Well she calmed down somehow, but because she had no choice. She got into a very heavy dispute with some other director/jockey/breeder/whatever, a pretty influential one. And she started threatening him – Rachel style. Le mec a ensuite porté plainte et ça a déclenché une perquisition au Domaine où la police a effectivement découvert que Rachel, that bitch, possédait plusieurs armes de manière totalement illégale hihihi. Elle a été condamnée, petit scandale, une assistante sociale est venue plusieurs fois au Domaine, on a menacé de mettre le DCH sous tutelle et tout c’était la cata. Donc elle s’est un peu calmée. Je pense aussi que Mike/son fils aurait pu avoir des problèmes d’agressivité à l’école, qu’elle se serait dit que ça pouvait venir d’elle, et que du coup elle ESSAYAIT, vraiment, d’être un peu une bombe humaine. (Puis il y a sûrement pas mal de plaintes contre elle, ne serait-ce que venant de Kevin, pour aggravated assault, donc elle a VRAIMENT intérêt à se calmer).

Random

She dyed her hair blond at some point. Everyone was like “Rachel no”, she was like “Rachel yes”, she did it, it did not turn so bad.

She still lives in her teenage bedroom!!! Elle a sûrement fait des putains de travaux sur la façade pour étendre un peu le truc pour quand elle devait dormir avec son bébé mais elle a jamais voulu de cette punaise de chambre. Tbh Jade’s probably the one living in the Howkins’ master bedroom hahahaha

I can see her dating an old business man for some time, probably did not last for too long tho. Can you imagine Lukas and his sugar mommy/daddy and Rachel with her old businessman?? (except she’s rich she doesn’t need a sugar daddy yo)

She’s got a bunch of tattoos. Quotes and very common ones

She’s definitely the one that looked the less traumatized because her whole life has been shit and this wasn’t honestly wasn’t so big of a difference… But I like to believe she’s been to therapy, has seen a psychologist, or maybe is in a full psychanalyse… Maybe she was forced to because of the investigation but it doesn’t matter, I want her to speak and to heal, she deserves that

She makes me think a lot about Malia Tate in how they’re both assumed to be “street-smart”, not exceptionally smart kids, savages actually, but they somehow manage to never fall behind in classes in spite of a very chaotic scolarité. My girl IS smart, she’s just very bad at showing it

#rachel

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frattynattyladdie · 8 years ago

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McQueen: OK... Here we go. Focus. Speed. I am speed. McQueen: One winner. 42 losers. I eat losers for breakfast. McQueen: Breakfast. Wait, maybe I should have had breakfast. A little breck-y could be good for me. No,no,no, stay focused. Speed. McQueen: I'm faster than fast. Quicker than quick. I am Lightning! Mack: (knock-knock)Hey Lightning, are you ready? McQueen: Oh, yeah. Lightning's ready. Song McQueen: Ka-chow! Song Seller: Get your antenna here! Fans: You got that right, Slick. Bob Cutlass: Welcome back to the Dinoco 400. I'm Bob Cutlass, here with my good friend, Darrel Cartrip. We're midway through what may turn out to be a historic day for racing. Darrel Cartrip: Bob, my oil pressure's through the roof right now. If this gets more exciting, they're gonna have to tow me outta the booth! Bob Cutlass: Right you are, Darrell. Three cars are tied for the season points lead, heading into the final race of the season. And the winner of this race Darrell, will win the season title and, the Piston Cup. Does The King, Strip Weathers, have one more victory in him before retirement? Darrell: He's been Dinoco's golden boy for years! Can he win them one last Piston Cup? Bob: And, as always, in the second place spot we find Chick Hicks. He's been chasing that tailfin his entire career. Darrell: Chick thought this was his year, Bob. His chance to finally emerge from The King's shadow. But the last thing he expected was...Lightning McQueen! Bob: You know, I don't think anybody expected this. The rookie sensation come into the season unknown. But everyone knows him now. Darrell: Will he be the first rookie to win a Piston Cup and land Dinoco? Bob: The legend, the runner up, and the rookie! Three cars, one champion! Song Chick: No you don't. Fans: Oohh. What a ride! Chick: Hahaha Fans: Go get'em, McQueen! Go get'em! Fans: We love you, Lightning! Chick: Dinoco is all mine. Race car: Ahhhh! Darrell: Trouble, turn three! Chick: Haha. Get through that, Mcqueen. Bob: Ouw.. A huge crash behind the leaders! Fans: Wahh!! Bob: Wait a second, Darrell. McQueen is in the wreckage. Darrell: There's no way the rookie can make it through! Not in one piece that is. Mia & Tia: Lightning, ahhh. Darrell: Look at that, McQueen made it through! Bob: Man, a spectacular move by Lightning McQueen. McQueen: Yeah! Ka-chow! Fans: McQueen (7X) Fan: Yeah McQueen! Ka-chow! Bob: While everyone else heads into the pits, McQueen stays out to take the lead! Broken car: Don't take me out coach. I can still race! Chick: Haha. What do you think boys? A thing of beauty. Chick's coach: McQueen made it through! Chick: What? Chick's coach: He's not pitting! Chick: Come on! Get me out there! Let's go! Get me back out there! Come on! Bob: McQueen's not going into the pits! Darrell: You know the rookie just fired his crew chief. That's the third one this season! Bob: Well he says he likes working alone Darrell. Chick's coach: Go, go, go! Bob: Looks like Chick got caught up in the pits. Darrell: Yeah, after a stop like that, he's got a lot of ground to make up.Get ready boys, we're coming to the restart! Chick: Come on, come on, come on! McQueen's crew: We need tires now! Come on, let's go! McQueen: No,no,no,no! No tires, just gas! McQueen's crew: What! You need tires, you idiot! Darrell: Looks like it's all gas-and-go's for McQueen today. Bob: That's right. No tires again. Darrell: Normally I said a short-term gain, long-term loss, but it's sure is workin' for him. He obviously knows somethin' we don't know. Bob: This is it Darrell, one lap to go and Lightning McQueen has a huge lead. Darrell: All he's got it in the bag. Call in the dogs and put out the fire! We're gonna crown us a new champion! McQueen: Checkered flag, here I come! Darrell: Oh, no! McQueen has blown a tire! Bob: And with only one turn to go! Can he make it? McQueen's crew: You fool! The King's Coach: McQueen's blown a tire!, McQueen's blown a tire! Go,go,go! Darrell: He lost another tire! The King and Chick are coming up fast! Bob: They're entering turn three! McQueen: Come on. Darrell: I don't belive what I'm watching, Bob! Darrell: Lightning McQueen is hundred feet from his Piston Cup! Bob: The King and Chick rounding turn four. Darrell: Down the stretch they come! And it's, and it's... Bob: It's too close to call! Too close to call! Darrell: I don't belive it! (2X) Mia & Tia: Lightning! Bob: The most spectacular, amazing unequivocally, unbelievable ending in the history of the world! And we don't even know who won! Darrell: Look at that! Security: Hey, no cameras! Get outta here! Kori Turbowitz: We're here in Victory Lane, awaiting the race results. McQueen that was quite a risky move, not taking tires. McQueen crew: Tell me about it. Kori Turbowitz: Are you sorry you don't have a crew chief out there? McQueen's Crew: Hah! McQueen: Oh Kori. There's a lot more to racing than just winning. I mean, taking the race by a full lap... Where's the entertainment in that? No no no... I wanted to give folks a little sizzle. McQueen's crew: Sizzle? McQueen: Am I sorry I don't have a crew chief? No, I'm not. Cause I'm a one-man show. McQueen crew: Whats? Oh, yeah right. Kori Turbowitz: That was a very confident Lightning McQueen. Coming to you live from Victory Lane, I'm Kori Turbowitz. Cameramen: Hey, get out of the shot! McQueen: Yo, Chuck, what are you doing? You're blocking the camera. Everyone wants to see the bolt. McQuenn crew: What? McQueen: Now, back away. McQueen's crew: Ahh! That's it. Come on guys. McQueen: Whoa, team! Where are going? McQueen's crew: We quit, Mr. One-Man Show! McQueen: Oh, OK, leave. Fine. Hahaha. How will I ever find anyone else who knows how to fill me up with gas? Adios Chuck! McQueen's crew: And my name is not Chuck! McQueen: Oh, whatever. Chuck: Hey, Lightning! Yo! McQueen! Seriously, that was some pretty darn nice racin' out there. By me! Hahaha! Chick's crew: Zinger Chick: Welcome to the Chick era, baby! The Piston Cup... It's mine dude. It's mine. Hey fellas, how do you think I'm look in Dinoco blue? Dinoco blue! Hahaha! McQueen: In your dreams Thunder. Chick: Yeah, right. Thunder? What's he talkin' about, "Thunder"? McQueen: You know, cause' thunder always comes after lightning. Pew, Kaka-phow! Chick: Who here knew about the thunder thing? Chick's crew: I didn't. Cameramen: Give us the bolt! Cameramen: That's right. Cameramen: Right in the lens. Cameramen: Show me the bolt, baby! Cameramen: Smile, McQueen! Cameramen: Show me the bolt, McQueen! Cameramen: That's it! Tex: Ohh we, that was one close finish. You sure made Dinoco proud. Thank you, King. The King: Well, Tex, you've been good to me all these years. It's the least I could do. Dear: Whatever happens, you're winner to me, you old daddy rabbit. The King: Thanks, dear. We wouldn't be nothing without you. Mia: I'm Mia. Tia: I'm Tia. Mia & Tia: We're like your biggest fans! Ka-chow! McQueen: I love being me. Security: OK, girls, that's it. Mia & Tia: We love you, Lightning! Some guys far away: We love you more!! The King: Hey, buddy. You're one gutsy racer. McQueen: Oh, hey, Mr. The King. The King: You got more talent in one lug nut than a lot of cars has got in their whole body. McQueen: Really? Oh, that... The King: But you're stupid. McQueen: Excuse me? The King: This ain't a one-man deal, kid. You need to wise-up and get you self a good crew chief and a good team. And you ain't gonna win unless you got good folks behind you, and you let them do their job, like they should. Like I tell the boys at the shop... McQueen: A good team. Yeahhh. Dreaming Song. Mia & Tia: Oh, McQueen. The King: If you figure that out, you just gonna be OK. McQueen: Oh, yeah, that.. That is spectacular advice. Thank you Mr. The King. Speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in Piston Cup history... McQueen: A rookie has won the Piston Cup. Yes!! Speaker: We have a three-way tie. Chick: Oh, ho. Hey, McQueen, that must be really embarrassing. But I wouldn't be worry about it. Because I didn't do it! Hahaha! Speaker: Piston Cup officials have determined that a tiebreaker race between the three leaders will be held in California in one week. Chick: Well, thank you! Thanks to all of you out there! Thank you! Hey, rook, first one to California gets Dinoco all to himself. Ahh! No, not me! No, you rock, and you know that! Balloon: Oh, yeah! Woaah!! McQueen: First one to California gets Dinoco all to himself. Ohh, we'll see who gets there first, Chick. Huh? Mack: Hey, kid! Congrats on the tie. McQueen: I don't want to talk about it. Come on, let's go, Mack. Saddle up. What'd you do with my trailer? Mack: I parked it at your sponsor's tent. McQueen: What? Mack: You gotta make your personal appearance. McQueen: No. No! No,no,no,no! McQueen: Yes, yes, yes! Lightning McQueen here. And I use Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment, new rear end formula! Nothing soothes rusty bumper like Rust-eze. McQueen: Wow! Look at that shine! Use Rust-eze and you too can look like me! Ka-chow! Rust-eze Car: Hahaha. I met this car from Swampscott. He was so rusty he didn't even cast a shadow. Rust-eze Van: You could see his dirty undercarriage. Hahaha. McQueen: Uahh! I hate rusty cars. This is not good for my image. Mack: They did give you your big break. Besides, it's in your contract. McQueen: Oh, will you stop please? Just go get hooked up. Rust-eze Van: Winter is a grand old time. Rust-eze Car: Of this there are no ifs or buts. Rust-eze Van: But remember, all that salt and grime... Rust-eze Car: Can rust your bolts and freeze your... Rust-eze Van: Hey look! There he is! Our almost champ! Victory ran to your rear end in here, kid. Fan: Lightning McQueen, you are wicked fast! Fan: That race was a pisser! Fan: You were booking McQueen! McQueen: Give me a little room guys. Fred: You're my hero Mr.McQueen. McQueen: Yes, I know. Fred, Fred, thank you. Fred: He knows my name. He knows my name! Rust-eze Van: Looking good, Freddie! Rust-eze Car: Thanks to you Lightning, we had a banner year! Rust-eze Van: We might clear enough to buy you some headlights. Rust-eze Car: Are you saying he doesn't have headlights? Rust-eze Van: That's what I'm telling ya. It's just stickers! McQueen: Well, you know, racecars don't need headlights, because the track is always lit. Rust-eze Car: Yeah, well,so is my brother, but he still needs headlights. Hahaha McQueen: Hahaha! Ha!! Hahaha!! Rust-eze Car: Ladies and gentlemen, Lightning McQueen! Fans: Free Bird! McQueen: You know, the Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment team ran a great race today. And remember, with a little Rust-eze...And an insane amount of luck, you too can look like me. Ka-chow. Rust-eze Car: Hey, kid. Rust-eze Van: We love ya. And we're looking forward to another great year. Just like this year. Hahaha. McQueen: Not on your life. Rust-eze Car: Don't drive like my brother! Rust-eze Van: Oh Yeah, don't drive like my brother! Mack: California, here we come! McQueen: Dinoco, here we come! Song McQueen: I needed this. Hello? Harv: Is this Lightning McQueen, the world's fastest racing machine? McQueen: Is this Harv, the world's greatest agent? Harv: And it is such a honor to be your agent and it almost hurts to take ten percent of your winnings and merchandising. And ancillary rights in perpetuity. Anyway, what a race! Hot champ! I didn't see it, but I heard you were great. McQueen: Thanks, Harv. Harv: Listen, they're giving you 20 tickets for the tiebreaker thing in Cali. I'll pass 'em on to your friends. You shoot me the names. You let Harv rock it for you. All right, baby? McQueen: Right. Friends. Yes, there's a... Harv: OK, I get it, Mr.Popular. So many friends you can't even narrow it down. Hey, when you get to town, you better make time for your best friend! You gotta break bread with your mishpoacheh here! McQueen: Yeah, yeah, that'd be great! We should totally... Harv: Ok, I gotta jump, kid. Let me know how it goes. I'm out. McQueen: What? A minivan? Oh, come on Mack, you're in the slow lane. This is Lightning McQueen you're hauling here Mack: Just stopping off for a quick breather, kid. Old Mack needs a rest. McQueen: Absolutely not. McQueen: We're driving straight to all night till we get to California. We agreed to it. Mack: All night? May I remind you, federal DOT regs state... McQueen: Come on, I need to get there before Chick get hang with Dinoco. Mack: Ahh, all those sleeping trucks. Hey kid, I don't know if I can make it. McQueen: Oh, sure you can, Mack. Look, it'll be easy. I'll stay up with you. Mack: All night? McQueen: All night long. McQueen: Zzzzz... DJ Song Snot Rod: Ah, ahh, achowww! Wingo: Hahaha! Boost: Hey, yo, DJ. DJ: What up? Boost: We got ourselves a nodder. DJ: Hahaha. Mack: Pretty music. Boost: Yo, Wingo! Lane change, man. Wingo: Right back at ya! Hahaha. Snot Rod: Yeah! Boost: Oops! I missed. Snot Rod: You going on vacation? Tuner team: Hahaha. Boost: Oh, no, Snot Rod... Wingo: He's gonna blow! Snot Rod: Ahh...ahhh...ahhh...achoowww!!! Mack: Gesundheit! Hoho. One should never drive while drowsy. McQueen: MACK! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Hey,Mack! Mack! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack,wait for me! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack! Mack! McQueen: Mack! Mack... McQueen:...wait up! Mack. McQueen: Mack! Mack! McQueen: What?You're not Mack. Peterbilt: Mack?I ain't no Mack!I'm a Peterbilt, for dang sake! Peterbilt: Turn on your lights, you moron! McQueen: Mack... The Interstate! Sheriff: Ahh!. Not in my town, you don't. McQueen: Oh, no...Oh, maybe he can help me! He's shooting at me! Why is he shooting at me! Sheriff: I haven't gone this fast in years. I'm gonna blow a gasket or somethin'. McQueen: Serpentine! Serpentine, serpentine! Sheriff: What in the blue blazes? Crazy hot rodder. Filmore: I'm telling you, man, every third blink is slower. Sarge: The sixties weren't good for you, were they? McQueen: What? That's not the Interstate! Ahh ho, Auw, auw,auw! Ahhhh! No, no, no, no! Filmore: I'm not the only seeing this, right? Sarge: Incoming! Filmore: Whoa man. Sarge: No! Ramone: Hey, you scratch my paint! McQueen: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Luigi: My tires! McQueen: Phoah! Red: Huh! McQueen: Uargh! Red: Huh! Filmore: Fly away, Stanley. Be free! Sheriff: Boy, you're in a heap of trouble. Kori Turbowitz: We're live at the Los Angeles International Speedway as the first competitor, Lightning McQueen, is arriving at the track. Cameramen: Is it true he's gonna pose for Cargirl? Cameramen: Lightning, what's your strategy? Woahh! Mack: What? Did I forget to wipe my mud flaps? News: McQueen's driver arrived in California, but McQueen was missing. News: Racecar Lightning McQueen was reported missing. News: He scheduled to race an unprecedented... News: Sponsor stated they have no idea where he is. Junior: I hope Lightning's OK. I sure hate to see anything bad happen to him. Jay Limo: I don't know what's harder to find, Lightning McQueen or a crew chief who'll work for him! Hummer: Lightning McQueen must be found at all costs! News: They're all asking the same question: Where is McQueen? McQueen: Oh, boy. Where am I? Mater: Mornin', sleepin' beauty! McQueen: Ahhhhh!! Mater: Hahaha! Boy, I was wonderin' when you was gonna wake up. McQueen: Take whatever you want! Just don't hurt me! a parking boot? Why do I have a parking boot on? What's going on here? Please! Mater: You're funny. I like you already. My name's Mater. McQueen: Mater. Mater: Yeah, like "tuh-mater", but without the "tuh". What's your name? McQueen: You don't know my name? Mater: Uhh, no, I know your name. Is your name Mater too? McQueen: What? Look, I need to get to California as fast as possible. Where am I? Mater: Where are you? Shoot! You're in Radiator Springs. The cutest little town in Carburetor County. McQueen: Oh, great. Just great! Mater: Well, if you think that's great, you should see the rest of the town. McQueen: You know, I'd love to see the rest of the town! So if you could just open the gate, take this boot off, you and me, we go cruisin', check out the local scene... Mater: Dad-gum! McQueen: How'd that be, Tuh-Mater? Mater: Cool Sheriff: Mater! What did I tell you about talkin' to the accused? Mater: To not to. Sheriff: Well, quit yer yappin' and tow this delinquent road hazard to traffic court. Mater: Well, we'll talk later, Mater. Haha. "Later, Mater." That's funny! Sheriff: The Radiator Springs Traffic Court will come to order! Ramone: Hey, you scratched my paint! I ought take a blowtorch to you, man! Luigi: You broke-a the road! You a very bad car! Fillmore: Fascist! Commie! McQueen: Officer, talk to me, babe. How long is this gonna take? I gotta get to California, pronto. Sheriff: Where's your lawyer? McQueen: Tuh, I don't know. Tahiti maybe. He's got a timeshare there. Sheriff: When a defendant has no lawyer, the court will assign one to him. Hey! Anyone want to be his lawyer? Mater: Shoot, I'll do it, Sheriff! Sheriff: All rise! The Honorable Doc Hudson presiding. Luigi: Show-off. Sheriff: May Doc have mercy on your soul. Doc Hudson: All right, I wanna know who's responsible for wreckin' my town, Sheriff. I wanna his hood on a platter! I'm gonna put him in jail till he rots! No, check that. I'm gonna put him in jail till the jail rots on top of him, and then I'm gonna move him to a new jail and let that jail rot. I'm... Throw him out of here, Sheriff. I want him out of my courtroom. I want him out of our town! Case dismissed. McQueen: Yes! Mater: Boy, I'm purty good at this lawyerin' stuff. Sally: Sorry I'm late, Your Honor! McQueen: Holy Porsche! She's gotta be from my attorney's office. Hey, thanks for comin', we're all set. He's letting me go. Sally: He's letting you go? McQueen: Yeah, your job's pretty easy today. All you have to do now is stand there and let me look at you. Listen, I'm gonna cut to the chase. Me, you, dinner. Ka-chow! Sally: What the...? Auww! Please! McQueen: I know, I get that reaction a lot. I create feelings in others that they themselves don't understand. Sally: Ohhh, auww! McQueen: Oh, I'm sorry. Did I scare you? Mater: Well, a little bit, but I'll be alright. Sally: OK. I'm gonna go talk to the judge. McQueen: Do what you gotta do, baby. Oh, but listen. Be careful. Folks around here are not firing on all cylinders, if you know what I mean. Mater: Ka-ching! Auww! Sally: I'll keep that in mind. Hey there, Mater. Mater: Howdy, Sally. Sally: Hi, folks! Folks: Good morning! Sally. McQueen: You know her? Mater: She's the town attorney and my fiancee. McQueen: What? Mater: Nah, I'm just kiddin'. She just like me for my body. Sally: Doc, you look great this morning. Did you do something different with your side view mirrors? Doc: What do you want, Sally? Sally: Ah, come on, make this guy fix the road. The town needs this. Doc: No. I know his type. Racecar. That's the last thing this town needs. Sally: OK, I didn't want to have to do this, Doc, but you leave me no choice. Fellow citizens, you're all aware of our town's proud history. Doc: Here she goes again. Sally: Radiator Springs, the glorious jewel strung on the necklage of Route 66, the mother road! It is our job and our pleasure to take care of the travelers on our stretch of that road. Sarge: Travelers? What travelers? Filmore: Ignore him. Sally: But how, I ask you, are we to care for those travelers if there is no road for them to drive on? Luigi, what do you have at your store? Luigi: Tires Sally: And if no one can get to you? Luigi: I won't sell any...tires. I will lose everything! Ohho. Sally: Flo, what do you have at your store? Flo: I have gas. Lotsa gas! Sally: OK boys, stay with me. And, and, Flo, what'll happen if no one can come to your station to buy gas? Flo: I'll go outta business and... we'll have to leave town. Sally: And what's gonna happen to all of us if Flo leaves town and closes her station? Folks: Without gas, we're done for! Lizzie: What? Sally: So, don't you think the car responsible should fix our road? Lizzie: The only guy strong enough to fix that road is Big Al! Ramone: Lizzie, the guy left, like, 15 years ago. Lizzie: Then why are you bringing him up, you lemon? Sally: Oh, he can do it. He's got the horsepower. So, what do you want him to do? Folks: Fix the road! Sally: Because we are a town worth fixing! Folks: Yeah!!! Doc: Order in the court! Seems like my mind has been changed for me. Folks: Yeah!! McQueen: No! Filmore: Nice rulin'. McQueen: Ohh, I am so not take you to dinner. Sally: That's OK, Stickers. You can take Bessie. Mater: Oh man, you got to work with Bessie! I'd give my left two lug nuts for somethin' like that. McQueen: Bessie? Who's Bessie? Doc: This here is Bessie, finest road-pavin' machine ever built. I'm hereby sentencing you to community service. You're gonna fix the road under my supervision. McQueen: What? This place is crazy! Mater: Hey, I know this may be a bad time right now, but tha, you owe me $32,000 in legal fees. McQueen: What? Doc: So we're gonna hitch you up to sweet Bessie, and you're gonna pull her nice. McQueen: You're gotta be kidding me. Doc: You start there where the road begins, you finish down there where the road ends. Mater: Holy shoot! McQueen: Whoa, whoa, whoa! How long is this gonna take? Doc: Well, fella does it right, should take him about five days. McQueen: Five days? But I should be in California schmoozing Dinoco right now! Doc: Then if I were you, I'd quit yappin and start workin'! Hook him up, Mater. Mater: Okay-dokey. McQueen: Freedom!! Mater: Maybe I should've-a hooked him up to Bessie...and then-a...then took the boot off. McQueen: Wuuuhuuu! Goodbye, Radiator Springs, and goodbye, Bessie! California, here I come! Yeah! Oh, fell that wind. Yes! No,no,no,no! Outta gas? How can I be outta gas? Sheriff: Hahaha. Boy, we ain't as dumb as you think we are. McQueen: But,but,but how did, how did...you...? Sally: We siphoned your gas while you were passed out. Ka-chow. McQueen: Auw,auw,auw,auw,auwww!! Sheriff: Hahaha. Sheriff: Gentlemen. Sarge: Sheriff. Filmore: Hai, Sheriff. Luigi: Why the tires are here? Guido: Sono sempre stati qui. Luigi: They were better well before. Guido: Stai sempre a parlare. Luigi: Guido! Lizzie: Red, can you move over? I want to get look at that sexy hot rod. Mater: You know, I used to be a purty good whistler. I can't do it now of course, on account of sometimes I get fluid built up in my engine block, but Doc said he's gonna fix it dough. He can fix about anything. That's why we made him the judge. Boy, you shoulda heard me on Giddy-up, Oom Papa Mow Mow. Now, I'm not one to brag, but people come purty far to see me get low on the "Mow-Mow". McQueen: Ah? Ah, man, that's just great! Mater: Hey, what's wrong? McQueen: My lucky sticker's all dirty. Mater: Thaah, that ain't nothin'. I'll clean it for ya. McQueen: No,no,no! That wouldn't be necessary. Hey! Hey, big fella! Yeah, you in the red! I could use a little hose down. Help me wash this off. What, where's he goin'? Mater: Oh, he's still a little bit shy, and he hates you for killin' his flowers. McQueen: I shouldn't have to put up with this. I'm a precision instrument of speed and aerodynamics. Mater: You hurt your what? McQueen: I'm a very famous racecar! Luigi: You are a famous racecar? A real racecar? McQueen: Yes, I'm a real racecar. What do you think? Look at me. Luigi: I have followed racing my entire life of my whole life! McQueen: Then you know who I am. I'm Lightning McQueen. Luigi: Lightening McQueen! McQueen: Yes! Yes! Luigi: I must scream it to the world! My excitement from the top of someplace very high! Do you know many Ferraris? McQueen: No,no,no. They race on the European circuit. I'm in the Piston Cup! What? Luigi: Luigi follow only the Ferraris. Flo: Is that what I think it is? Sally: Customers. Customers! Customers, everyone! Customers! OK. Lizzie: Customers? Sally: All right, everybody calm down for a long time. Just remember what we rehearsed. Make sure your "Open, please come in" signs are out. And you all know what to do. All right, nobody panics. Here we go! Minny: Van, I just don't see any on-ramp anywhere. Van: Minny, I know exactly where we are. Minny: Yeah, we're in the middle of nowhere. Van: Honey, please. Sally: Hello. Welcome to Radiator Springs, gateway to Ornament Valley. Legendary for it's quality service and friendly hospitality. How can we help you? Van: We don't need anything, thank you very much. Minny: Whoa, honey ask her direction to the Interstate. Van: There's no need to ask for directions. Minny, I know exactly where we're going. Minny: He did the same thing on our trip to Shakopee. You know, we were headed over there for the Crazy Days, and we... Van: OK,OK. Really. We're just peachy, OK? Filmore: What you really need is the sweet taste of my homemade, organic fuel. Van: No, it doesn't agree with my tank. Minny: We're just trying to find the Interstate. Sarge: Good to see you, Soldier! Come on by Sarge's Surplus Hut for all your government surplus needs. Minny: Ohh, honey, surplus! Van: I think we have too much surplus. Sally: I do have a map over the Cozy Cone Motel. And if you do stay, we offer a free Lincoln Continental breakfast. Minny: Honey, she's got a map. Van: I don't need a map! I have the GPS. Never need a map again, thank you. Flo: How 'bout somethin' to drink? Stop at Flo's V8 Cafe. Finest fuel on Route 66. Van: No, we just top off. Luigi: And if you need tires, stop by Luigi's Casa Della Tires, home of the Leaning Tower of Tires. Minny: We're just trying to find the Interstate. Ramone: But you do need a paint job man. Ramone will paint you up right. Hey, anything you want! You know, like a flame job. Minny: No, thanks... Ramone: Maybe ghost flames! You like old school pinstripin'? Von Dutch style ha? Minny: Oh, honey, look. Von Dutch. Van: Oh, ho, OK, no. Ahahaha. We're gonna be going now, OK? Auww! Lizzie: A little somethin' to remember us by, OK? Van: Oh,ha,ha. OK! Sally: Come back soon, OK? I mean, you know where we are! Tell your friends! Van: HohohOK! Yes. You bet. Minny: Thanks again, folks. Bye-bye now. McQueen: Psst! Psst! Hey! Hey, hey,hey! I know how to get to the Interstate! Minny: Oh, do ya? Van: Minny, no. McQueen: Yeah, yeah,yeah. No, not really. But listen. I'm Lightning McQueen, the famous racecar. I'm being held heren against my will. And I need you to call my team, so they can rescue me, and get me to California in time for me to win The Piston Cup. Do you understand? McQueen: No,no,no,no,no. No, It's the truth! I'm telling you! You gotta help me! Don't leave me here! I'm in hillbilly hell! My IQ's dropping by the second! I'm becoming one of them! Sally: OK, don't worry. They know where we are now. They're gonna tell their friends. You'll see. Radio: And we'll be back for our Hank Williams marathon... Sally: That's good. Radio:...after a Piston Cup update. Still no sign of Lightning McQueen. Meanwhile, Chick Hicks arrived in California and today became the first car to spend practice time on the track. Chick: Yeah, well it's just nice to get out here before the other competitors. You know, get a headstart. Gives me an edge. Dreaming Song Chick: Yeah. Chick: Hey, McQueen... Eat your heart out. McQueen: Mater, let me get this straight. I can go when this road is done. That's the deal, right? Mater: That's what they done did said. McQueen: OK. Outta my way. I got a road to finish. Mater: He's done! Doc: Done? Mater: Ahmhm. Doc: It's only been an hour. McQueen: I'm done. Look, I'm finished. Just say thank you, and I'll be on my way. That's all I gotta say. Mater: Weehoo! I'm the first one on the new road! Ahho! It rides purty smooth. Sally: It looks awful! McQueen: Well, it matches the rest of the town. Sally: Ahh. Red: Umph, huhuhuh. Sally: Red. Who do you think you are? McQueen: Look, Doc said when I finish, I could go. That was the deal. Doc: The deal was you fix the road, not making it worse. Now, scrape it off! Start over again. McQueen: Hey, look, grandpa, I'm not a bulldozer. I'm a racecar. Doc: Hohoho. Is that right? Then why don't we just have a little race? Me and you. Sally: What? McQueen: Hohoho. Me and you. Is that a joke? Doc: If you win, you go and I fix the road. If I win, you do the road my way. Sheriff: Doc, what're you doin'? McQueen: Hahaha. I don't mean to be rude here Doc, but you probably go zero to sixty in like what? Three-point-five years? Doc: Then I reckon you ain't got nothin' to worry about. McQueen: You know what old timer? That's a wonderful idea. Let's race. Sheriff: Gentlemen, this will be a one-lap race. You will drive to Willy's Butte, go around Willy's Butte and come back. There will be no bumpin', no cheatin', no spittin', no bittin', no road rage, no maimin', no oil slickin', no pushin', no shovin', no backstabbin', no road-hoggin' and no lollygaggin'. McQueen: Speed. I'm speed. Float like a Cadillac, sting like a Beemer. Luigi: OhHohohoo. My friend Guido, he dream to give a real racecar a pit stop. Guido: Pit stop. McQueen: Aa, haha. The race is only one lap, guys. Uno lappo! Don't need any help. I work solo mio. Luigi: Fine. Race your way. McQueen: No pit stoppo. Comprendo? Guido: OK. Sheriff: Gentlemen. Start your engines! Ramone: Hijole! Check that out! Filmore: Whoa. Flo: Emm, emm. Sally: Great idea, Doc. Now the road will never get done. Sheriff: Luigi. Luigi: Hohoho. On your mark, get set. Uno for the money, due for the show, tre to get ready, and quattro to... I can't belive it. Go!! Hahaha. Doc: Yehaa! Hahaha! Sally: Yeah. Luigi: Huh? Doc, the flag means go. Remember the flag. Here we go. Go. Ramone: Uhh, Doc, what are you doing, man? Doc: Oh, dear. It would seem I'm off to a poor start. Well, better late than never. Come on, Mater. Might need a little help. Mater: Ahh, OK. Doc: You got your tow cable? Mater: Well, yeah. I always got my tow cable. Why? Doc: Ohh, just in case. McQueen: Ahh,auw,auw,auw,no,no,no,no,no! Ramone: Oh, man! Auww!! Filmore: Whoa. Bad trip, man. Doc: Hey! Was that floatin' like a Cadillac, or was that stingin' like a Beemer? I'm confused. Mater: Eh,eh,eh. Doc: You drive like you fix roads. Lousy! Have fun fishin', Mater McQueen: Ahhh! Mater: I'm startin' to think he knowed you was gonna crash! McQueen: Thank you, Mater. Thank you. McQueen: I can make a little turn on dirt. You think? No. And now I'm a day behind. I'm never gonna get outta here! Ramone: Hey, ese! You need a new paint job, man! McQueen: No, thank you. Filmore: How 'bout some organic fuel? Sarge: That freak juice? McQueen: Pass. Flo: Whooh, watchin' him workin' is makin' me thirsty. Anybody else want somethin' to drink? Mater: Nah, not me, Flo. I'm on one of them there special diets. I'm a precisional instrument of speed and aero-matics. McQueen: "You race like you fix roads." I'll show him. I will show him! McQueen: Great! I hate it! Hate, hate, hate, hate it!! Doc: Haha. Music. Sweet music. Sally: Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. McQueen: Radiator Springs, a happy place. Bessie: Peckkk. McQueen: Whoa, OK, Bessie you think that funny? Great! I'm talking to Bessie now! I'm talkin to Bessie!! Mater: Hahaha. Sally: Wow. Mater: Mornin', Sally! Hey, look at this here fancy new road that Lightnin' McQueen done just made! Sally: Yes! Amazing! Ramone: Yeah! Flo: Ohh, Ramone, Mama ain't seen you that low in years. Ramone: I haven't seen a road like this in years. Flo: Well, then let's cruise, baby. Ramone: Low and slow. Luigi: E Bellissima! It's beautiful! Guido, look, it's a like it was paved by angels. Ohhh. Mater: Oh, I tell you what. I bet even the roads on the moon ain't this smooth. Sally: Doc, look at this. Shoulda tossed him into the cactus a lot sooner, huh? Doc: Well, he ain't finished yet. Still got a long way to go. Luigi: Guido, look at Luigi! Hahaha. This is fantastico! Sally: That looks like fun! Mater, I got dibs, next turn! Lizzie: Hey, Luigi, this new road makes your place look like a dump. Luigi: Ahhh, that crazy old devil woman. Ohh, ohh. She's right! Sally: Ohh, ahh! Luigi: Guido! Doc: That punk actually did a good jab. Well, now... where the hack is he? Doc: Sheriff! Is he makin' another run for it? Sheriff: No,no. He ran outta asphalt in the middle of the night, asked me if he could come down here. All he's tryin' to do is make that there turn. McQueen: No,no,no,no! Ohh, great. Perfect turns on every track I've ever raced on. Doc: Sheriff, why don't you go get yourself a quart of oil at Flo's. Doc: I'll keep an eye on him. Sheriff: Well, thanks, Doc. I've been feelin' a quart low. McQueen: Ahhhhh! Phuahh, thahh! Doc: This ain't asphalt, son. This is dirt. McQueen: Oh, great. What do you want? You hear to gloat? Doc: You don't have three-wheel brakes, so you got to pitch it hard, break it loose and then just drive it with the throttle. Give it too much, you'll be outta the dirt and into the tulips. McQueen: So you're a judge, a doctor and a racing expert. Doc: I'll put it simple. If you goin' hard enough left, you'll find yourself turnin' right. McQueen: Ooo, right. That makes perfect sense. Turn right to go left. Yes! Thank you! Or should I say,"No thank you"? Because in Opposite World, maybe that really means, "Thank you"! Tuh, crazy grandpa car. What an idiot! Doc: Ahhh. McQueen: Turn right to go left. Oh. Whoa, auwwww. Oh, that... AUUUUUWWWWWW!!! McQueen: Turn right to go left. Guess what. I tried it. You know what? This crazy thing happened... I went right! Lizzie: You keep talkin' to yourself, people'll think you crazy. McQueen: Thanks for the tip. Lizzie: What? I wasn't talkin' to you. Sally: Oh, Guido, e bellissimo! Guido: Che cosa? Sally: It looks great! This is great! Guido: Ti piace, eh? Si, si, bellissimo. Mater: Ummmph. Oh, lord. Hehehe. Sheriff: Mater! I need you to watch the prisoner tonight. Mater: Well, dad-gum! Wait a minute, what if he tries to run again? Sheriff: Just let him run outta gas and tow him on back. But keep an eye on him. Mater: Yes, sir! McQueen: While I'm stuck here paving this stinkin' road, Chick's in California schmoozing Dinoco. My Dinoco. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Who's touching me? Luigi: You have a slow leak. Guido, he fix. You make a such a nice new road. You come to my shop. Luigi take a good care of you. Eventhough you not a Ferrari. You buy four tires, I give you a full size spare absolutely free! McQueen: Look, I get all my tires for free. Luigi: Hohoho.. I like your style, eh? You drive the hard bargain. OK. Luigi make you a new deal. You buy one tire, I give you three for free! Flo: Aaa... Would you look at that? Ramone, Ramone! Ramone: Hm,hm,hm. Luigi: Then Luigi make you a new deal McQueen: No,no,no,no. Deal me out. Pass. No, thank you. Luigi: No,no,no,no,no. This is it. My last offer. You buy one tire, I give you seven-a snow tire for all free! Done. You interested, you call me. You know where I am. McQueen: Fuuuhhh. Ahhhh. Stop! Let me...Tuhh, puahh!! sally: Oh, Red, you missed a spot. See it right there? On the hood right there. McQueen: No, no! Noooo!! Stop, stop! That cold!! Help! Please! Stop! Sally: Thanks, Red. McQueen: What was that for? Sally: Do you want to stay at the Cozy Cone or what? McQueen: Huh? Sally: And if you do, you gotta be clean. 'Cause even here in hillibilly hell we have standards. McQueen: What,I...? I don't get it. Sally: Nothing I just thought I'd say thank you for doin' a great job. So I thought I'd let you stay with me. I mean, not with me! But there. Not with me there, but there in your own Cozy Cone. And I'd be in my cone, and it's... McQueen: Wait. Wait, you're being nice to me. Sally: I mean if you want to stay at the dirty impound, thats, thats fine. You know, I understand you criminal types. McQueen: No,no,no,no. That's OK. Yeah, the Cozy Cone. Sally: Ehhh. It's newly refurbished McQueen: Haha. Yeah, it's like a clever little twist the motel's made out of caution cones, which, of course, cars usually try to avoid, now we're gonna stay in them. Haha. That's funny. Sally: Figure that all out on your own, did you? Cone number one, if you want. McQueen: Auuhhh. McQueen: Hey, do I spy a little pinstriping tattoo back there? Sally: Auuww. Haha. That's just a... Ahhahaha. Auuww. You saw that? Yeah! Just gonna be going. Gonna...Yeah. Mater: You know, I once knew this girl Doreen. Good-lookin' girl. Looked just like a Jaguar, only she was a truck! You know, I used to crash into her, just so I could spoke to her. McQueen: What are you talking about? Mater: I don't know. Hey, I know somethin' we can do tonight, 'cause I'm in charge of watchin' you! McQueen: No, Mater, I gotta finish this road, and I have to get out of here. Mater: Well, that's all right, Mr. I Can't Turn On Dirt. You probably couldn't handle it anyway. McQueen: Whoa, whoa, easy now, Mater. You know who you're talkin' to? This is Lightning McQueen. I can handle anything. McQueen: Mater, I'm not doin' this. Mater: Oh, come on, you'll love it. Hehehe. Tractor-tippin's fun. McQueen: This is ridiculous. Mater: All right, listen. When I say go, we go. But don't let Frank catch ya. Go! McQueen: Whoa! Wait! Who, who's Frank? Mater. Wait, Mater! Mater: OK, here's what you do. You just sneak up in front of 'em, and then honk. And they do the rest. Watch this. Mater: Hahahaha. I swear, tractors is so dumb! I tell you what, buddy, you don't get much better than this. McQueen: Yep, you're livin' the dream, Mater boy. Mater: I don't care who you are, that's funny right there. Oh, you turn, bud. McQueen: Mater, I can't. I don't even have a horn. Mater: Baby. McQueen: I'm not a baby. Mater: Puuuck, puck, puck. McQueen: Fine. Stop! stop, OK? All right. I'll do something. Mater & McQueen: Hahahahaha!!! Mater: That's Frank. McQueen: Ahhhh!! Mater: Run, hahaha , run!!! Mater: Run! He's gonna get ya! Hahaha!! Sally: Customers! Mater: Tomorrow night we can go look for the ghostlight! McQueen: I can't wait, Mater. Mater: Oh, yeah, I'm tellin' ya! Oh, boy, you gotta admit that was funnn unn! McQueen: Oh, yeah...yeah. Mater: Well, we better get you back to the impound lot. McQueen: You know, actually, Sally's gonna let me stay at the motel. Mater: Aaaa... Gettin' cozy at the Cone, is we? McQueen: Oh, come...No. No, are you kidding? Besides, she can't stand me. And I don't like her, to be honest. Mater: Yeah, you probably right. Hey, look, there's Miss Sally! McQueen: Where, where? Mater: Hahaha. You're in love with Miss Sally. McQueen: No, I'm not. Mater: Yes, you do. McQueen: No way. Mater: Way. McQueen: Come on, look Mater: You're in love with Miss Sally(2X) McQueen: OK, that's real mature Mater, real grown up. Mater: You love her (7X) McQueen: Wait...All right. OK. Mater, Mater, Mater, no. Will you stop that? Mater: Stop what? McQueen: That's driving backwards stuff. It's creeping me out. You're gonna wreck on somethin'. Mater: Wreck? Shoot! I'm the world's best backwards driver! You just watch this right here, lover boy. McQueen: What are you doing? Watch out! Look out! Mater? Mater! Mater! McQueen: Hey take it easy, Mater! Mater: Waaaaaaa! Ha,ha,ha! Hee,hee. McQueen: Hahaha. He's nuts. Mater: No need to watch where I'm goin'. Just need to know where I've been. McQueen: Whoa, that was incredible! How'd you do that? Mater: Rearview mirrors. We'll get you some, and I'll teach you if you want. McQueen: Yeah, maybe I'll use it in my big race. Mater: What's so important about this race of yours, anyway? McQueen: It's not just a race. We're talking about the Piston Cup! I've been dreaming about it my whole life! I'll be the first rookie in history ever to win it. And when I do, we're talkin' big new sponsor, with private helicopters. No more medicated bumper ointment. No more rusty old cars. Mater: What's wrong with rusty old cars? McQueen: Well, I don't mean you, Mater. I mean other old cars. You know? Not like you. I like you. Mater: Nahhh, it's OK, buddy. Hey, you think maybe one day I can get a ride in one of them helicopters? I mean, I've always wanted to ride in one of them fancy helicopters. McQueen: Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, sure. Mater: You mean it? McQueen: Oh, yeah. Anything you say. Mater: I knew it. I knowed I made a good choice! McQueen: In what? Mater: My best friend. Mater: See you tomorrow, buddy! McQueen and Sally parked beneath a tree, K-I-S somethin'-somethin'-somethin'-t!! McQueen: Hahaha! Whoa, whoa. Haha. McQueen: Number one. Number one...Ahhh...Number one! McQueen: Ahh, this is nice. Sally: Hey, Stickers. McQueen & Sally: Huh!! Sally: I'm sorry. McQueen: Wohho!! You scared me. You gotta be careful. Sally: I scared myself scaring you scaring me. McQueen: I mean, I wasn't like "scared" scared. Sally: No, of course not. Not. McQueen: I was more... Sally: Just I overheard you talkin' to Mater. McQueen: When? Just, just now? What, what did, what did you hear? Sally: Oh, just something about a helicopter ride. McQueen: Oh, yeah. Yeah, he got a kick out of that, didn't he? Sally: Did you mean it? McQueen: What? Sally: That you'll get him a ride. McQueen: Oh, who knows? I mean first things first. I gotta get outta here and make the race. Sally: Ah, hah. You know...Mater trusts you. McQueen: Yeah, OK. Sally: Did you mean that? McQueen: What? Sally: Was it just a "Yeah, OK", or "Yeah...OK" or"Yea-yeah, OK" McQueen: Look, I'm exhausted. It's kinda been a long day. Sally: Yeah, OK. G'night. McQueen: Oh ah. Hey, thank you. Sally: What did you just say? McQueen: You know, thanks for lettin' me stay here. It's nice to be out of the impund, and this is... It's great. Newly refurbished, right? Sally: Yeah. McQueen: Good night. Sally: Good night. Sally: Huhh. Sarge: Will you turn that disrespectful junk off? Filmore: Respect the classics, man. It's Hendrix! McQueen: Ahh...huh...please...huh... Dreaming Song McQueen: No!! Frank: Uarghhh!! McQueen: Noooo!!! I gotta get outta here! McQueen: Hey, have you seen the Sheriff? Oh! Oh, my gosh. Oh! Doc: Hey, what are you doin'? Sheriff: Get a good peak, city boy? McQueen: I,a..a..I just need my daily gas ration from the Sheriff. Doc: Wait for him at Flo's. Now get outta here. McQueen: I've been trying to get outta here for three days! Sheriff: Hope you enjoyed the show! McQueen: Whoaho, Doc. Time to clean out the garage, buddy, come on. McQueen: What? He has a Piston Cup? McQueen: Oh, my gosh. Three Piston Cup? Doc: Sign says stay out. McQueen: You, you have three Piston Cups. How could you have... Doc: I knew you couldn't drive. I didn't know you couldn't read. McQueen: You're the Hudson Hornet! Doc: Wait over at Flo's, like I told ya! McQueen: Of course. I can't belive I didn't see it before. You're The Fabulous Hudson Hornet! You still to hold the record for most wins in single season. Oh, we gotta talk. You gotta show me your tricks. Please. Doc: I already tried that. McQueen: And you won the championship three times! Look at those trophies! Doc: You look. All I see is a bunch of empty cups. Filmore: You know, some automotive yoga could really lower your RPM's, man. Sarge: Oh, take a car wash, hippie. Flo: Yeah, look at my husband, y'all. Hooo...That's your color! Ramone: Yellow, baby. Hahaha. Flo: Mmm! You smokin' hot! Sheriff: There he is! McQueen: Oh, my gosh! Did you know Doc is a famous racecar? Folks: Hahahaha! Sheriff: Doc? Our Doc? Sarge: Not Doc Hudson. McQueen: No,no,no,no, it's true! He's a real racing legend. He's The Fabulous Hudson Hornet! Flo: Fabulous? I never seen Doc drive more than 20 miles an hour. I mean, have you ever seen him race? McQueen: No, but I wish I could have of. They say he was amazing! He wins three Piston Cups. Mater: Phooah!! He did what in his cup? Sheriff: I think the heat's startin' to get to the boy! Lizzie: Well, I'll say! Look how red he is! Ramone: Yeah, I think he needs a new coat of poly, man. Mater: Are you sick, buddy? Sheriff: You are lookin' a little peaked. Ramone: Yeah, he needs a new coat of poly for sure! Sheriff: Hey, hey! What are you doin'? Sally: It's OK, Sheriff. You can trust me, right? Sheriff: I trust you, all right. It's him I'm worried about. Sally: Mmm... I trust him. Come on, let's take a drive. McQueen: A drive? Sally: Yeah, a drive. Don't you big city racecars ever just take a drive? McQueen: Ahhh...No. No, we don't. Sally: Hey, Stickers! Do you comin' or what? Flo: Ahmm. And you thought he was gonna run. Ramone: Hey, can you believe it, man? He actually thought Doc was a famous racecar! Hahaha... That's so too much!! McQueen: OK, you got me out here. Where are we goin'? Sally: I don't know. McQueen: Whoa! Yes. Sally: Hahaha. McQueen: Whoa! Hahaha. Uahh!! Sally: Hahaha. McQueen: Thahhh! Sally: Ah.. hahaha! Sally: Ah.. hahaha! McQueen: Hahaha! Thuhhh!!Thuhh!! McQueen: Wow! What is this place? Sally: Wheel Well. Used to be the most popular stop on the mother road. McQueen: This place? Sally: Yeah, imagine...Oh, imagine what it must have been like to stay here. McQueen: You know, I don't get you. How does a Porsche wind up in a place like this? Sally: Well, it's really pretty simple. I was...an attorney in LA livin' life in the fast lane, and. McQueen: Oh, you were, were you? Were you rich? Sally: What? McQueen: Just...clues to the puzzle. Sally: Yeah, OK. Well, that was my life. And you know what? It never felt...happy. McQueen: Yeah. I mean...really? Sally: Yeah. So I left California. Just drove and drove and finally broke down right here. Doc fixed me up, Flo took me in. Well, they all did. And I never left. McQueen: Yeah. You know, I understand. You need a little R & R. Recharge and old batteries. But you know, after a while, why didn't you go back? Sally: I fell in love. McQueen: Ohh. Sally: Yep. McQueen: Corvette? Sally: No. Sally: I fell in love with this. McQueen: Whoa. Look at that. Look, they're drivin' right by. They don't even know what they're missing! Sally: Well, it didn't used to be that way. McQueen: Oh, yeah? Sally: Yeah. Forty years ago, that Interstate down there didn't exist. McQueen: Really? sally: Yeah. Back then, cars came across the country a whole different way. McQueen: How do you mean? Sally: Well, the road didn't cut through land like that Interstate. It moved with the land, you know? It rose, it fell, it curved. Folk: Mornin'! Folk: Nice day, huh? Sally: Cars didn't drive on it to make a great time. They drove on it to have a great time. Song McQueen: Well, what happened? Sally: The town got bypassed just to save ten minutes of driving. Song McQueen: How great would it have been to see this place in its heyday! Sally: Ohh...I can't tell you how many times I've dreamed of that. But one of these days, we'll find a way to get it back on the map. McQueen: Yeah. Hey, listen, thanks for the drive. I had a great time. It's kinda nice to slow down every once in a while. Sally: You're welcome. Mater: Hey, listen, listen! If anybody asks you, we was out smashin' mailboxes, OK? McQueen: Wha... What? Ramone: Oh, man, the paint's still wet! Luigi: No,no,no,no! Get out of the store! Hey! Don't eat the radial! Here, take-a the snow tires. Sheriff: Mater! Mater: I wasn't tractor-tippin'! Sheriff: Then where did all these gol-durn tractors come from? Mater: Whoa, boy! Whoa! McQueen: Hahaha. Hey! Hey guys. There's one goin' this way. I got it. McQueen: Come here, little tractor, come here. Yeah, that's a good tractor. No,no,no,no, come here. What are you doing? You're not supposed to go wandering off all...alone. McQueen: What are you doin' with those old racin' tires? Doc: Huuhhh. McQueen: Come on, Doc, drive. Doc: Ahhhh. Yeah. McQueen: Wow! You're amazing! What are you doin'? Doc, wait! Mater: Giddup right in there! Come on, Rusty. Weee...heyy! McQueen: Doc, hold it! Seriously, your driving's incredible! Doc: Wonderful. Now, go away. McQueen: Hey, I mean it. You've still got it! Doc: I'm askin' you to leave. McQueen: Come on. I'm a racecar, you're... a much older racecar, but under the hood you and I are the same. Doc: We are not the same! Understand? Now, get out. McQueen: How could a car like you quit at the top of your game? Doc: You think I quit? McQueen: Right. Your big wreck in '54. Doc: They quit on me. When I finally got put together, I went back expecting a big welcome. You know what they said? "You're history". Moved right on to the next rookie standing in line. There was a lot left in me. I never got chance to show 'em. I keep that, to remind me never to go back. I just never expected that that world would...would find me here. McQueen: Hey, look, Doc, I'm not them. Doc: Oh, yeah? McQueen: No, I'm not. Doc: When is the last time you cared about something except yourself, hot rod? You name me one time. And I will take it all back. Ahhuh? I didn't think so. These are good folk around here, who care about one another. I don't want 'em depending on someone they can't count on. McQueen: Oh, like you? You've been here how long and your friends don't even know who you are? Who's caring about only himself? Doc: Just finish that road and get outta here! sarge: Will you turn that disrespectful junk off? Filmore: Respect the classics, man. Mater: He's done. He must've finished it while we was all sleepin'. Doc: Good riddance. Flo: He's gone? Sarge: Well, we wouldn't want him to miss that race of his. Sheriff: Hisk...hisk. Ramone: Oh, dude, are you crying? Sheriff: No! I'm happy! I don't have to watch him every second of the day anymore! I'm glad he's gone! Red: Hahaha. McQueen: What's wrong with Red? Mater: Oh, he's just sad 'cause you left town, and went to your big race to win the Piston Cup that you've always dreamed about your whole life and get that big ol' sponsor and that fancy helicopter you was talkin' about. Mater: Huuhh! Wait a minute! Folks: Hahaha. Mater: I knowed you wouldn't leave without saying goodbye. McQueen: Hahaha. Sheriff: What are you doin' here, son? You're gonna miss your race. Don't worry. I'll give you a police escort, and we'll make up the time. McQueen: Thank you, Sheriff. But you know I can't go just yet. Sheriff: Well, why not? McQueen: I'm not sure these tires...can get me all the way to California. Yeah, does anybody know what time Luigi's opens? Luigi: Ah..haha! I can't-a believe it! Luigi: Four new tires! Grazien, Mr. Lightning. Grazien! Flo: Would you look at that! Luigi: Our first real customers in years! I am filled with tears of ecstacy, for this is the most glorious day of my life! McQueen: All right, Luigi, give me the best set of blackwalls you've got. Luigi: No,no,no,no! You don't-a know what you want. Luigi know what you want. Blackwall tires. They blend into the pavement. But-a this...white-wall tires! They say, "Look at me! Here I am! Love me." McQueen: All right, you're the expert. Luigi: Eh, hehehee! McQueen: Oh, and don't forget the spare. Luigi: Perfetto. Guido! Guido: Peet stop! Song Luigi: Hahaha! What did Luigi tell you, aey? McQueen: Wow, you were right. Better than a Ferrari, huh? Luigi: Aaa, No. McQueen: Wow! This organic fuel is great! Why haven't I heard about it before? Filmore: It's a conspiracy, man! The oil companies got a grip on the government! They're feedin' us a bunch of lies, man. McQueen: OK, I'll take a case. Ramone: Ahh.. Yeah. Ka-chow. Mater: Here she comes! McQueen: Places, everybody. Hurry! Act natural. Folks: Hi, Sally. Sally: All right, what's goin' on? Mater: Ladies and gentlecars, please welcome the neeewww Lightning McQueen! McQueen: What do you think? Radiator Springs looks pretty good on me. Sally: I'll say. Rrr. Ka-chow. You're gonna fit right in in California. Oh my goodness. It looks like you've helped everybody in town. McQueen: Yeah, everybody except one. Hey, is it getting dark out? Lizzie: What? What'd he say? McQueen: Let me say that again. Is it getting dark out? Lizzie: Now, what was I supposed to do after that? Song Sally: They fixed their neon. Flo: Low and slow? Ramone: Oh, yeah, baby! McQueen: Just like in its heyday, right? Sally: It's even better than I pictured it. Thank you. McQueen: Shall we cruise? Lizzie: Oh, thank you, dear. I'd love to! McQueen: No,no,no. Sally: Lizzie! Lizzie: I remember when Stanley first asked me to take a drive with him. Mater: Hey, Miss sally. May I have this cruise? Sally: Of course, Mater. Sheriff: A,a,ah! Lizzie: ...and again and I said, "No," and he asked me again, and I said, "No." But, oh, he was a persistent little burger for a two-cylinder. Finally I said, "All right, one little drive." Mater: Hahaha. McQueen: Hey! Sally: Thanks, Mater. Mater: Good evenin', you two. Lizzie: Oh, Stanley, I wish you could see this. Flo: Is that what I think it is? Sally: Oh, I don't know, Flo. I haven't had a chance to find out. But I am going to find out. Hello. Flo: Not that. That. Sally: Huh. Customers? Flo: Customers, everybody! And a lot of 'em! You know what to do. Just like we rehearsed. Mater: It's the ghostlight! Helicopter: We have found McQueen. We have found McQueen! Cameramen: McQueen, over here! McQueen: Aaa, wait, excuse me. Cameramen: Is it true you've been in rehab? Cameramen: Did you have a nervous breakdown, McQueen. McQueen: I'm sorry, what? Cameramen: McQueen's wearing whitewalls! Cameramen: Are the tires you wearing are turning balding? Sally: Stickers, McQueen! Cameramen: Was Lightning McQueen your prisoner? Mater: Shoot, no! We're best buds! I ain't braggin' or nothin', but I was in charge of huntin' him down if he tried to escape. McQueen: Sally, Sally! Kori: McQueen! Will you still race for the Piston Cup? Sally: Stickers? McQueen: Sally! Cameramen: Come on, give us some bolt! Mack: You're here! Thank the manufacturer! You're alive! McQueen: Mack? Mack: You're here! I can't belive it! Oh, hoho. You are a sight for some headlights! I'm so sorry I lost you, boss. I'll make it up to you! McQueen: Mack, I, I can't belive you're here. Harv: Is that the world's fastest racing machine? McQueen: Is that Harv? Mack: Yeah. He's in the back. Cameramen: Show us the bolt, McQueen! Mack: Get back, you oil-thirsty parasites! Cameramen: Hey, where's the old McQueen? Mack: Actually, this is my good side here. Cameramen: Show us the bolt! McQueen: Harv! Harv! Cameramen: Give us the bolt! McQueen: Harv? Cameramen: Come on! Harv: Kid, I'm over here! McQueen: How you doin', buddy? Harv: My star client disappears off the face of the earth! How do you think I'm doing? McQueen: Harv, I can explain. Harv: I'm doing great! You're everywhere, baby! Radio, TV, the papers! You can't buy this kind of publicity! What do you need me for? That's just a figure of speech, by the way. You signed a contract. Where are you? I can't even find you on my GPS. McQueen: I'm in this little town called Radiator Springs. You know Route 66? It's still here! Harv: Yeah, that's great, kid. Playtime is over, pal. While the world's been trying to find you, Dinoco has had no one to woo. Who are they gonna woo? McQueen: Chick! Harv: Bingo. In fact, check out what's on the plasma right now. Cameramen: Show us the thunder! Chick: You want thunder? You want thunder? Ka-chicka, ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! McQueen: Hey, that's my bit! Harv: You've gotta get to Cali, pronto! Just get out of Radiation Stinks now, or Dinoco is history, you hear me? McQueen: Just give me a second here, Harv. Harv: No,no,no, wait. Where are goin'. Get in the trailer, baby. Kid! You want, you want a bigger trailer? McQueen: Sally, I...I want you to... Look, I wish...Ahhhh. Sally: Thank you. Thanks for everything. McQueen: Ah. Haha. It just a road. Sally: No. It was much more than that. Mack: Hey, kid! We gotta go. Harv's goin' crazy! He's gonna have me fired if I don't get you in the truck right now! McQueen: Mack, just... hold it for... Sally: You should go. McQueen: I know, but... Sally: Good luck in California. I hope you find what you're looking for. Cameramen: McQueen, come on! McQueen: Sally! Cameramen: Show us the bolt, McQueen! The bolt! Hey, Lightning, show us the bolt! Cameramen: Where's the old McQueen? Harv: Come on, get in the trailer. That's it. That's right kid, let's go! You're a big shining star. You're a superstar. You don't belong there, anyway. McQueen: Whoa... Wait...Whoa,whoa,wait,wait! Cameramen: Hey, guys! McQueen's leavin' in the truck! Kori: Hey, are you Doc Hudson? Doc: Yeah. Kori: Thanks for the call. Sally: You called them? Doc: It's best for everyone, Sally. Sally: Best for everyone, or best for you? Mater: I didn't get to say goodbye to him. Bob: Hello, race fans, and welcome to what has become, quite simply, the biggest event in the history of racing. A three way battle for the Piston Cup! Darrell: There's a crowd of nearly 200,000 cars here at the Los Angeles International Speedway. Tickets to this race are hotter than a black leather seat on a hot summer day! Bob: The King, Chick Hicks and Lightning McQueen in a 200 laps, winner-takes-all, tiebreaker race. Darrell: You know I got a lotta miles on me, but let me tell you somethin' buddy. I never thought I'd see anything like this. Wow! Man. This is exciting! Bob: In fact, the country has almost shut down, to watch what many experts are calling "the race of the century." Junior: Hey, King! Good luck in your last race. You've sure been an inspiration to me. The King: Thanks, Junior. Appreciate it. Dear: Hey, be careful out there, OK? The King: Yeah, mam. Mia: He's hot. Chick: Wanna know the forecast? I'll give you the forecast. A 100 percent chance of thunder! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Say it with me! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Security: Hey, you! No admittance without a garage pass. Fred: Oh, it's OK. Lightning McQueen knows me! Andretti: Hey, Marco, it's a beautiful day for a race, isn't it? Security: Absolutely, Mr. Andretti. Andretti: And good morning to you, Fred. Fred: Mario Andretti he knows my name! You gotta let me in now! Security: Sorry, pal. McQueen: OK, here we go. Focus. Speed. I am speed. Victory, one winner, two losers. Speed. Speed. Speed. Speed... Mack: Hey, Lightnin'! You ready? McQueen: Yeah, yeah, yeah! I'm...I'm ready. McQueen: Mack, thanks for being my pit crew today. Mack: Nahh. Don't worry about it, kid. It's the least I could do. After all, "Gas Can" is my middle name. McQueen: It is? Mack: Nahh, not really. Small aeroplane: A. O. TV Crew: Nelson! Zoom in. Ready, 16? Take 16. Bob: And there he is, Lightning McQueen! Missing all week, and then he turns up in the middle of nowhere! In a little town called Radiator Springs. Darrell: Wearin' whitewall tires, of all things. Chick: Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Hahaha. Hey, where you been? I've been kinda lonely. Nobody to hang out with. I mean, except the Dinoco folks. Ohhh and the twins. Of course. You know the twins the one that used to be your fans, but now they're my fans. Anyway, listen to what the twins think... McQueen: Ahh. Shoot! Fans: Boogity, boogity, boogity, boys! Let's go racin'! Dear: Come on, you can do it! Tex: Come on kid, make us proud, boy! Bob: Fifty laps down, and The King is still holding a slim lead. Darrell: Hey, McQueen's got a run on him! He's lookin' to the inside! Ohh! Chick slammed the door on him! Bob: Chick's not making it easy on him today. Darrell: Oh, man, he lost so much momentum, and now he's gonna have to chase him back down! Bob: Ohhh, McQueen spins out in the infield! Chick: Hahaha! Just me and the old man, fellas. McQueen just doesn't have it today. Mack: Hey, kid, are you all right? McQueen: I don't know, Mack. I..I... I don't think I... Doc: I didn't come all this way to see you quit. McQueen: Doc? Guys: Yey.. Hahaha. McQueen: Guys, you're here! I can't believe this! Doc: I knew you needed a crew chief, but I didn't know it was this bad. McQueen: I thought you said you'd never come back. Doc: Well, I really didn't have a choice. Mater didn't get to say goodbye. Mater: Goodbye!! Okay, I'm good. McQueen: Hahaha! Doc: All right, if you can drive as good as you fix a road, then you can win this race with you eyes shut. Now, get back out there! Hot snot, we are back in business! Guido! Luigi! You're goin' up against professional pit crews boys, you're gonna have to be fast. Luigi: They will not know what bit them! Doc: Kid, you can beat these guys. Find a groove that works for you and get that lap back. Chick's Crew: Is that? Chick's Crew: Oh, wow. That's him! TV Crew: Is that...? That's the Hudson Hornet! Bob, Darrell! The Hudson Hornet's back! Bob: Darrell, it appears McQueen has got himself a pit crew. And look who he has for a crew chief! Fans: Wow... Look, man. It's the Hudson Hornet! Biggest fan: Whoa!! Fans: Well, dip me in axle grease and call me Slick! It surely is. Biggest fan: Hahahahaha! Bob: Wow, this is history in the making. Nobody has seen the racing legend in over 50 years! Lizzie: Hey, Doc! Come look at the fellow on the radio. He looks just like you. Bob: McQueen passes them on the inside! Darrell: But he's still nearly a lap fail. Bob: Can he catch up to them with only 60 laps to go? Doc: You're goin' great, kid. Just keep your head on. Guido: Vai! Vai! Vai,vai! Chick's crew: Hey, shrimpie, where did McQueen find you, huh? Those round things are called tires, and they go under the car! All Chick's Crew: Hahahahaha!!! Guido: Con chi credi di parlare? Ma, con chi stai parlando? Luigi: No! No, no! You'll have your chance. You will have your chance. Chick: Oh, kid's just tryin' to be a hero, huh? Well, what do you think of this? Yeah, that's it kid. Whats?? Mater: Whoa! Git-R-done! Hahaha! I taught him that. Ka-chow! Chick Crew: Auuww! Bob: What a move by McQueen! He's caught up to the leaders. Darrell: Oh, yeah. This is what it's all about. A three-way battle for the lead, with ten to go. Tex: Hahaha! Look at that boy go out there! Chick: No, you don't. McQueen: Doc, I'm flat! I'm flat! Doc: Can you get back to the pits? McQueen: Yeah, yeah. I think so. Doc: Hey, got a yellow. Bring it in. Don't tear yourself up, kid. Mack: We gotta get him back out there fast or we're gonna be a lap down, and we'll never win this race! Doc: Guido! It's time. Chick Crew: Hey, tiny, you gonna clean his windshield? Hahaha! Darrell: I don't believe it! Bob: That was the fastest pit stop I've ever seen! Darrell: It was a great stop, but he's still gotta beat that pace car out! Bob: It's gonna be close. Mater: Yeah!! Biggest Fan: Yeah, baby!! Fans: Yeah... Hahaha! Darrell: Yeah!! He's back in the race! Guido: Peet stop. Luigi: Guido, you did it! Mater: Way to go, Guido! Ramone: Yeah!! Bob: This is it. We're heading into the final lap and McQueen is right behind the leaders. What a comeback! Darrell: A hundred and ninety-nine laps, and, baby, it all comes down to this! Doc: This is it, kiddo. You've got four turns left. One at a time. Drive it in deep and hope it sticks. Go! Chick: We'll see about that! Bob: McQueen's going inside! Bob: Chick and The King are loose! Darrell: I think McQueen is out of the race! Darrell: McQueen saved it! Bob: He's back on the track! Doc: Float like a Cadillac... McQueen: Sting like a Beemer! Biggest Fan: Ka-chow, ka-chow, ka-chow! Fans: Wooowww! Folks: Yeeehaaaa! Hahaha. Darrell: Lightning McQueen is gonna win the Piston Cup! Sally: Come on! You got it! You got it, Stickers! Chick: I am not comin' in behind you again, old man. Dear: Oh, no! Chick: Yeah... Woooww! I won, baby! Yeah! Oh, yeah! Flo: What's he up to, Doc? The King: What are you doin', kid? McQueen: I think The King should finish his last race. The King: You just gave up the Piston Cup, you know that? McQueen: Ahhh. This grumpy old racecar I know once told me somethin'. It's just an empty cup. Bob: Darrell, is pushing on the last lap legal? Darrell: Hey, man. He's not really pushin' him. He's just givin' him a little bump draft. Chick: Whoaa.. Hohooo!! Hey. What? What's goin' on? Fan: That's what I call racin' right there. Tex: Hahaha! Luigi: Bravo il mio amico! Mater: Way to go, buddy! Filmore: There's a lotta love out there, you know, man? Sarge: Don't embarrass me, Filmore. Lizzie: That's my hot rod. Chick: Come on, baby, bring it out! Bring out the Piston Cup! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Yeah! Now, that's what I'm talkin' about! Hey, how come I'm the only one celebrating is me, huh? Where are the girls? Bring on the confetti! Auuww! Auuww! Easy with the confetti. What's goin' on? Come on, snap some pictures. I gotta go sign my deal with Dinoco! Ka-chicka! Say it with me. Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Cameramen: Booo! Mia & Tia: Booo! Chick: What's wrong with everybody? Where's the happiness? Hey! This is the start of the Chick era! Dear: Thanks, Lightnin'. McQueen: You're welcome. Fan: Way to go, King! Fan: You're still the car! Biggest Fan: You're The King! Yeah! Rust-eze Folks: Yeah! Hahahaha! Mack: Wahh! Hoo! Rust-eze Car: You make us proud, kid! Mack: Congrats on the loss, me bucko! Doc: You got a lotta of stuff, kid. McQueen: Thanks, Doc. Tex: Hey, Lightnin'. How 'bout comin' over here and talk to me a minute? Son, that was some real racin' out there. How'd you like to become the new face of Dinoco? McQueen: But I didn't win. Tex: Lightnin', there's a whole lot more to racin' than just winnin'. Rust-eze Van: He was so rusty, when he drove down the street. Hahaha. Buzzards used to circle the car! Folks: Hahahaha. McQueen: Thank, you, Mr. Tex, but...but these Rust-eze guys over there gave me my big break. I'm gonna stick with them. Tex: Well, I sure can respect that. Still, you know, if there's ever anything I can do for you, just let me know. McQueen: I sure appreciate that. Thank you. Actually, there is one thing. Mater: Whoah! Hoo! Aaaa! Hey look at me! I'm flyin', by golly! Whoahh! Hoo! I'm happier than a tornado in a trailer park! Luigi: I think it's about-a time we redecorate. Michael Schumacker: Chow! Hi, Lightning McQueen told me this was the best place in the world to get tires. How 'bout setting me and my friends up with three or four sets each? Luigi: Huh. Guido! There is a real Michael Schumacker Ferrari in my store. A real Ferrari! Punch me, Guido. Punch me in the face. This is the most glorious day of my life. Michael Schumacker: Wow. Spero che il tuo amico si riprenda. Mi dicono che siete fantastici. Sally: Uh..huh!. Hahaha. Just passin' through? McQueen: Actually, I thought I'd stop and stay awhile. I hear this place is back on the map. Sally: It is? McQueen: Yeah, there's some rumor floating around that some hotshot Piston Cup racecar is setting up his big racing headquarters here. Sally: Really? Well, there goes the town. McQueen: You know, I really missed you, Sally. Sally: Well, I create feelings in others they themselves don't understand and, blah, blah, blah, blah. McQueen: Hahaha. Mater: McQueen and Sally parked beneath the tree, K-i-s-s...i-n-t! McQueen: Great timing, Mater! Mater: Hep-non, hip-hep, hi-li-lilly! Weeeee!! McQueen: He's my best friend. What're you gonna do? Sally: So, Stickers, last one to Flo's buys? McQueen: I don't know. Why don't we just take a drive? Sally: Mmm. Nahh. McQueen: Yeah! Ka-chow! Mater: Yeeeehoooo!!!!! Song

the entire script of cars (2006)

#you're welcome #cars #mine

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everyonesomething · 8 years ago

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Session Fourteen

Edith Runekill: "...hope there's not another kraken down there."

Malkas: "Unlikely,"

Pepper "What if it was right behind you?" and mage hand grabs Edith's shoulder.

Edith Runekill jumps a foot in the air

Edith Runekill and falls into the aisle

Edith Runekill and starts hyperventilating

Malkas: "Pepper!"

"It's okay, Edi, it's just Pepper being an ass."

Pepper: "No, it's really an itty bitty kraken in the traincar."

In this session we get some new toys and a new plan of attack.

The set-up: We've made our way to Baldur's Gate, finally.

The Game: We've been transferred to a new train to finish the journey to Baldur's Gate, Edith and Grim fill the time by discussing theology.

Grim: "How come Auril? You don't mind the question."

Grim: "Don't seem much like you."

Edith Runekill: "It's just... what our people do. We weren't always farmers; if you go way, way back, we were pirates, raiders, sailors; scourges of the North an' all that."

"That was a long time ago, but Illuskans weren't always farming folk."

"But... the one thing the old way and the new way had in common... is that winter is long, and cold, and hard."

"So we worship Auril so our crops make it to the spring. And, well, so we make it, too."

Grim nods

Edith Runekill: "And it's just what I used to, even if now I live somewhere where it's never winter."

Grim: "You got a real penchant for the traditional, huh"

Malkas makes a face like "hahaha no"

Edith Runekill: "I guess so. I mean. I haven't exactly lived a traditional life. There's a reason I left. But... I respect old things, I respect the history behind 'em. And, well, they're still my people, even if I've left."

Grim nods again

Edith Runekill: "But if I were really traditional I'd be a farm wife or something by now. Not really the life for me."

Grim: "Right."

Edith Runekill turns back to Grim. "Do... do you worship anyone? If you don't mind me asking. I'd understand if you don't wanna talk about it."

Grim shrugs

Grim: "Sure."

"Ilmater, god of enduring the worst this world's got to throw at you."

Edith Runekill smiles. "Makes sense. Good god for the sorta things we been going through lately."

Grim nods

Grim: "If someone's gotta hold out for the sake of everyone else, may's well be someone with nothing to lose."

Edith Runekill: "Difference with worshipping Auril is she's the one throwing the things at you, and you're praying to her to please stop for a while."

Malkas: "A little like the church of Asmodeus."

Grim: "Never been one for bargaining with the enemy."

Edith Runekill: "So, uh, you always worship Ilmater, or did you come to him later on?"

Grim shrugs

Grim: "Hard to know."

Edith Runekill: "Thin line between the two, I guess."

Grim: "Don't remember much of my early years, truth be told."

Grim: "Could've worshipped the tarrasque f'r all I know."

Edith Runekill looks concerned. "D...did something happen?"

Grim shrugs again

Grim: "So I heard."

Edith Runekill: "Sorry."

"Didn't mean to pry..."

Grim: "No apologies, like I said I don't remember the most of it."

"As best I know, there was some kind've a fire in my hometown."

"Bounty hunters picked me up, that's all I got."

Edith Runekill: "Oh..."

Malkas has never felt more awkward.

Grim smokes

Edith Runekill: "Sorry..." Edith says, to everyone and no one in particular.

Grim: "What you sorry for now?"

Pepper eats, this doesn't really crack the top 10 of her awkward experiences but that doesn't mean it's fun.

Edith Runekill: "I dunno. Just... sorry you had to go through that? But. That's maybe not really what you want to hear."

Grim: "Ilmater says everything you go through is for a reason. Reason being, nobody else has got to weather it."

Edith gives the group a small pep talk about the importance of finding the lich—almost being eaten by a kraken puts things in perspective that way. She's still determined to hunt him down and vows to do her best and not die before then. Pepper tries to lighten the mood by scaring the bejeezus beauril out of Edith, but it goes over about as well as you'd expect it to with someone who was almost fish food.

Pepper and Edith then talk language and literature.

Edith Runekill: "[Elvish] My mother would've never actually come out and said that; she would have artfully conveyed it by choosing exactly the right sort of silence or a precisely calibrated frown or closing a door just short of a slam."

Pepper stares for a second and busts a gut laughing.

Edith Runekill: "Was... was my accent wrong?"

Pepper: "Who taught you Elvish? You sound like my grandma."

Malkas is hopelessly confused.

Edith Runekill: "Well, we learned a really formal register of speech at the university..."

"And since then I mostly been reading ancient texts in Elven, not having friendly chats."

"Also the professor was probably old enough to be your grandma."

"So."

Malkas has dozed off.

Edith Runekill: "So when I try to use it conversationally it's a bit... uh..."

"Well. You heard."

Pepper: "Oh the stories Gran told. [Extremely old Elvish accent] Come children, willst thou gather and hear of the dark days of yore, before zero was invented."

Edith Runekill: "But with me it's all [Elvish] 'I seek to return home but my bones are weary; I shall walk no more. If you please, show me where I can embark on an omnibus to convey me onwards."

"When I just wanna say, hey, where's the bus stop."

Pepper shrugs, "I could point you to some pulp stories to help, but like I said I don't think our tastes match up."

Edith Runekill: "You'd be surprised by the kinda things I read for leisure. I can't be on all the time, y'know?"

"It's not always ancient tomes of poems in dead languages."

Pepper ticks titles off on her fingers, "[Elvish] Well there's 'Help, I Have No Head', 'My Family's Turned Into Cannibals', 'Guillotine, Guillotine, Guillotine'..."

We get to Baldur's Gate and are greeted with a hero's welcome. Literally! The mayor has put together a press conference to thank us for our service in Kraken eradication. We snap a few pictures and Sydney and her gumshoes are formally welcomed to the city.

And into the back of a squad car.

But it's a good ride to a police station, we're getting rewarded for our services! And also they want us to check out Candlekeep: an ancient, warded-off library where children of Ba'al used to be raised. The wards are down and they've noticed activity around it, but all their usual adventurers are still in Tarrasque country so would we do them the favor of checking it out?

Of course we will.

In exchange, they give our weapons a magical boost and let us take something fun from the evidence locker.

Grim – The Punisher: Rifle scope that grants a bonus and advantage to attacks, but only if the user makes a pun.

Edith – The Living Grimoire: Allows an extra spell regardless of class to be prepared each day. Looks like a small cat.

Sydney – Hookshot: Allows the user to make a ranged melee shot to attack or to latch on to a surface and rappel forward.

Pepper – Cool Sunglasses: Advantage on deception and persuasion checks against anyone uncool. Also makes her look extra cool.

Mal – Rapier: Gives extra damage on a successful attack.

We make plans with the police force to head out the next day, but for now we retire to our all-expenses-paid fancy hotel suites. Easily the nicest place we’ve been on the whole trip: huge bathrooms, plush furnishings, each room even has a piano! We're living large, baby.

#previously on #summary #neverwinter 1933

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chasingeast · 5 years ago

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Day 53- 7:37 P.M., Tuesday, February 11, 2020

Now that it’s been over 50 days of this new process, hopefully some new habits are beginning to form to support better things.

I’ve been journaling more often which is a plus. I’ve always loved to journal to get my thoughts out. I just always struggled with choosing the correct medium that would work for me. Traditionally, I would write in a notebook and my handwriting would be a hit or miss. I would get tired after a while. It would take me ages to get out what I needed to write due to the fact that my hand would always tire after a short period of time. Typing is effortless. It doesn’t tire out my fingers. In fact, I could probably go on endlessly until my eyes tire from screen fatigue. I’m not sure if that’s what I’m feeling now or if I’m just generally really sleepy. I am sitting up rather sloppily against my dresser which is flushed against my bed. My eyes are getting droopy but I’m not sure if it’s because the end of the day is drawing near or I’m just feeling comfortable. My toes are definitely not agreeing with the rest of my body. Each little digit is icy cold and frozen. I’m trying to warm them up by simply tucking them under my legs even though it doesn’t seem to be working.

I am keeping track of how many days have passed since I first started my new resolutions. I am also keeping track of all the things I’ve done in the meantime to work on these resolutions. I do notice that I did spend a majority of these posts hoping and longing for someone. Even though I still feel that way, I won’t be able to improve myself if I don’t spend more time working on deeper topics if I’m always stuck at the surface.

These new found resolutions were established to help me get a better understanding of myself in order to make the necessary adjustments I need to continue moving forward. I know that I’ve come to a point in my life where I can no longer stay standing. I must move forward. My parents provide me with a comfortable home. I truly have no worries or concerns. I have no need to drown my sorrows in bills or payments to survive the week. It’s just not something I have to worry about. I also know that that’s a situation that will come to an end. Could I ride it out until the end? Certainly. I probably wouldn’t save any money from it anyway so it’s really just money better spent elsewhere. I’ve been putting in the time and effort to look into different rental units. The overall consensus is that nothing is cheap. Everything is expensive and I wonder how I’ll ever be able to afford anything. One of the biggest calculations I tried to consider was how much I could realistically save and how much I could spend freely. It’s not much. If I count my overall savings in terms of long-term planning then I could be in a good spot. I’m not saving all that much each year, however, between the amount I have put towards my two retirement funds, that equals 30% of my salary. I’ll at least have a minimum amount to begin with. On the other hand, the amount of money that I’d have remaining to use for other forms of savings would be very limited unless I decide to take on other jobs. I will probably need to do so in order to have money for the things I want without having a credit card statement that charges interest fees. I admit that I spend a great deal of money each month. I’m trying very hard to curb my spendings but it’s not easy. I just love to swipe my card. It’s this incredible form of power that is not accessible by any other logical means. I mean I have power at work- I’m responsible for all these little humans, but that’s different. I love to spend money. I just wonder if I’m able to stick within a budget.

I have a certain amount set aside for “savings”, “vacationing”, and other expenses. At the moment it’s a luxury to be able to plan like that. In the future, I don’t know that it’d be possible to plan for vacations unless I was cutting back my budget as is. At least, going back to the feeling of luxury, I have the ability to safely and leisurely test my boundaries. I wonder if I enjoyed more solitude and video games then I too would be able to cut back on my expenses in general. It’s probably best because that also means less plastic consumption and waste in general. I plan on trying to practice cutting back for as long as possible in order to see if I can truly maintain this time of lifestyle.

When I was younger I never knew what type of life I wanted. The only vision I had in the forefront was to survive college and to get a job once college spit me out into the “real world.” I never planned for a life after getting a job. It seemed to already be such a difficult task. I didn’t know if there was a life after that. Now that I am finally in a time and place where it’s appropriate to address these topics, as well as having the openness and readiness to learn about them, I have a clearer idea of what I hope to see. It’s not too far fetched from an idea that a thought process that I developed back in college. In college, I wanted to surround myself with the people that I care about. I wanted to spend my time with those I value and cherish the most. Post college I wanted adventure. I wanted to face every moment and experience every thrill to the last drop. I never wanted to sit still and was constantly on the move. I would not slow down for anyone or anything. Now, years later, I find that my wants and desires have fused together. I still want to spend time with those I cherish, but even more so I want a reason to work hard for something everyday. I want a reason to come home and be home. That doesn’t necessarily mean a person, though I would love to have someone that I’m working towards building a relationship with. I get attached easily. I love spending all my time, energy, and effort towards one incredible source. I would rather do that than to go back to sprinkling a piece of me everywhere for the affection to never truly be reciprocated. I love love. I love being loved. I love loving someone. I don’t think I’ve necessarily given up, I just don’t like the methods I have to use. I don’t have anything against online dating. I think it’s one of the more common ways to go about finding a partner in this day and age, especially considering the fact that I don’t exactly spend all my time out and about the town and bumping into people all that often. It would honestly be the only interaction I could get that would be purposeful. I just don’t want it to be like that. I know myself enough. I don’t flaunt myself well. I also don’t really have an interest in doing so. I’m fun loving, kind, and sweet but I have a thirst for adventure and thrills. I feed off of human interactions and physical presence. I need to know that I get these rushed butterfly feelings that last for more than a few seconds. It needs to infiltrate every crack and crevice. I want someone to make me blush. I want to be awestruck by someone. I want to laugh wholeheartedly and roll my eyes at the silliness of something. I just want more. I don’t know how to get more, but I promise that I will find it.

I was asked today why I’m not acting myself. What they meant by “acting myself” was why I wasn’t exploring the world or hiking every possible track out there. I’m not by any means trying to avoid nature. I just haven’t felt inclined to go. I still love it. I still look up photos. I still read articles about the outdoor conditions and check in with my favorite social media posts. I just don’t feel obligated to put myself out there. I’ve been directing my energy towards other things and I don’t necessarily see that as being a bad thing. It’s just different. I would really just love to get out and see everything around me. Though I may say that, even now I don’t go out and about. I haven’t gone outside to walk around other towns. I want to. I want to explore other places. I have actually been itching to get back on my bike. I’m considering fixing it this weekend so I can make use of it on the couple days off for President’s Day. I don’t know where I’ll bike. Maybe I’ll drive around and stop at a park to bike around. I haven’t come to a decision yet. I just want to be able to get out and about. I want to see what’s around me. I want to appreciate every little thing and everything I’m surrounded by. I am still very much myself. I just have other parts to me. I know I had gotten into a habit of labeling and categorizing myself. I want to be more than just “the girl that goes hiking.” I don’t need a label. I just want to be myself.

I want a simple life. Well, I would love to live a lavish lifestyle but I know that I’ll never be able to afford one. I could never afford much on my own. I would probably forever live paycheck to paycheck unless I find other means to improve upon. Even if I did end up having a very simple lifestyle, I wouldn’t mind. I know how to find ways to occupy my time. Taking pictures of different sights. Driving to find new locations. They’re all very important things to me. I think everything is very much doable. It’s just a matter of whether or not I’m open to it. I guess that’s also one of the big reasons why I’m pushing myself to truly plan for a life moving forward. I’ve lived such a privileged life free of responsibilities. That time will come to an end. It’s not a negative thing. It’s just a matter of reality and accepting it. Is it the most fulfilling at times? Probably not. But it’s a lifestyle. I just hope that I can provide myself with the type of life that I want. I’m just hoping at the very least I can have the furniture I want. Hahaha. I do think I’ll make it. I definitely think that I’ll survive. It’s just a matter of getting started. Maybe also study a few things to educate myself a little more as well. Don’t just drown myself in social media all the time. Do something a little more productive.

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miniliew-blog · 5 years ago

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Date: Dec 16, 2019

We have a hard time to wake up. May be because we were too tired the day before. So, we just bearly make it to the breakfast cut off time. Hahaha.

The food is simple. But enough for us to eat.

Wow, the restaurant selling Tottori crab. I have never seen crabs has so many black dots. This is the marker of Tottori crab.

龙见台

We start our journey by driving out towards the Sand Dunes direction. It will takes 1 hour to go to that place.

The first stop we stopped is 龙见台. It’s a beach, that has a car park and a coffee restaurant.

It is always fantastic feeling to see a beach.

As usual, Kay does not like direct sun light. So, he uses his camel that he just bought at one of the highway stopover to cover his eyes.

I also wanted to take a picture here.

This is the place and the landmark.

Look at the sky. So blue. So, hopefully tonight has better luck to see the stars. Later at night, I was wrong. The clouds came in so fast and covered the whole sky around 9pm.

Let’s see what we can do here.

Let’s sky jump.

Here is the series of sky jump photos we took, and it is fantastic.

These are memorable photos. For me and the kids.

Kay Kay is flying.

Now, it is both the kids turns.

Let’s take a group photo.

Jay Jay flying.

I am lifting off. Naturally.

I am doing funny jump pose.

I am flying again un-naturally.

I am running in the thin air.

How about this, sticking my tongue out. This is fun!

We end up eating ice cream and drinking coffee here at the only coffee restaurant here.

White Rabbit Beach & The Surfers

We then reach another beach. White Rabbit beach. 白兔海滩。

And welcome Kay Kay in the picture. He is back facing the sun. That is why he can open his eyes.

It is a very nice sandy beach.

I made them sky jump, but the effect not so good. Using my iPhone to do the job.

Spotted a surfer here. Not come meh???

Oh, there are two more surfers in the water.

They were in the water for long time. And they try to catch the wave. And finally, he made it.

Most of the time, he just body surfing.

And here the go out to the sea again.

Finally they retired the surf and go back to the car park. Smoking and resting. So, they are the surfer yuppee I suppose.

Love the seas.

Love the bokeh. I am glad that I brought along my trusted 100-400mm telephoto lens.

Why do you think I can take very close up shots of the surfers. Of course using maximum zoom, the only regret is I forgot to bring my x2 adapter. hahaha

Jay and the Sands.

Jay and the sea.

The back shot.

Kay Kay throwing a rock into the sea.

And the rock leaves his hand.

This trip we taken a lot of nice photos. I am satisfy with that.

Kay Kay running on the beach.

It’s my turn. I asked my wife to take the shot.

Not too bad too.

One more.

Let’s take a photo of my wife too.

White Rabbit Shrine

Opposite the beach is the car park. Beside the car park is the White Rabbit Shrine.

Why this shrine is there.

As this is the sand dune area. So there is a sand sculpture here too.

Every where you can see the rabbit stone statue.

This is a nice pose.

A nice picture for the three of them.

There is a place for you to wash hand, pray and drink the holly clear stream water.

Quite nice to drink.

There are instruction to teach you how to drink.

There is this pond here too. In Chinese it says no gain no minus pond. Does it mean the water here always at the same water level?

Our first shrine to pay respect. Bow two times, throw the donations coins, bow again, and pull the bell.

Here is how Kay Kay did it. And he forgot the bow before shaking the bell. hahaha

Don’t forget to buy the good luck charm and the study hard charm. And the accident free charm.

Love the reflection of the pond.

Here is the reason why we are here.

But I did not take very good starry night photo yesterday because of the clouds.

There are so m any places you can see good starry sky in this province.

Really fantastic. I wish I can stay here few more days.

Let’s hold hand and say buy buy to White Rabbit Shrine.

Sand Dune Art Museum

We continue our journey. That is why I said, renting a car is so fun and so good. Because you can see more things.

And we are finally here. We have not eaten. But let’s visit the museum first.

This is a fantastic museum. They have different exhibit every year.

This is a nice pose.

All the sand sculpture is done by these international team. Wow. A lot of hard work.

Sand Sculpture of South Asians is 2019 theme.

This Gandhi sand sculpture is done by this Russian Mr. Pavel Mylinkov. It looks so real.

Wow.

Wow. Look at the 3D effect of the building.

This is amazing.

I cannot believe all these were done using sands.

Wow.

It is really amazing.

My kids also cannot believe and wonder how they sculpture it.

Just look at the 3D effect of the town and roads.

More zoom in.

The facial expression is so nicely done.

The whole walls.

Even the painting on the wall are done using layers of sands.

The details of the building is sculptured using sands.

I like this one too.

It looks so real.

The city.

Look at the detail sculpture.

Some Indian figures.

Look at the face.

Lotus three face buddhas.

Just look at the eye lid.

Jay is amazed with all these.

The army.

The building. Wow!

How much time they spent to do this???

Zoom in more.

Smile or sad?

So amazing.

Elephant rider.

The temple.

The buddha.

Wow.

The apprentices.

Taking picture with the sand buddha.

Sleeping Buddha.

The followers.

The monks.

The statue. I am sure the real thing also look similar to this.

Taj Mahal?

Nice eyes.

Unbelievable face.

Another look at the street. In 3D mode.

Some maharajah.

Some beast?

Some goddess?

Another goddess?

The stairs

Animal kingdom.

This is how massive the studio.

bathing?

Elephant god?

Me and Gandhi behind.

Me and Jay.

From the second floor view. There are photos of all the past 20 years sand sculpture theme too.

They also have outdoor sand sculpture too.

But because there are winds and rain. So, they have to cover it up. And the sculpture are not that nice.

Here we can see the sand dunes. Behind them is the sand dunes.

Is just dessert. A very small one.

Let’s take the sand dunes picture.

Some outdoor one is nice.

The tour ended at the Bell of Happiness.

Ya, ring the bell, Kay!

Lunch Time Just opposite the Museum

We have our lunch just opposite the museum. A fresh seafood don place.

Cheers.

Fabulous food. Fresh and nice.

Let’s take a photo here.

Its Good!

Camel Ride

Across the road is the sand dune. Basically it is dessert, a very small one with some dunes.

Kind of strange to find sand dune in Japan, but here you are.

Let’s sky jump here.

Sorry Kay Kay, this year we didn’t plan for a skiing trip. So, you could not see any snow. But we have sand.

And he loves to run on the sand.

Although it looks small, from one place to another also takes some time.

That’s the sand dune. See how small the people are?

Now, when you walk on it, you will find it quite big actually.

So, we need to ride camel first.

And they charge for taking photo of the camel too. So, please ask if you can take photo.

So, in order to take photo of the camel, we paid for the kids to ride a camel.

It would be cheaper for both to ride on the same camel.

And we can take picture of it.

They have ride horses before. So, riding a camel is the first time experience for them.

And Kay insists to bring the camel soft-toy he bought just now with him on a camel.

Here they go. Riding the camel. For the first time.

Bye bye Jay and Kay, see you in few minutes time.

Wow, now I can see that how important a camel is to the dessert people.

They are there. On a camel.

You see that Sand Dune behind them. Later, me and the kids will walk on the right side. And Mommy will “climb” the left side, the actual dune that has inclination angle > 50 degree. Hahahahah

Wow, they seems happy.

And Kay is playing with his camel soft toy. On a camel.

That concludes the ride.

Yeah, happy.

Let’s give the camel a pad.

Sand Dunes & Climbing it

Here comes the next challenge.

And the kids can’t wait to climb it.

Oh, some couple taking wedding photo over there.

Let’s take some nice photo here.

It is a dessert but not too hot. The sea breeze make it very pleasant.

While we are happily taking photos, the kids has already reach the middle of the sand dunes.

Really no joke. Big.

Kids running up the sand dune hills.

See the kids already climbing. And Jay has sit down for a short rest.

Video of the Sand Dunes.

Look to the left of the very steep hill, there are actually brave people climbing that. It must be more than 50 degrees inclination.

Of course, I am a heart patient so I cannot climb that!!! hahaha

So, to enjoy this some one must climb it.

Boon Ching!!!!!

That is how I “con” her to climb the left path. The very steep path and she accepted the challenge.

No joke. Very steep. But climbable.

She did slip a few times. Hopefully she won’t roll down.

And Kay Kay by this time, already running on top of the sand dune.

I shouted at him, “Sky Jump”. And he gladly jump.

Let’s jump again!

Mommy, you are almost there. 加油！

Opps, she slips.

Manage to get the foot hold. Almost there.

The kids celebrate by doing more sky jump. There you see mommy is almost reaching them.

Got to love the way they jumped.

Mommy quick.

Mommy, I give you a hand. I think Mommy must be very tired. hahahahahaha

Tired…

But joyful.

Good job, mommy.

As for me, I slowly climb la.

Luckily I bought new shoe. And you can see the sands are quite loose.

And see how my heart beat jump up with just a short climb. hahaha

It is totally a new scene up here.

Mommy and Kay Kay still staying there.

The other side of the sand dune is the sea. Sea of Japan.

And I made it to the top too.

360 degree of my surrounding.

Jay Jay is sitting there playing the sands. Let’s walk toward him.

Really love the breeze up here. And the scenery is nice too.

More sand dunes.

More Sea of Japan.

He is playing with the sands. And uses his iPhone camera to record all kind of slow mo.

He sit there also nice.

Mommy and Kay Kay also come. And Jay show them how to play with the sands.

Kay playing with the sands. Using a stick.

OK, its time to go back.

Kay Kay just love to run on the sand.

While walking, they will sit down on the sand for a while.

Playing with the soft soft sands.

So, my family loves snow, and they also love sand…..

Sun has gone down. Let’s go back to the onsen hotel.

Before we leave, let’s take a nice picture.

Eat my favourite ice cream.

Really tasty. Tottori is famous for its big pear. So, it is pear soft cream.

鱼见台

Dragon in the morning, and now fish.

In the mid-way back to hotel.

They have this funny looking rock.

I cannot read that first Chinese word. The second word is “rock”.

Let’s take another picture with Sea of Japan.

Oh nice bridge. blue bridge.

Jay really love the scenery here.

That concludes our 2nd day. Later, I will write what we eat and what I photograph at night. The 2nd day is eventful. We love the sand dunes. The seafood don is not bad. The Sea of Japan is nice!

Japan 2019 – Tottori (Day 2) Sand Dunes Date: Dec 16, 2019 We have a hard time to wake up. May be because we were too tired the day before.

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mycasandstarrs · 6 years ago

Text

SPN 8x05: “Blood Brother”

THEN: Sam retired because he met Amelia and had a normal life with her. Dean went to Purgatory and befriended a vampire. Cas was also in Purgatory. Kevin, Prophet of the Lord. Kevin and his mother ran away and are in hiding.

Eagle Harbor, Washington.

Benny’s getting revenge at anyone involved with his original death.

OOOHHH BENJAMIN.

RIP Quentin. Killed by Benny.

Stood up by Kevin...again.

“When's that little idiot gonna stop running from us?”

“I don't know, Dean. I mean, you did try to kill his mother.”

“I was trying to kill Crowley, okay? Who happened to be wearing Kevin's mother at the time. Well, there's a difference.”

Still doesn’t make it okay, Dean.

“Hello? Uh, hang on. There's not enough bars.” Subtle.

RIP numerous vamps. Killed by Benny.

“And – and what exactly is that supposed to mean, you've got to go?”

“Which words are giving you trouble?”

“You mind if I take the Toblerone?” Always gotta sneak in humor.

“Last I counted, you took a year off from the job. I need a day.” Good fucking point.

Benny and Dean hunting together in Purgatory as Benny whistles. I love that moment.

“Not stalking... concerned.” Stalking.

God no, please no Amelia in this flashback.

“Yeah, you really messed up that dog.” IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.

Resourceful Sam.

I do like how pleased Sam is with himself when he fixes the fan in their current hotel room.

Benny ain’t looking good.

“Benny? Not lookin' good.”

“Up yours.”

He still has his humor!

Benny cleans up good!

“Benny. What's going on?”

“You and that whole ‘friend’ thing, man.”

Cas!

“Well, I got to admit, Dean – he's got his strong points, but holy hell if he ain't a magnet.”

“Well, before we found Cas, you said it was my humanity that was drawing too much attention.”

“Yeah, that too.”

pfft.

“If you murder a monster in monster heaven, where does it go?” hahaha, I assume it just pops up somewhere else in Purgatory.

“And this is the crazy aunt I want to take on the road?”

“I am not your aunt.”

“What? Really?”

“I have no possible relationship to your sibling offspring.”

“Now, you’re kidding me.”

I love Benny and Cas’ bickering. it’s hilarious.

“the angel” “the vampire” They don’t even address each other by name.

“This dimension wants to spit you out, which is exactly what's gonna power our escape pod. Now, I'm pretty sure I can squeeze through, too, because, after all, you take away the fangs and the fun, I was born human, too.” Goddamn, I love Benny.

Cas trying to get off this ride early before it’s too late and too painful.

Dean insists on taking Cas.

Benny’s hunting his maker...who is also his murderer.

Another flashback.

Lady in 118. Amelia.

“I knew there was something off about you, with your creepy Army-Navy and your sideburns –” SHUT THE FUCK UP.

“Sea You Later” is a FANTASTIC yacht name.

“Boarded, burned, and buried at sea. My nest – that's how we fed... How we always fed. We kept a tight little fleet, maybe a half-dozen boats. Nothing ostentatious, just pleasure craft. I must have circled the Americas ten times during my tour. A few of us would act as stringers and patrol the harbors, looking for the right-size target – fat, rich yachts going to far-off ports. Take down the boat's name and destination, radio it to the crew in the water. And then we just, uh... let the ocean swallow up all our sins.”

That’s quite the strategy.

“Vampire pirates. That’s what you guys are? Vampirates.”

“You know, all the years we ran together, I can't believe nobody ever thought of that.”

“What do you mean? It's like the third thing you say.”

“No, it isn’t.”

The cutest banter.

“When you get turned, it's like you're reborn into a vampire nest. Your maker – he means everything to you. I mean, you really start believing he's God. Now, if your maker happens to believe the same thing, well...” The god complex.

Andrea Kormos.

“My life changed when she entered it, Dean. Everything I had been or done up to that point just... seemed to vanish... into what we had become together.“ That’s the sweetest damn thing.

They killed Benny because he left them for Andrea, and then “killed” her. I’d want revenge too.

Dean’s almost sent text: “Hunting vamps - nest on Prentiss Island...not alone”

He should’ve sent it.

“It's weird being back – in the world, I mean.”

“Sure as hell is.”

“I mean, what do you do with it all? All the – all the everything? Hell, I don't even know if this world is real, if I'm real.”

Huh, Benny is reminding me of Mary. Resurrected, but not used to the current world.

A new photo of Andrea. Benny knew.

Damn it, Benny. You got too distracted.

Sorento.

Should’ve sent that text Dean. Maybe Sam wouldn’t be calling.

Flashback.

“So that’s what you do? You stalk helpless women and you break into their motel room...and you fix their plumbing? Why are you fixing my sink?” This is only our third episode with Amelia, and I’m done with her already.

Why did she stuff limes down the sink??? Is there no trash can?

“Why am I explaining myself to you? You're a drifter or a handyman.” Judgmental much?

Can I punch her?

Dean finally answers Sam.

“It's kind of hard to explain right, but I'm sort of in the middle of cleaning out a vampire's nest, and it's sort of gone a little sideways on me.”

“WHAT?!”

JEEZ.

I’m so sick of this “all your friends are dead” crap.

“It's been a long time. Our father has come to trust my judgment over Sorento's. I answer only to him.”

“Well, sleeping with God has got to have some perks.”

BURN.

All that just to get them alone.

Andrea handing over a weapon and the keys to the handcuff.

Sam’s loud ass talking was perfect bait.

RIP vamp. Killed by Dean.

Another phone bites the dust.

“I know it won't change anything, but I regretted having you killed. When it was all done, I wailed when I saw you in all those pieces. Didn't I, Sorento? Didn't I wail like the ugliest baby in the world?” I somehow doubt that.

“If that's all I could salvage from my wayward son – the woman he defied his maker for – I wanted someone to remember you by.” haha, Benny’s a wayward son.

RIP more vamps. Killed by Dean.

Purgatory flashbacks.

You know what? I’m surprised Dean never brought up the fact that he was a vampire for a night. That would’ve been an interesting conversation between him and Benny.

“Look, all I'm saying is I started seeing something in humanity, okay? Something that shouldn't be taken. I drink blood. I don't drink people.” Benny liked humanity.

Leviathan are coming.

Sam casually stealing a car.

“the angry lady” that’s putting it nicely.

“I have to say – um... I've seen a lot of stitches in my time, and you've got really good hands.” That is a rather weird thing to say someone.

“I think it's creepy you buy all your clothing at army surplus. White supremacists do that....Drifting serial killers do that.”

Good points.

“You come from nowhere, you appear to be going nowhere, and you've, quote, ‘seen a lot of stitches.’ It's all pretty solid creepy.” Fair-ish points, but she’s also from nowhere and going nowhere.

“You have no idea where you're going, either, do you?....And that's because you have no one. I mean, at all, right? I mean, that's why you're... here, in this place.”

Sam reads her pretty well.

A very anxious Sam. I get it: he’s afraid something happened to Dean, and that he’s gonna have to start all over without him.

OH THE FIGHT MOVES ON BENNY.

RIP Sorento. Killed by Benny.

“I am evil, after all. At least I've had that much to keep me cold at night.” Nice line.

RIP Benny’s maker. Killed by Benny.

“We have everything we need right here. The operation is still perfect. We can ride the high seas, plunder together. We can have the life we always wanted.”

Andrea’s been corrupted. :( She’s gotta go.

“What I wanted was to leave a burning crater behind. I wanted to put your memory to rest.”

“But I'm not a memory. Benny, I'm right here.”

Not anymore.

“You think you're better than me now?” Andrea’s last words.

“No. I think we’re all damned.”

RIP Andrea. Killed by Dean.

Poor Benny.

“Why’d you do it Dean?”

“Do what?”

“Resurrect me?”

And then we launch into the flashback where BENNY SAVES CAS’ LIFE.

That has to be Sam’s biggest bitch face.

I always wondered why it was only by the touch of Benny’s hand that Sam knew something was up...and now i realize it’s because as a vampire, Benny must be stone cold.

That slow mo, silent exchange between Sam and Dean.

Oh no, THAT’S Sam’s biggest bitch face.

#supernatural #spn summer rewatch #spn liveblog #spn 8x05 #blood brother

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mcqueensgirl · 7 years ago

Text

Disney/Pixar Cars McQueen: OK... Here we go. Focus. Speed. I am speed. McQueen: One winner. 42 losers. I eat losers for breakfast. McQueen: Breakfast. Wait, maybe I should have had breakfast. A little breck-y could be good for me. No,no,no, stay focused. Speed. McQueen: I'm faster than fast. Quicker than quick. I am Lightning! Mack: (knock-knock)Hey Lightning, are you ready? McQueen: Oh, yeah. Lightning's ready. Song McQueen: Ka-chow! Song Seller: Get your antenna here! Fans: You got that right, Slick. Bob Cutlass: Welcome back to the Dinoco 400. I'm Bob Cutlass, here with my good friend, Darrel Cartrip. We're midway through what may turn out to be a historic day for racing. Darrel Cartrip: Bob, my oil pressure's through the roof right now. If this gets more exciting, they're gonna have to tow me outta the booth! Bob Cutlass: Right you are, Darrell. Three cars are tied for the season points lead, heading into the final race of the season. And the winner of this race Darrell, will win the season title and, the Piston Cup. Does The King, Strip Weathers, have one more victory in him before retirement? Darrell: He's been Dinoco's golden boy for years! Can he win them one last Piston Cup? Bob: And, as always, in the second place spot we find Chick Hicks. He's been chasing that tailfin his entire career. Darrell: Chick thought this was his year, Bob. His chance to finally emerge from The King's shadow. But the last thing he expected was...Lightning McQueen! Bob: You know, I don't think anybody expected this. The rookie sensation come into the season unknown. But everyone knows him now. Darrell: Will he be the first rookie to win a Piston Cup and land Dinoco? Bob: The legend, the runner up, and the rookie! Three cars, one champion! Song Chick: No you don't. Fans: Oohh. What a ride! Chick: Hahaha Fans: Go get'em, McQueen! Go get'em! Fans: We love you, Lightning! Chick: Dinoco is all mine. Race car: Ahhhh! Darrell: Trouble, turn three! Chick: Haha. Get through that, Mcqueen. Bob: Ouw.. A huge crash behind the leaders! Fans: Wahh!! Bob: Wait a second, Darrell. McQueen is in the wreckage. Darrell: There's no way the rookie can make it through! Not in one piece that is. Mia & Tia: Lightning, ahhh. Darrell: Look at that, McQueen made it through! Bob: Man, a spectacular move by Lightning McQueen. McQueen: Yeah! Ka-chow! Fans: McQueen (7X) Fan: Yeah McQueen! Ka-chow! Bob: While everyone else heads into the pits, McQueen stays out to take the lead! Broken car: Don't take me out coach. I can still race! Chick: Haha. What do you think boys? A thing of beauty. Chick's coach: McQueen made it through! Chick: What? Chick's coach: He's not pitting! Chick: Come on! Get me out there! Let's go! Get me back out there! Come on! Bob: McQueen's not going into the pits! Darrell: You know the rookie just fired his crew chief. That's the third one this season! Bob: Well he says he likes working alone Darrell. Chick's coach: Go, go, go! Bob: Looks like Chick got caught up in the pits. Darrell: Yeah, after a stop like that, he's got a lot of ground to make up.Get ready boys, we're coming to the restart! Chick: Come on, come on, come on! McQueen's crew: We need tires now! Come on, let's go! McQueen: No,no,no,no! No tires, just gas! McQueen's crew: What! You need tires, you idiot! Darrell: Looks like it's all gas-and-go's for McQueen today. Bob: That's right. No tires again. Darrell: Normally I said a short-term gain, long-term loss, but it's sure is workin' for him. He obviously knows somethin' we don't know. Bob: This is it Darrell, one lap to go and Lightning McQueen has a huge lead. Darrell: All he's got it in the bag. Call in the dogs and put out the fire! We're gonna crown us a new champion! McQueen: Checkered flag, here I come! Darrell: Oh, no! McQueen has blown a tire! Bob: And with only one turn to go! Can he make it? McQueen's crew: You fool! The King's Coach: McQueen's blown a tire!, McQueen's blown a tire! Go,go,go! Darrell: He lost another tire! The King and Chick are coming up fast! Bob: They're entering turn three! McQueen: Come on. Darrell: I don't belive what I'm watching, Bob! Darrell: Lightning McQueen is hundred feet from his Piston Cup! Bob: The King and Chick rounding turn four. Darrell: Down the stretch they come! And it's, and it's... Bob: It's too close to call! Too close to call! Darrell: I don't belive it! (2X) Mia & Tia: Lightning! Bob: The most spectacular, amazing unequivocally, unbelievable ending in the history of the world! And we don't even know who won! Darrell: Look at that! Security: Hey, no cameras! Get outta here! Kori Turbowitz: We're here in Victory Lane, awaiting the race results. McQueen that was quite a risky move, not taking tires. McQueen crew: Tell me about it. Kori Turbowitz: Are you sorry you don't have a crew chief out there? McQueen's Crew: Hah! McQueen: Oh Kori. There's a lot more to racing than just winning. I mean, taking the race by a full lap... Where's the entertainment in that? No no no... I wanted to give folks a little sizzle. McQueen's crew: Sizzle? McQueen: Am I sorry I don't have a crew chief? No, I'm not. Cause I'm a one-man show. McQueen crew: Whats? Oh, yeah right. Kori Turbowitz: That was a very confident Lightning McQueen. Coming to you live from Victory Lane, I'm Kori Turbowitz. Cameramen: Hey, get out of the shot! McQueen: Yo, Chuck, what are you doing? You're blocking the camera. Everyone wants to see the bolt. McQuenn crew: What? McQueen: Now, back away. McQueen's crew: Ahh! That's it. Come on guys. McQueen: Whoa, team! Where are going? McQueen's crew: We quit, Mr. One-Man Show! McQueen: Oh, OK, leave. Fine. Hahaha. How will I ever find anyone else who knows how to fill me up with gas? Adios Chuck! McQueen's crew: And my name is not Chuck! McQueen: Oh, whatever. Chuck: Hey, Lightning! Yo! McQueen! Seriously, that was some pretty darn nice racin' out there. By me! Hahaha! Chick's crew: Zinger Chick: Welcome to the Chick era, baby! The Piston Cup... It's mine dude. It's mine. Hey fellas, how do you think I'm look in Dinoco blue? Dinoco blue! Hahaha! McQueen: In your dreams Thunder. Chick: Yeah, right. Thunder? What's he talkin' about, "Thunder"? McQueen: You know, cause' thunder always comes after lightning. Pew, Kaka-phow! Chick: Who here knew about the thunder thing? Chick's crew: I didn't. Cameramen: Give us the bolt! Cameramen: That's right. Cameramen: Right in the lens. Cameramen: Show me the bolt, baby! Cameramen: Smile, McQueen! Cameramen: Show me the bolt, McQueen! Cameramen: That's it! Tex: Ohh we, that was one close finish. You sure made Dinoco proud. Thank you, King. The King: Well, Tex, you've been good to me all these years. It's the least I could do. Dear: Whatever happens, you're winner to me, you old daddy rabbit. The King: Thanks, dear. We wouldn't be nothing without you. Mia: I'm Mia. Tia: I'm Tia. Mia & Tia: We're like your biggest fans! Ka-chow! McQueen: I love being me. Security: OK, girls, that's it. Mia & Tia: We love you, Lightning! Some guys far away: We love you more!! The King: Hey, buddy. You're one gutsy racer. McQueen: Oh, hey, Mr. The King. The King: You got more talent in one lug nut than a lot of cars has got in their whole body. McQueen: Really? Oh, that... The King: But you're stupid. McQueen: Excuse me? The King: This ain't a one-man deal, kid. You need to wise-up and get you self a good crew chief and a good team. And you ain't gonna win unless you got good folks behind you, and you let them do their job, like they should. Like I tell the boys at the shop... McQueen: A good team. Yeahhh. Dreaming Song. Mia & Tia: Oh, McQueen. The King: If you figure that out, you just gonna be OK. McQueen: Oh, yeah, that.. That is spectacular advice. Thank you Mr. The King. Speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in Piston Cup history... McQueen: A rookie has won the Piston Cup. Yes!! Speaker: We have a three-way tie. Chick: Oh, ho. Hey, McQueen, that must be really embarrassing. But I wouldn't be worry about it. Because I didn't do it! Hahaha! Speaker: Piston Cup officials have determined that a tiebreaker race between the three leaders will be held in California in one week. Chick: Well, thank you! Thanks to all of you out there! Thank you! Hey, rook, first one to California gets Dinoco all to himself. Ahh! No, not me! No, you rock, and you know that! Balloon: Oh, yeah! Woaah!! McQueen: First one to California gets Dinoco all to himself. Ohh, we'll see who gets there first, Chick. Huh? Mack: Hey, kid! Congrats on the tie. McQueen: I don't want to talk about it. Come on, let's go, Mack. Saddle up. What'd you do with my trailer? Mack: I parked it at your sponsor's tent. McQueen: What? Mack: You gotta make your personal appearance. McQueen: No. No! No,no,no,no! McQueen: Yes, yes, yes! Lightning McQueen here. And I use Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment, new rear end formula! Nothing soothes rusty bumper like Rust-eze. McQueen: Wow! Look at that shine! Use Rust-eze and you too can look like me! Ka-chow! Rust-eze Car: Hahaha. I met this car from Swampscott. He was so rusty he didn't even cast a shadow. Rust-eze Van: You could see his dirty undercarriage. Hahaha. McQueen: Uahh! I hate rusty cars. This is not good for my image. Mack: They did give you your big break. Besides, it's in your contract. McQueen: Oh, will you stop please? Just go get hooked up. Rust-eze Van: Winter is a grand old time. Rust-eze Car: Of this there are no ifs or buts. Rust-eze Van: But remember, all that salt and grime... Rust-eze Car: Can rust your bolts and freeze your... Rust-eze Van: Hey look! There he is! Our almost champ! Victory ran to your rear end in here, kid. Fan: Lightning McQueen, you are wicked fast! Fan: That race was a pisser! Fan: You were booking McQueen! McQueen: Give me a little room guys. Fred: You're my hero Mr.McQueen. McQueen: Yes, I know. Fred, Fred, thank you. Fred: He knows my name. He knows my name! Rust-eze Van: Looking good, Freddie! Rust-eze Car: Thanks to you Lightning, we had a banner year! Rust-eze Van: We might clear enough to buy you some headlights. Rust-eze Car: Are you saying he doesn't have headlights? Rust-eze Van: That's what I'm telling ya. It's just stickers! McQueen: Well, you know, racecars don't need headlights, because the track is always lit. Rust-eze Car: Yeah, well,so is my brother, but he still needs headlights. Hahaha McQueen: Hahaha! Ha!! Hahaha!! Rust-eze Car: Ladies and gentlemen, Lightning McQueen! Fans: Free Bird! McQueen: You know, the Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment team ran a great race today. And remember, with a little Rust-eze...And an insane amount of luck, you too can look like me. Ka-chow. Rust-eze Car: Hey, kid. Rust-eze Van: We love ya. And we're looking forward to another great year. Just like this year. Hahaha. McQueen: Not on your life. Rust-eze Car: Don't drive like my brother! Rust-eze Van: Oh Yeah, don't drive like my brother! Mack: California, here we come! McQueen: Dinoco, here we come! Song McQueen: I needed this. Hello? Harv: Is this Lightning McQueen, the world's fastest racing machine? McQueen: Is this Harv, the world's greatest agent? Harv: And it is such a honor to be your agent and it almost hurts to take ten percent of your winnings and merchandising. And ancillary rights in perpetuity. Anyway, what a race! Hot champ! I didn't see it, but I heard you were great. McQueen: Thanks, Harv. Harv: Listen, they're giving you 20 tickets for the tiebreaker thing in Cali. I'll pass 'em on to your friends. You shoot me the names. You let Harv rock it for you. All right, baby? McQueen: Right. Friends. Yes, there's a... Harv: OK, I get it, Mr.Popular. So many friends you can't even narrow it down. Hey, when you get to town, you better make time for your best friend! You gotta break bread with your mishpoacheh here! McQueen: Yeah, yeah, that'd be great! We should totally... Harv: Ok, I gotta jump, kid. Let me know how it goes. I'm out. McQueen: What? A minivan? Oh, come on Mack, you're in the slow lane. This is Lightning McQueen you're hauling here. Mack: Just stopping off for a quick breather, kid. Old Mack needs a rest. McQueen: Absolutely not. McQueen: We're driving straight to all night till we get to California. We agreed to it. Mack: All night? May I remind you, federal DOT regs state... McQueen: Come on, I need to get there before Chick get hang with Dinoco. Mack: Ahh, all those sleeping trucks. Hey kid, I don't know if I can make it. McQueen: Oh, sure you can, Mack. Look, it'll be easy. I'll stay up with you. Mack: All night? McQueen: All night long. McQueen: Zzzzz... DJ Song Snot Rod: Ah, ahh, achowww! Wingo: Hahaha! Boost: Hey, yo, DJ. DJ: What up? Boost: We got ourselves a nodder. DJ: Hahaha. Mack: Pretty music. Boost: Yo, Wingo! Lane change, man. Wingo: Right back at ya! Hahaha. Snot Rod: Yeah! Boost: Oops! I missed. Snot Rod: You going on vacation? Tuner team: Hahaha. Boost: Oh, no, Snot Rod... Wingo: He's gonna blow! Snot Rod: Ahh...ahhh...ahhh...achoowww!!! Mack: Gesundheit! Hoho. One should never drive while drowsy. McQueen: MACK! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Hey,Mack! Mack! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack,wait for me! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack! Mack! McQueen: Mack! Mack... McQueen:...wait up! Mack. McQueen: Mack! Mack! McQueen: What?You're not Mack. Peterbilt: Mack?I ain't no Mack!I'm a Peterbilt, for dang sake! Peterbilt: Turn on your lights, you moron! McQueen: Mack... The Interstate! Sheriff: Ahh!. Not in my town, you don't. McQueen: Oh, no...Oh, maybe he can help me! He's shooting at me! Why is he shooting at me! Sheriff: I haven't gone this fast in years. I'm gonna blow a gasket or somethin'. McQueen: Serpentine! Serpentine, serpentine! Sheriff: What in the blue blazes? Crazy hot rodder. Filmore: I'm telling you, man, every third blink is slower. Sarge: The sixties weren't good for you, were they? McQueen: What? That's not the Interstate! Ahh ho, Auw, auw,auw! Ahhhh! No, no, no, no! Filmore: I'm not the only seeing this, right? Sarge: Incoming! Filmore: Whoa man. Sarge: No! Ramone: Hey, you scratch my paint! McQueen: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Luigi: My tires! McQueen: Phoah! Red: Huh! McQueen: Uargh! Red: Huh! Filmore: Fly away, Stanley. Be free! Sheriff: Boy, you're in a heap of trouble. Kori Turbowitz: We're live at the Los Angeles International Speedway as the first competitor, Lightning McQueen, is arriving at the track. Cameramen: Is it true he's gonna pose for Cargirl? Cameramen: Lightning, what's your strategy? Woahh! Mack: What? Did I forget to wipe my mud flaps? News: McQueen's driver arrived in California, but McQueen was missing. News: Racecar Lightning McQueen was reported missing. News: He scheduled to race an unprecedented... News: Sponsor stated they have no idea where he is. Junior: I hope Lightning's OK. I sure hate to see anything bad happen to him. Jay Limo: I don't know what's harder to find, Lightning McQueen or a crew chief who'll work for him! Hummer: Lightning McQueen must be found at all costs! News: They're all asking the same question: Where is McQueen? McQueen: Oh, boy. Where am I? Mater: Mornin', sleepin' beauty! McQueen: Ahhhhh!! Mater: Hahaha! Boy, I was wonderin' when you was gonna wake up. McQueen: Take whatever you want! Just don't hurt me! a parking boot? Why do I have a parking boot on? What's going on here? Please! Mater: You're funny. I like you already. My name's Mater. McQueen: Mater. Mater: Yeah, like "tuh-mater", but without the "tuh". What's your name? McQueen: You don't know my name? Mater: Uhh, no, I know your name. Is your name Mater too? McQueen: What? Look, I need to get to California as fast as possible. Where am I? Mater: Where are you? Shoot! You're in Radiator Springs. The cutest little town in Carburetor County. McQueen: Oh, great. Just great! Mater: Well, if you think that's great, you should see the rest of the town. McQueen: You know, I'd love to see the rest of the town! So if you could just open the gate, take this boot off, you and me, we go cruisin', check out the local scene... Mater: Dad-gum! McQueen: How'd that be, Tuh-Mater? Mater: Cool Sheriff: Mater! What did I tell you about talkin' to the accused? Mater: To not to. Sheriff: Well, quit yer yappin' and tow this delinquent road hazard to traffic court. Mater: Well, we'll talk later, Mater. Haha. "Later, Mater." That's funny! Sheriff: The Radiator Springs Traffic Court will come to order! Ramone: Hey, you scratched my paint! I ought take a blowtorch to you, man! Luigi: You broke-a the road! You a very bad car! Fillmore: Fascist! Commie! McQueen: Officer, talk to me, babe. How long is this gonna take? I gotta get to California, pronto. Sheriff: Where's your lawyer? McQueen: Tuh, I don't know. Tahiti maybe. He's got a timeshare there. Sheriff: When a defendant has no lawyer, the court will assign one to him. Hey! Anyone want to be his lawyer? Mater: Shoot, I'll do it, Sheriff! Sheriff: All rise! The Honorable Doc Hudson presiding. Luigi: Show-off. Sheriff: May Doc have mercy on your soul. Doc Hudson: All right, I wanna know who's responsible for wreckin' my town, Sheriff. I wanna his hood on a platter! I'm gonna put him in jail till he rots! No, check that. I'm gonna put him in jail till the jail rots on top of him, and then I'm gonna move him to a new jail and let that jail rot. I'm... Throw him out of here, Sheriff. I want him out of my courtroom. I want him out of our town! Case dismissed. McQueen: Yes! Mater: Boy, I'm purty good at this lawyerin' stuff. Sally: Sorry I'm late, Your Honor! McQueen: Holy Porsche! She's gotta be from my attorney's office. Hey, thanks for comin', we're all set. He's letting me go. Sally: He's letting you go? McQueen: Yeah, your job's pretty easy today. All you have to do now is stand there and let me look at you. Listen, I'm gonna cut to the chase. Me, you, dinner. Ka-chow! Sally: What the...? Auww! Please! McQueen: I know, I get that reaction a lot. I create feelings in others that they themselves don't understand. Sally: Ohhh, auww! McQueen: Oh, I'm sorry. Did I scare you? Mater: Well, a little bit, but I'll be alright. Sally: OK. I'm gonna go talk to the judge. McQueen: Do what you gotta do, baby. Oh, but listen. Be careful. Folks around here are not firing on all cylinders, if you know what I mean. Mater: Ka-ching! Auww! Sally: I'll keep that in mind. Hey there, Mater. Mater: Howdy, Sally. Sally: Hi, folks! Folks: Good morning! Sally. McQueen: You know her? Mater: She's the town attorney and my fiancee. McQueen: What? Mater: Nah, I'm just kiddin'. She just like me for my body. Sally: Doc, you look great this morning. Did you do something different with your side view mirrors? Doc: What do you want, Sally? Sally: Ah, come on, make this guy fix the road. The town needs this. Doc: No. I know his type. Racecar. That's the last thing this town needs. Sally: OK, I didn't want to have to do this, Doc, but you leave me no choice. Fellow citizens, you're all aware of our town's proud history. Doc: Here she goes again. Sally: Radiator Springs, the glorious jewel strung on the necklage of Route 66, the mother road! It is our job and our pleasure to take care of the travelers on our stretch of that road. Sarge: Travelers? What travelers? Filmore: Ignore him. Sally: But how, I ask you, are we to care for those travelers if there is no road for them to drive on? Luigi, what do you have at your store? Luigi: Tires Sally: And if no one can get to you? Luigi: I won't sell any...tires. I will lose everything! Ohho. Sally: Flo, what do you have at your store? Flo: I have gas. Lotsa gas! Sally: OK boys, stay with me. And, and, Flo, what'll happen if no one can come to your station to buy gas? Flo: I'll go outta business and... we'll have to leave town. Sally: And what's gonna happen to all of us if Flo leaves town and closes her station? Folks: Without gas, we're done for! Lizzie: What? Sally: So, don't you think the car responsible should fix our road? Lizzie: The only guy strong enough to fix that road is Big Al! Ramone: Lizzie, the guy left, like, 15 years ago. Lizzie: Then why are you bringing him up, you lemon? Sally: Oh, he can do it. He's got the horsepower. So, what do you want him to do? Folks: Fix the road! Sally: Because we are a town worth fixing! Folks: Yeah!!! Doc: Order in the court! Seems like my mind has been changed for me. Folks: Yeah!! McQueen: No! Filmore: Nice rulin'. McQueen: Ohh, I am so not take you to dinner. Sally: That's OK, Stickers. You can take Bessie. Mater: Oh man, you got to work with Bessie! I'd give my left two lug nuts for somethin' like that. McQueen: Bessie? Who's Bessie? Doc: This here is Bessie, finest road-pavin' machine ever built. I'm hereby sentencing you to community service. You're gonna fix the road under my supervision. McQueen: What? This place is crazy! Mater: Hey, I know this may be a bad time right now, but tha, you owe me $32,000 in legal fees. McQueen: What? Doc: So we're gonna hitch you up to sweet Bessie, and you're gonna pull her nice. McQueen: You're gotta be kidding me. Doc: You start there where the road begins, you finish down there where the road ends. Mater: Holy shoot! McQueen: Whoa, whoa, whoa! How long is this gonna take? Doc: Well, fella does it right, should take him about five days. McQueen: Five days? But I should be in California schmoozing Dinoco right now! Doc: Then if I were you, I'd quit yappin and start workin'! Hook him up, Mater. Mater: Okay-dokey. McQueen: Freedom!! Mater: Maybe I should've-a hooked him up to Bessie...and then-a...then took the boot off. McQueen: Wuuuhuuu! Goodbye, Radiator Springs, and goodbye, Bessie! California, here I come! Yeah! Oh, fell that wind. Yes! No,no,no,no! Outta gas? How can I be outta gas? Sheriff: Hahaha. Boy, we ain't as dumb as you think we are. McQueen: But,but,but how did, how did...you...? Sally: We siphoned your gas while you were passed out. Ka-chow. McQueen: Auw,auw,auw,auw,auwww!! Sheriff: Hahaha. Sheriff: Gentlemen. Sarge: Sheriff. Filmore: Hai, Sheriff. Luigi: Why the tires are here? Guido: Sono sempre stati qui. Luigi: They were better well before. Guido: Stai sempre a parlare. Luigi: Guido! Lizzie: Red, can you move over? I want to get look at that sexy hot rod. Mater: You know, I used to be a purty good whistler. I can't do it now of course, on account of sometimes I get fluid built up in my engine block, but Doc said he's gonna fix it dough. He can fix about anything. That's why we made him the judge. Boy, you shoulda heard me on Giddy-up, Oom Papa Mow Mow. Now, I'm not one to brag, but people come purty far to see me get low on the "Mow-Mow". McQueen: Ah? Ah, man, that's just great! Mater: Hey, what's wrong? McQueen: My lucky sticker's all dirty. Mater: Thaah, that ain't nothin'. I'll clean it for ya. McQueen: No,no,no! That wouldn't be necessary. Hey! Hey, big fella! Yeah, you in the red! I could use a little hose down. Help me wash this off. What, where's he goin'? Mater: Oh, he's still a little bit shy, and he hates you for killin' his flowers. McQueen: I shouldn't have to put up with this. I'm a precision instrument of speed and aerodynamics. Mater: You hurt your what? McQueen: I'm a very famous racecar! Luigi: You are a famous racecar? A real racecar? McQueen: Yes, I'm a real racecar. What do you think? Look at me. Luigi: I have followed racing my entire life of my whole life! McQueen: Then you know who I am. I'm Lightning McQueen. Luigi: Lightening McQueen! McQueen: Yes! Yes! Luigi: I must scream it to the world! My excitement from the top of someplace very high! Do you know many Ferraris? McQueen: No,no,no. They race on the European circuit. I'm in the Piston Cup! What? Luigi: Luigi follow only the Ferraris. Flo: Is that what I think it is? Sally: Customers. Customers! Customers, everyone! Customers! OK. Lizzie: Customers? Sally: All right, everybody calm down for a long time. Just remember what we rehearsed. Make sure your "Open, please come in" signs are out. And you all know what to do. All right, nobody panics. Here we go! Minny: Van, I just don't see any on-ramp anywhere. Van: Minny, I know exactly where we are. Minny: Yeah, we're in the middle of nowhere. Van: Honey, please. Sally: Hello. Welcome to Radiator Springs, gateway to Ornament Valley. Legendary for it's quality service and friendly hospitality. How can we help you? Van: We don't need anything, thank you very much. Minny: Whoa, honey ask her direction to the Interstate. Van: There's no need to ask for directions. Minny, I know exactly where we're going. Minny: He did the same thing on our trip to Shakopee. You know, we were headed over there for the Crazy Days, and we... Van: OK,OK. Really. We're just peachy, OK? Filmore: What you really need is the sweet taste of my homemade, organic fuel. Van: No, it doesn't agree with my tank. Minny: We're just trying to find the Interstate. Sarge: Good to see you, Soldier! Come on by Sarge's Surplus Hut for all your government surplus needs. Minny: Ohh, honey, surplus! Van: I think we have too much surplus. Sally: I do have a map over the Cozy Cone Motel. And if you do stay, we offer a free Lincoln Continental breakfast. Minny: Honey, she's got a map. Van: I don't need a map! I have the GPS. Never need a map again, thank you. Flo: How 'bout somethin' to drink? Stop at Flo's V8 Cafe. Finest fuel on Route 66. Van: No, we just top off. Luigi: And if you need tires, stop by Luigi's Casa Della Tires, home of the Leaning Tower of Tires. Minny: We're just trying to find the Interstate. Ramone: But you do need a paint job man. Ramone will paint you up right. Hey, anything you want! You know, like a flame job. Minny: No, thanks... Ramone: Maybe ghost flames! You like old school pinstripin'? Von Dutch style ha? Minny: Oh, honey, look. Von Dutch. Van: Oh, ho, OK, no. Ahahaha. We're gonna be going now, OK? Auww! Lizzie: A little somethin' to remember us by, OK? Van: Oh,ha,ha. OK! Sally: Come back soon, OK? I mean, you know where we are! Tell your friends! Van: HohohOK! Yes. You bet. Minny: Thanks again, folks. Bye-bye now. McQueen: Psst! Psst! Hey! Hey, hey,hey! I know how to get to the Interstate! Minny: Oh, do ya? Van: Minny, no. McQueen: Yeah, yeah,yeah. No, not really. But listen. I'm Lightning McQueen, the famous racecar. I'm being held heren against my will. And I need you to call my team, so they can rescue me, and get me to California in time for me to win The Piston Cup. Do you understand? McQueen: No,no,no,no,no. No, It's the truth! I'm telling you! You gotta help me! Don't leave me here! I'm in hillbilly hell! My IQ's dropping by the second! I'm becoming one of them! Sally: OK, don't worry. They know where we are now. They're gonna tell their friends. You'll see. Radio: And we'll be back for our Hank Williams marathon... Sally: That's good. Radio:...after a Piston Cup update. Still no sign of Lightning McQueen. Meanwhile, Chick Hicks arrived in California and today became the first car to spend practice time on the track. Chick: Yeah, well it's just nice to get out here before the other competitors. You know, get a headstart. Gives me an edge. Dreaming Song Chick: Yeah. Chick: Hey, McQueen... Eat your heart out. McQueen: Mater, let me get this straight. I can go when this road is done. That's the deal, right? Mater: That's what they done did said. McQueen: OK. Outta my way. I got a road to finish. Mater: He's done! Doc: Done? Mater: Ahmhm. Doc: It's only been an hour. McQueen: I'm done. Look, I'm finished. Just say thank you, and I'll be on my way. That's all I gotta say. Mater: Weehoo! I'm the first one on the new road! Ahho! It rides purty smooth. Sally: It looks awful! McQueen: Well, it matches the rest of the town. Sally: Ahh. Red: Umph, huhuhuh. Sally: Red. Who do you think you are? McQueen: Look, Doc said when I finish, I could go. That was the deal. Doc: The deal was you fix the road, not making it worse. Now, scrape it off! Start over again. McQueen: Hey, look, grandpa, I'm not a bulldozer. I'm a racecar. Doc: Hohoho. Is that right? Then why don't we just have a little race? Me and you. Sally: What? McQueen: Hohoho. Me and you. Is that a joke? Doc: If you win, you go and I fix the road. If I win, you do the road my way. Sheriff: Doc, what're you doin'? McQueen: Hahaha. I don't mean to be rude here Doc, but you probably go zero to sixty in like what? Three-point-five years? Doc: Then I reckon you ain't got nothin' to worry about. McQueen: You know what old timer? That's a wonderful idea. Let's race. Sheriff: Gentlemen, this will be a one-lap race. You will drive to Willy's Butte, go around Willy's Butte and come back. There will be no bumpin', no cheatin', no spittin', no bittin', no road rage, no maimin', no oil slickin', no pushin', no shovin', no backstabbin', no road-hoggin' and no lollygaggin'. McQueen: Speed. I'm speed. Float like a Cadillac, sting like a Beemer. Luigi: OhHohohoo. My friend Guido, he dream to give a real racecar a pit stop. Guido: Pit stop. McQueen: Aa, haha. The race is only one lap, guys. Uno lappo! Don't need any help. I work solo mio. Luigi: Fine. Race your way. McQueen: No pit stoppo. Comprendo? Guido: OK. Sheriff: Gentlemen. Start your engines! Ramone: Hijole! Check that out! Filmore: Whoa. Flo: Emm, emm. Sally: Great idea, Doc. Now the road will never get done. Sheriff: Luigi. Luigi: Hohoho. On your mark, get set. Uno for the money, due for the show, tre to get ready, and quattro to... I can't belive it. Go!! Hahaha. Doc: Yehaa! Hahaha! Sally: Yeah. Luigi: Huh? Doc, the flag means go. Remember the flag. Here we go. Go. Ramone: Uhh, Doc, what are you doing, man? Doc: Oh, dear. It would seem I'm off to a poor start. Well, better late than never. Come on, Mater. Might need a little help. Mater: Ahh, OK. Doc: You got your tow cable? Mater: Well, yeah. I always got my tow cable. Why? Doc: Ohh, just in case. McQueen: Ahh,auw,auw,auw,no,no,no,no,no! Ramone: Oh, man! Auww!! Filmore: Whoa. Bad trip, man. Doc: Hey! Was that floatin' like a Cadillac, or was that stingin' like a Beemer? I'm confused. Mater: Eh,eh,eh. Doc: You drive like you fix roads. Lousy! Have fun fishin', Mater McQueen: Ahhh! Mater: I'm startin' to think he knowed you was gonna crash! McQueen: Thank you, Mater. Thank you. McQueen: I can make a little turn on dirt. You think? No. And now I'm a day behind. I'm never gonna get outta here! Ramone: Hey, ese! You need a new paint job, man! McQueen: No, thank you. Filmore: How 'bout some organic fuel? Sarge: That freak juice? McQueen: Pass. Flo: Whooh, watchin' him workin' is makin' me thirsty. Anybody else want somethin' to drink? Mater: Nah, not me, Flo. I'm on one of them there special diets. I'm a precisional instrument of speed and aero-matics. McQueen: "You race like you fix roads." I'll show him. I will show him! McQueen: Great! I hate it! Hate, hate, hate, hate it!! Doc: Haha. Music. Sweet music. Sally: Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. McQueen: Radiator Springs, a happy place. Bessie: Peckkk. McQueen: Whoa, OK, Bessie you think that funny? Great! I'm talking to Bessie now! I'm talkin to Bessie!! Mater: Hahaha. Sally: Wow. Mater: Mornin', Sally! Hey, look at this here fancy new road that Lightnin' McQueen done just made! Sally: Yes! Amazing! Ramone: Yeah! Flo: Ohh, Ramone, Mama ain't seen you that low in years. Ramone: I haven't seen a road like this in years. Flo: Well, then let's cruise, baby. Ramone: Low and slow. Luigi: E Bellissima! It's beautiful! Guido, look, it's a like it was paved by angels. Ohhh. Mater: Oh, I tell you what. I bet even the roads on the moon ain't this smooth. Sally: Doc, look at this. Shoulda tossed him into the cactus a lot sooner, huh? Doc: Well, he ain't finished yet. Still got a long way to go. Luigi: Guido, look at Luigi! Hahaha. This is fantastico! Sally: That looks like fun! Mater, I got dibs, next turn! Lizzie: Hey, Luigi, this new road makes your place look like a dump. Luigi: Ahhh, that crazy old devil woman. Ohh, ohh. She's right! Sally: Ohh, ahh! Luigi: Guido! Doc: That punk actually did a good jab. Well, now... where the hack is he? Doc: Sheriff! Is he makin' another run for it? Sheriff: No,no. He ran outta asphalt in the middle of the night, asked me if he could come down here. All he's tryin' to do is make that there turn. McQueen: No,no,no,no! Ohh, great. Perfect turns on every track I've ever raced on. Doc: Sheriff, why don't you go get yourself a quart of oil at Flo's. Doc: I'll keep an eye on him. Sheriff: Well, thanks, Doc. I've been feelin' a quart low. McQueen: Ahhhhh! Phuahh, thahh! Doc: This ain't asphalt, son. This is dirt. McQueen: Oh, great. What do you want? You hear to gloat? Doc: You don't have three-wheel brakes, so you got to pitch it hard, break it loose and then just drive it with the throttle. Give it too much, you'll be outta the dirt and into the tulips. McQueen: So you're a judge, a doctor and a racing expert. Doc: I'll put it simple. If you goin' hard enough left, you'll find yourself turnin' right. McQueen: Ooo, right. That makes perfect sense. Turn right to go left. Yes! Thank you! Or should I say,"No thank you"? Because in Opposite World, maybe that really means, "Thank you"! Tuh, crazy grandpa car. What an idiot! Doc: Ahhh. McQueen: Turn right to go left. Oh. Whoa, auwwww. Oh, that... AUUUUUWWWWWW!!! McQueen: Turn right to go left. Guess what. I tried it. You know what? This crazy thing happened... I went right! Lizzie: You keep talkin' to yourself, people'll think you crazy. McQueen: Thanks for the tip. Lizzie: What? I wasn't talkin' to you. Sally: Oh, Guido, e bellissimo! Guido: Che cosa? Sally: It looks great! This is great! Guido: Ti piace, eh? Si, si, bellissimo. Mater: Ummmph. Oh, lord. Hehehe. Sheriff: Mater! I need you to watch the prisoner tonight. Mater: Well, dad-gum! Wait a minute, what if he tries to run again? Sheriff: Just let him run outta gas and tow him on back. But keep an eye on him. Mater: Yes, sir! McQueen: While I'm stuck here paving this stinkin' road, Chick's in California schmoozing Dinoco. My Dinoco. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Who's touching me? Luigi: You have a slow leak. Guido, he fix. You make a such a nice new road. You come to my shop. Luigi take a good care of you. Eventhough you not a Ferrari. You buy four tires, I give you a full size spare absolutely free! McQueen: Look, I get all my tires for free. Luigi: Hohoho.. I like your style, eh? You drive the hard bargain. OK. Luigi make you a new deal. You buy one tire, I give you three for free! Flo: Aaa... Would you look at that? Ramone, Ramone! Ramone: Hm,hm,hm. Luigi: Then Luigi make you a new deal McQueen: No,no,no,no. Deal me out. Pass. No, thank you. Luigi: No,no,no,no,no. This is it. My last offer. You buy one tire, I give you seven-a snow tire for all free! Done. You interested, you call me. You know where I am. McQueen: Fuuuhhh. Ahhhh. Stop! Let me...Tuhh, puahh!! sally: Oh, Red, you missed a spot. See it right there? On the hood right there. McQueen: No, no! Noooo!! Stop, stop! That cold!! Help! Please! Stop! Sally: Thanks, Red. McQueen: What was that for? Sally: Do you want to stay at the Cozy Cone or what? McQueen: Huh? Sally: And if you do, you gotta be clean. 'Cause even here in hillibilly hell we have standards. McQueen: What,I...? I don't get it. Sally: Nothing I just thought I'd say thank you for doin' a great job. So I thought I'd let you stay with me. I mean, not with me! But there. Not with me there, but there in your own Cozy Cone. And I'd be in my cone, and it's... McQueen: Wait. Wait, you're being nice to me. Sally: I mean if you want to stay at the dirty impound, thats, thats fine. You know, I understand you criminal types. McQueen: No,no,no,no. That's OK. Yeah, the Cozy Cone. Sally: Ehhh. It's newly refurbished McQueen: Haha. Yeah, it's like a clever little twist the motel's made out of caution cones, which, of course, cars usually try to avoid, now we're gonna stay in them. Haha. That's funny. Sally: Figure that all out on your own, did you? Cone number one, if you want. McQueen: Auuhhh. McQueen: Hey, do I spy a little pinstriping tattoo back there? Sally: Auuww. Haha. That's just a... Ahhahaha. Auuww. You saw that? Yeah! Just gonna be going. Gonna...Yeah. Mater: You know, I once knew this girl Doreen. Good-lookin' girl. Looked just like a Jaguar, only she was a truck! You know, I used to crash into her, just so I could spoke to her. McQueen: What are you talking about? Mater: I don't know. Hey, I know somethin' we can do tonight, 'cause I'm in charge of watchin' you! McQueen: No, Mater, I gotta finish this road, and I have to get out of here. Mater: Well, that's all right, Mr. I Can't Turn On Dirt. You probably couldn't handle it anyway. McQueen: Whoa, whoa, easy now, Mater. You know who you're talkin' to? This is Lightning McQueen. I can handle anything. McQueen: Mater, I'm not doin' this. Mater: Oh, come on, you'll love it. Hehehe. Tractor-tippin's fun. McQueen: This is ridiculous. Mater: All right, listen. When I say go, we go. But don't let Frank catch ya. Go! McQueen: Whoa! Wait! Who, who's Frank? Mater. Wait, Mater! Mater: OK, here's what you do. You just sneak up in front of 'em, and then honk. And they do the rest. Watch this. Mater: Hahahaha. I swear, tractors is so dumb! I tell you what, buddy, you don't get much better than this. McQueen: Yep, you're livin' the dream, Mater boy. Mater: I don't care who you are, that's funny right there. Oh, you turn, bud. McQueen: Mater, I can't. I don't even have a horn. Mater: Baby. McQueen: I'm not a baby. Mater: Puuuck, puck, puck. McQueen: Fine. Stop! stop, OK? All right. I'll do something. Mater & McQueen: Hahahahaha!!! Mater: That's Frank. McQueen: Ahhhh!! Mater: Run, hahaha , run!!! Mater: Run! He's gonna get ya! Hahaha!! Sally: Customers! Mater: Tomorrow night we can go look for the ghostlight! McQueen: I can't wait, Mater. Mater: Oh, yeah, I'm tellin' ya! Oh, boy, you gotta admit that was funnn unn! McQueen: Oh, yeah...yeah. Mater: Well, we better get you back to the impound lot. McQueen: You know, actually, Sally's gonna let me stay at the motel. Mater: Aaaa... Gettin' cozy at the Cone, is we? McQueen: Oh, come...No. No, are you kidding? Besides, she can't stand me. And I don't like her, to be honest. Mater: Yeah, you probably right. Hey, look, there's Miss Sally! McQueen: Where, where? Mater: Hahaha. You're in love with Miss Sally. McQueen: No, I'm not. Mater: Yes, you do. McQueen: No way. Mater: Way. McQueen: Come on, look Mater: You're in love with Miss Sally(2X) McQueen: OK, that's real mature Mater, real grown up. Mater: You love her (7X) McQueen: Wait...All right. OK. Mater, Mater, Mater, no. Will you stop that? Mater: Stop what? McQueen: That's driving backwards stuff. It's creeping me out. You're gonna wreck on somethin'. Mater: Wreck? Shoot! I'm the world's best backwards driver! You just watch this right here, lover boy. McQueen: What are you doing? Watch out! Look out! Mater? Mater! Mater! McQueen: Hey take it easy, Mater! Mater: Waaaaaaa! Ha,ha,ha! Hee,hee. McQueen: Hahaha. He's nuts. Mater: No need to watch where I'm goin'. Just need to know where I've been. McQueen: Whoa, that was incredible! How'd you do that? Mater: Rearview mirrors. We'll get you some, and I'll teach you if you want. McQueen: Yeah, maybe I'll use it in my big race. Mater: What's so important about this race of yours, anyway? McQueen: It's not just a race. We're talking about the Piston Cup! I've been dreaming about it my whole life! I'll be the first rookie in history ever to win it. And when I do, we're talkin' big new sponsor, with private helicopters. No more medicated bumper ointment. No more rusty old cars. Mater: What's wrong with rusty old cars? McQueen: Well, I don't mean you, Mater. I mean other old cars. You know? Not like you. I like you. Mater: Nahhh, it's OK, buddy. Hey, you think maybe one day I can get a ride in one of them helicopters? I mean, I've always wanted to ride in one of them fancy helicopters. McQueen: Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, sure. Mater: You mean it? McQueen: Oh, yeah. Anything you say. Mater: I knew it. I knowed I made a good choice! McQueen: In what? Mater: My best friend. Mater: See you tomorrow, buddy! McQueen and Sally parked beneath a tree, K-I-S somethin'-somethin'-somethin'-t!! McQueen: Hahaha! Whoa, whoa. Haha. McQueen: Number one. Number one...Ahhh...Number one! McQueen: Ahh, this is nice. Sally: Hey, Stickers. McQueen & Sally: Huh!! Sally: I'm sorry. McQueen: Wohho!! You scared me. You gotta be careful. Sally: I scared myself scaring you scaring me. McQueen: I mean, I wasn't like "scared" scared. Sally: No, of course not. Not. McQueen: I was more... Sally: Just I overheard you talkin' to Mater. McQueen: When? Just, just now? What, what did, what did you hear? Sally: Oh, just something about a helicopter ride. McQueen: Oh, yeah. Yeah, he got a kick out of that, didn't he? Sally: Did you mean it? McQueen: What? Sally: That you'll get him a ride. McQueen: Oh, who knows? I mean first things first. I gotta get outta here and make the race. Sally: Ah, hah. You know...Mater trusts you. McQueen: Yeah, OK. Sally: Did you mean that? McQueen: What? Sally: Was it just a "Yeah, OK", or "Yeah...OK" or"Yea-yeah, OK" McQueen: Look, I'm exhausted. It's kinda been a long day. Sally: Yeah, OK. G'night. McQueen: Oh ah. Hey, thank you. Sally: What did you just say? McQueen: You know, thanks for lettin' me stay here. It's nice to be out of the impund, and this is... It's great. Newly refurbished, right? Sally: Yeah. McQueen: Good night. Sally: Good night. Sally: Huhh. Sarge: Will you turn that disrespectful junk off? Filmore: Respect the classics, man. It's Hendrix! McQueen: Ahh...huh...please...huh... Dreaming Song McQueen: No!! Frank: Uarghhh!! McQueen: Noooo!!! I gotta get outta here! McQueen: Hey, have you seen the Sheriff? Oh! Oh, my gosh. Oh! Doc: Hey, what are you doin'? Sheriff: Get a good peak, city boy? McQueen: I,a..a..I just need my daily gas ration from the Sheriff. Doc: Wait for him at Flo's. Now get outta here. McQueen: I've been trying to get outta here for three days! Sheriff: Hope you enjoyed the show! McQueen: Whoaho, Doc. Time to clean out the garage, buddy, come on. McQueen: What? He has a Piston Cup? McQueen: Oh, my gosh. Three Piston Cup? Doc: Sign says stay out. McQueen: You, you have three Piston Cups. How could you have... Doc: I knew you couldn't drive. I didn't know you couldn't read. McQueen: You're the Hudson Hornet! Doc: Wait over at Flo's, like I told ya! McQueen: Of course. I can't belive I didn't see it before. You're The Fabulous Hudson Hornet! You still to hold the record for most wins in single season. Oh, we gotta talk. You gotta show me your tricks. Please. Doc: I already tried that. McQueen: And you won the championship three times! Look at those trophies! Doc: You look. All I see is a bunch of empty cups. Filmore: You know, some automotive yoga could really lower your RPM's, man. Sarge: Oh, take a car wash, hippie. Flo: Yeah, look at my husband, y'all. Hooo...That's your color! Ramone: Yellow, baby. Hahaha. Flo: Mmm! You smokin' hot! Sheriff: There he is! McQueen: Oh, my gosh! Did you know Doc is a famous racecar? Folks: Hahahaha! Sheriff: Doc? Our Doc? Sarge: Not Doc Hudson. McQueen: No,no,no,no, it's true! He's a real racing legend. He's The Fabulous Hudson Hornet! Flo: Fabulous? I never seen Doc drive more than 20 miles an hour. I mean, have you ever seen him race? McQueen: No, but I wish I could have of. They say he was amazing! He wins three Piston Cups. Mater: Phooah!! He did what in his cup? Sheriff: I think the heat's startin' to get to the boy! Lizzie: Well, I'll say! Look how red he is! Ramone: Yeah, I think he needs a new coat of poly, man. Mater: Are you sick, buddy? Sheriff: You are lookin' a little peaked. Ramone: Yeah, he needs a new coat of poly for sure! Sheriff: Hey, hey! What are you doin'? Sally: It's OK, Sheriff. You can trust me, right? Sheriff: I trust you, all right. It's him I'm worried about. Sally: Mmm... I trust him. Come on, let's take a drive. McQueen: A drive? Sally: Yeah, a drive. Don't you big city racecars ever just take a drive? McQueen: Ahhh...No. No, we don't. Sally: Hey, Stickers! Do you comin' or what? Flo: Ahmm. And you thought he was gonna run. Ramone: Hey, can you believe it, man? He actually thought Doc was a famous racecar! Hahaha... That's so too much!! McQueen: OK, you got me out here. Where are we goin'? Sally: I don't know. McQueen: Whoa! Yes. Sally: Hahaha. McQueen: Whoa! Hahaha. Uahh!! Sally: Hahaha. McQueen: Thahhh! Sally: Ah.. hahaha! Sally: Ah.. hahaha! McQueen: Hahaha! Thuhhh!!Thuhh!! McQueen: Wow! What is this place? Sally: Wheel Well. Used to be the most popular stop on the mother road. McQueen: This place? Sally: Yeah, imagine...Oh, imagine what it must have been like to stay here. McQueen: You know, I don't get you. How does a Porsche wind up in a place like this? Sally: Well, it's really pretty simple. I was...an attorney in LA livin' life in the fast lane, and. McQueen: Oh, you were, were you? Were you rich? Sally: What? McQueen: Just...clues to the puzzle. Sally: Yeah, OK. Well, that was my life. And you know what? It never felt...happy. McQueen: Yeah. I mean...really? Sally: Yeah. So I left California. Just drove and drove and finally broke down right here. Doc fixed me up, Flo took me in. Well, they all did. And I never left. McQueen: Yeah. You know, I understand. You need a little R & R. Recharge and old batteries. But you know, after a while, why didn't you go back? Sally: I fell in love. McQueen: Ohh. Sally: Yep. McQueen: Corvette? Sally: No. Sally: I fell in love with this. McQueen: Whoa. Look at that. Look, they're drivin' right by. They don't even know what they're missing! Sally: Well, it didn't used to be that way. McQueen: Oh, yeah? Sally: Yeah. Forty years ago, that Interstate down there didn't exist. McQueen: Really? sally: Yeah. Back then, cars came across the country a whole different way. McQueen: How do you mean? Sally: Well, the road didn't cut through land like that Interstate. It moved with the land, you know? It rose, it fell, it curved. Folk: Mornin'! Folk: Nice day, huh? Sally: Cars didn't drive on it to make a great time. They drove on it to have a great time. Song McQueen: Well, what happened? Sally: The town got bypassed just to save ten minutes of driving. Song McQueen: How great would it have been to see this place in its heyday! Sally: Ohh...I can't tell you how many times I've dreamed of that. But one of these days, we'll find a way to get it back on the map. McQueen: Yeah. Hey, listen, thanks for the drive. I had a great time. It's kinda nice to slow down every once in a while. Sally: You're welcome. Mater: Hey, listen, listen! If anybody asks you, we was out smashin' mailboxes, OK? McQueen: Wha... What? Ramone: Oh, man, the paint's still wet! Luigi: No,no,no,no! Get out of the store! Hey! Don't eat the radial! Here, take-a the snow tires. Sheriff: Mater! Mater: I wasn't tractor-tippin'! Sheriff: Then where did all these gol-durn tractors come from? Mater: Whoa, boy! Whoa! McQueen: Hahaha. Hey! Hey guys. There's one goin' this way. I got it. McQueen: Come here, little tractor, come here. Yeah, that's a good tractor. No,no,no,no, come here. What are you doing? You're not supposed to go wandering off all...alone. McQueen: What are you doin' with those old racin' tires? Doc: Huuhhh. McQueen: Come on, Doc, drive. Doc: Ahhhh. Yeah. McQueen: Wow! You're amazing! What are you doin'? Doc, wait! Mater: Giddup right in there! Come on, Rusty. Weee...heyy! McQueen: Doc, hold it! Seriously, your driving's incredible! Doc: Wonderful. Now, go away. McQueen: Hey, I mean it. You've still got it! Doc: I'm askin' you to leave. McQueen: Come on. I'm a racecar, you're... a much older racecar, but under the hood you and I are the same. Doc: We are not the same! Understand? Now, get out. McQueen: How could a car like you quit at the top of your game? Doc: You think I quit? McQueen: Right. Your big wreck in '54. Doc: They quit on me. When I finally got put together, I went back expecting a big welcome. You know what they said? "You're history". Moved right on to the next rookie standing in line. There was a lot left in me. I never got chance to show 'em. I keep that, to remind me never to go back. I just never expected that that world would...would find me here. McQueen: Hey, look, Doc, I'm not them. Doc: Oh, yeah? McQueen: No, I'm not. Doc: When is the last time you cared about something except yourself, hot rod? You name me one time. And I will take it all back. Ahhuh? I didn't think so. These are good folk around here, who care about one another. I don't want 'em depending on someone they can't count on. McQueen: Oh, like you? You've been here how long and your friends don't even know who you are? Who's caring about only himself? Doc: Just finish that road and get outta here! sarge: Will you turn that disrespectful junk off? Filmore: Respect the classics, man. Mater: He's done. He must've finished it while we was all sleepin'. Doc: Good riddance. Flo: He's gone? Sarge: Well, we wouldn't want him to miss that race of his. Sheriff: Hisk...hisk. Ramone: Oh, dude, are you crying? Sheriff: No! I'm happy! I don't have to watch him every second of the day anymore! I'm glad he's gone! Red: Hahaha. McQueen: What's wrong with Red? Mater: Oh, he's just sad 'cause you left town, and went to your big race to win the Piston Cup that you've always dreamed about your whole life and get that big ol' sponsor and that fancy helicopter you was talkin' about. Mater: Huuhh! Wait a minute! Folks: Hahaha. Mater: I knowed you wouldn't leave without saying goodbye. McQueen: Hahaha. Sheriff: What are you doin' here, son? You're gonna miss your race. Don't worry. I'll give you a police escort, and we'll make up the time. McQueen: Thank you, Sheriff. But you know I can't go just yet. Sheriff: Well, why not? McQueen: I'm not sure these tires...can get me all the way to California. Yeah, does anybody know what time Luigi's opens? Luigi: Ah..haha! I can't-a believe it! Luigi: Four new tires! Grazien, Mr. Lightning. Grazien! Flo: Would you look at that! Luigi: Our first real customers in years! I am filled with tears of ecstacy, for this is the most glorious day of my life! McQueen: All right, Luigi, give me the best set of blackwalls you've got. Luigi: No,no,no,no! You don't-a know what you want. Luigi know what you want. Blackwall tires. They blend into the pavement. But-a this...white-wall tires! They say, "Look at me! Here I am! Love me." McQueen: All right, you're the expert. Luigi: Eh, hehehee! McQueen: Oh, and don't forget the spare. Luigi: Perfetto. Guido! Guido: Peet stop! Song Luigi: Hahaha! What did Luigi tell you, aey? McQueen: Wow, you were right. Better than a Ferrari, huh? Luigi: Aaa, No. McQueen: Wow! This organic fuel is great! Why haven't I heard about it before? Filmore: It's a conspiracy, man! The oil companies got a grip on the government! They're feedin' us a bunch of lies, man. McQueen: OK, I'll take a case. Ramone: Ahh.. Yeah. Ka-chow. Mater: Here she comes! McQueen: Places, everybody. Hurry! Act natural. Folks: Hi, Sally. Sally: All right, what's goin' on? Mater: Ladies and gentlecars, please welcome the neeewww Lightning McQueen! McQueen: What do you think? Radiator Springs looks pretty good on me. Sally: I'll say. Rrr. Ka-chow. You're gonna fit right in in California. Oh my goodness. It looks like you've helped everybody in town. McQueen: Yeah, everybody except one. Hey, is it getting dark out? Lizzie: What? What'd he say? McQueen: Let me say that again. Is it getting dark out? Lizzie: Now, what was I supposed to do after that? Song Sally: They fixed their neon. Flo: Low and slow? Ramone: Oh, yeah, baby! McQueen: Just like in its heyday, right? Sally: It's even better than I pictured it. Thank you. McQueen: Shall we cruise? Lizzie: Oh, thank you, dear. I'd love to! McQueen: No,no,no. Sally: Lizzie! Lizzie: I remember when Stanley first asked me to take a drive with him. Mater: Hey, Miss sally. May I have this cruise? Sally: Of course, Mater. Sheriff: A,a,ah! Lizzie: ...and again and I said, "No," and he asked me again, and I said, "No." But, oh, he was a persistent little burger for a two-cylinder. Finally I said, "All right, one little drive." Mater: Hahaha. McQueen: Hey! Sally: Thanks, Mater. Mater: Good evenin', you two. Lizzie: Oh, Stanley, I wish you could see this. Flo: Is that what I think it is? Sally: Oh, I don't know, Flo. I haven't had a chance to find out. But I am going to find out. Hello. Flo: Not that. That. Sally: Huh. Customers? Flo: Customers, everybody! And a lot of 'em! You know what to do. Just like we rehearsed. Mater: It's the ghostlight! Helicopter: We have found McQueen. We have found McQueen! Cameramen: McQueen, over here! McQueen: Aaa, wait, excuse me. Cameramen: Is it true you've been in rehab? Cameramen: Did you have a nervous breakdown, McQueen. McQueen: I'm sorry, what? Cameramen: McQueen's wearing whitewalls! Cameramen: Are the tires you wearing are turning balding? Sally: Stickers, McQueen! Cameramen: Was Lightning McQueen your prisoner? Mater: Shoot, no! We're best buds! I ain't braggin' or nothin', but I was in charge of huntin' him down if he tried to escape. McQueen: Sally, Sally! Kori: McQueen! Will you still race for the Piston Cup? Sally: Stickers? McQueen: Sally! Cameramen: Come on, give us some bolt! Mack: You're here! Thank the manufacturer! You're alive! McQueen: Mack? Mack: You're here! I can't belive it! Oh, hoho. You are a sight for some headlights! I'm so sorry I lost you, boss. I'll make it up to you! McQueen: Mack, I, I can't belive you're here. Harv: Is that the world's fastest racing machine? McQueen: Is that Harv? Mack: Yeah. He's in the back. Cameramen: Show us the bolt, McQueen! Mack: Get back, you oil-thirsty parasites! Cameramen: Hey, where's the old McQueen? Mack: Actually, this is my good side here. Cameramen: Show us the bolt! McQueen: Harv! Harv! Cameramen: Give us the bolt! McQueen: Harv? Cameramen: Come on! Harv: Kid, I'm over here! McQueen: How you doin', buddy? Harv: My star client disappears off the face of the earth! How do you think I'm doing? McQueen: Harv, I can explain. Harv: I'm doing great! You're everywhere, baby! Radio, TV, the papers! You can't buy this kind of publicity! What do you need me for? That's just a figure of speech, by the way. You signed a contract. Where are you? I can't even find you on my GPS. McQueen: I'm in this little town called Radiator Springs. You know Route 66? It's still here! Harv: Yeah, that's great, kid. Playtime is over, pal. While the world's been trying to find you, Dinoco has had no one to woo. Who are they gonna woo? McQueen: Chick! Harv: Bingo. In fact, check out what's on the plasma right now. Cameramen: Show us the thunder! Chick: You want thunder? You want thunder? Ka-chicka, ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! McQueen: Hey, that's my bit! Harv: You've gotta get to Cali, pronto! Just get out of Radiation Stinks now, or Dinoco is history, you hear me? McQueen: Just give me a second here, Harv. Harv: No,no,no, wait. Where are goin'. Get in the trailer, baby. Kid! You want, you want a bigger trailer? McQueen: Sally, I...I want you to... Look, I wish...Ahhhh. Sally: Thank you. Thanks for everything. McQueen: Ah. Haha. It just a road. Sally: No. It was much more than that. Mack: Hey, kid! We gotta go. Harv's goin' crazy! He's gonna have me fired if I don't get you in the truck right now! McQueen: Mack, just... hold it for... Sally: You should go. McQueen: I know, but... Sally: Good luck in California. I hope you find what you're looking for. Cameramen: McQueen, come on! McQueen: Sally! Cameramen: Show us the bolt, McQueen! The bolt! Hey, Lightning, show us the bolt! Cameramen: Where's the old McQueen? Harv: Come on, get in the trailer. That's it. That's right kid, let's go! You're a big shining star. You're a superstar. You don't belong there, anyway. McQueen: Whoa... Wait...Whoa,whoa,wait,wait! Cameramen: Hey, guys! McQueen's leavin' in the truck! Kori: Hey, are you Doc Hudson? Doc: Yeah. Kori: Thanks for the call. Sally: You called them? Doc: It's best for everyone, Sally. Sally: Best for everyone, or best for you? Mater: I didn't get to say goodbye to him. Bob: Hello, race fans, and welcome to what has become, quite simply, the biggest event in the history of racing. A three way battle for the Piston Cup! Darrell: There's a crowd of nearly 200,000 cars here at the Los Angeles International Speedway. Tickets to this race are hotter than a black leather seat on a hot summer day! Bob: The King, Chick Hicks and Lightning McQueen in a 200 laps, winner-takes-all, tiebreaker race. Darrell: You know I got a lotta miles on me, but let me tell you somethin' buddy. I never thought I'd see anything like this. Wow! Man. This is exciting! Bob: In fact, the country has almost shut down, to watch what many experts are calling "the race of the century." Junior: Hey, King! Good luck in your last race. You've sure been an inspiration to me. The King: Thanks, Junior. Appreciate it. Dear: Hey, be careful out there, OK? The King: Yeah, mam. Mia: He's hot. Chick: Wanna know the forecast? I'll give you the forecast. A 100 percent chance of thunder! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Say it with me! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Security: Hey, you! No admittance without a garage pass. Fred: Oh, it's OK. Lightning McQueen knows me! Andretti: Hey, Marco, it's a beautiful day for a race, isn't it? Security: Absolutely, Mr. Andretti. Andretti: And good morning to you, Fred. Fred: Mario Andretti he knows my name! You gotta let me in now! Security: Sorry, pal. McQueen: OK, here we go. Focus. Speed. I am speed. Victory, one winner, two losers. Speed. Speed. Speed. Speed... Mack: Hey, Lightnin'! You ready? McQueen: Yeah, yeah, yeah! I'm...I'm ready. McQueen: Mack, thanks for being my pit crew today. Mack: Nahh. Don't worry about it, kid. It's the least I could do. After all, "Gas Can" is my middle name. McQueen: It is? Mack: Nahh, not really. Small aeroplane: A. O. TV Crew: Nelson! Zoom in. Ready, 16? Take 16. Bob: And there he is, Lightning McQueen! Missing all week, and then he turns up in the middle of nowhere! In a little town called Radiator Springs. Darrell: Wearin' whitewall tires, of all things. Chick: Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Hahaha. Hey, where you been? I've been kinda lonely. Nobody to hang out with. I mean, except the Dinoco folks. Ohhh and the twins. Of course. You know the twins the one that used to be your fans, but now they're my fans. Anyway, listen to what the twins think... McQueen: Ahh. Shoot! Fans: Boogity, boogity, boogity, boys! Let's go racin'! Dear: Come on, you can do it! Tex: Come on kid, make us proud, boy! Bob: Fifty laps down, and The King is still holding a slim lead. Darrell: Hey, McQueen's got a run on him! He's lookin' to the inside! Ohh! Chick slammed the door on him! Bob: Chick's not making it easy on him today. Darrell: Oh, man, he lost so much momentum, and now he's gonna have to chase him back down! Bob: Ohhh, McQueen spins out in the infield! Chick: Hahaha! Just me and the old man, fellas. McQueen just doesn't have it today. Mack: Hey, kid, are you all right? McQueen: I don't know, Mack. I..I... I don't think I... Doc: I didn't come all this way to see you quit. McQueen: Doc? Guys: Yey.. Hahaha. McQueen: Guys, you're here! I can't believe this! Doc: I knew you needed a crew chief, but I didn't know it was this bad. McQueen: I thought you said you'd never come back. Doc: Well, I really didn't have a choice. Mater didn't get to say goodbye. Mater: Goodbye!! Okay, I'm good. McQueen: Hahaha! Doc: All right, if you can drive as good as you fix a road, then you can win this race with you eyes shut. Now, get back out there! Hot snot, we are back in business! Guido! Luigi! You're goin' up against professional pit crews boys, you're gonna have to be fast. Luigi: They will not know what bit them! Doc: Kid, you can beat these guys. Find a groove that works for you and get that lap back. Chick's Crew: Is that? Chick's Crew: Oh, wow. That's him! TV Crew: Is that...? That's the Hudson Hornet! Bob, Darrell! The Hudson Hornet's back! Bob: Darrell, it appears McQueen has got himself a pit crew. And look who he has for a crew chief! Fans: Wow... Look, man. It's the Hudson Hornet! Biggest fan: Whoa!! Fans: Well, dip me in axle grease and call me Slick! It surely is. Biggest fan: Hahahahaha! Bob: Wow, this is history in the making. Nobody has seen the racing legend in over 50 years! Lizzie: Hey, Doc! Come look at the fellow on the radio. He looks just like you. Bob: McQueen passes them on the inside! Darrell: But he's still nearly a lap fail. Bob: Can he catch up to them with only 60 laps to go? Doc: You're goin' great, kid. Just keep your head on. Guido: Vai! Vai! Vai,vai! Chick's crew: Hey, shrimpie, where did McQueen find you, huh? Those round things are called tires, and they go under the car! All Chick's Crew: Hahahahaha!!! Guido: Con chi credi di parlare? Ma, con chi stai parlando? Luigi: No! No, no! You'll have your chance. You will have your chance. Chick: Oh, kid's just tryin' to be a hero, huh? Well, what do you think of this? Yeah, that's it kid. Whats?? Mater: Whoa! Git-R-done! Hahaha! I taught him that. Ka-chow! Chick Crew: Auuww! Bob: What a move by McQueen! He's caught up to the leaders. Darrell: Oh, yeah. This is what it's all about. A three-way battle for the lead, with ten to go. Tex: Hahaha! Look at that boy go out there! Chick: No, you don't. McQueen: Doc, I'm flat! I'm flat! Doc: Can you get back to the pits? McQueen: Yeah, yeah. I think so. Doc: Hey, got a yellow. Bring it in. Don't tear yourself up, kid. Mack: We gotta get him back out there fast or we're gonna be a lap down, and we'll never win this race! Doc: Guido! It's time. Chick Crew: Hey, tiny, you gonna clean his windshield? Hahaha! Darrell: I don't believe it! Bob: That was the fastest pit stop I've ever seen! Darrell: It was a great stop, but he's still gotta beat that pace car out! Bob: It's gonna be close. Mater: Yeah!! Biggest Fan: Yeah, baby!! Fans: Yeah... Hahaha! Darrell: Yeah!! He's back in the race! Guido: Peet stop. Luigi: Guido, you did it! Mater: Way to go, Guido! Ramone: Yeah!! Bob: This is it. We're heading into the final lap and McQueen is right behind the leaders. What a comeback! Darrell: A hundred and ninety-nine laps, and, baby, it all comes down to this! Doc: This is it, kiddo. You've got four turns left. One at a time. Drive it in deep and hope it sticks. Go! Chick: We'll see about that! Bob: McQueen's going inside! Bob: Chick and The King are loose! Darrell: I think McQueen is out of the race! Darrell: McQueen saved it! Bob: He's back on the track! Doc: Float like a Cadillac... McQueen: Sting like a Beemer! Biggest Fan: Ka-chow, ka-chow, ka-chow! Fans: Wooowww! Folks: Yeeehaaaa! Hahaha. Darrell: Lightning McQueen is gonna win the Piston Cup! Sally: Come on! You got it! You got it, Stickers! Chick: I am not comin' in behind you again, old man. Dear: Oh, no! Chick: Yeah... Woooww! I won, baby! Yeah! Oh, yeah! Flo: What's he up to, Doc? The King: What are you doin', kid? McQueen: I think The King should finish his last race. The King: You just gave up the Piston Cup, you know that? McQueen: Ahhh. This grumpy old racecar I know once told me somethin'. It's just an empty cup. Bob: Darrell, is pushing on the last lap legal? Darrell: Hey, man. He's not really pushin' him. He's just givin' him a little bump draft. Chick: Whoaa.. Hohooo!! Hey. What? What's goin' on? Fan: That's what I call racin' right there. Tex: Hahaha! Luigi: Bravo il mio amico! Mater: Way to go, buddy! Filmore: There's a lotta love out there, you know, man? Sarge: Don't embarrass me, Filmore. Lizzie: That's my hot rod. Chick: Come on, baby, bring it out! Bring out the Piston Cup! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Yeah! Now, that's what I'm talkin' about! Hey, how come I'm the only one celebrating is me, huh? Where are the girls? Bring on the confetti! Auuww! Auuww! Easy with the confetti. What's goin' on? Come on, snap some pictures. I gotta go sign my deal with Dinoco! Ka-chicka! Say it with me. Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Cameramen: Booo! Mia & Tia: Booo! Chick: What's wrong with everybody? Where's the happiness? Hey! This is the start of the Chick era! Dear: Thanks, Lightnin'. McQueen: You're welcome. Fan: Way to go, King! Fan: You're still the car! Biggest Fan: You're The King! Yeah! Rust-eze Folks: Yeah! Hahahaha! Mack: Wahh! Hoo! Rust-eze Car: You make us proud, kid! Mack: Congrats on the loss, me bucko! Doc: You got a lotta of stuff, kid. McQueen: Thanks, Doc. Tex: Hey, Lightnin'. How 'bout comin' over here and talk to me a minute? Son, that was some real racin' out there. How'd you like to become the new face of Dinoco? McQueen: But I didn't win. Tex: Lightnin', there's a whole lot more to racin' than just winnin'. Rust-eze Van: He was so rusty, when he drove down the street. Hahaha. Buzzards used to circle the car! Folks: Hahahaha. McQueen: Thank, you, Mr. Tex, but...but these Rust-eze guys over there gave me my big break. I'm gonna stick with them. Tex: Well, I sure can respect that. Still, you know, if there's ever anything I can do for you, just let me know. McQueen: I sure appreciate that. Thank you. Actually, there is one thing. Mater: Whoah! Hoo! Aaaa! Hey look at me! I'm flyin', by golly! Whoahh! Hoo! I'm happier than a tornado in a trailer park! Luigi: I think it's about-a time we redecorate. Michael Schumacker: Chow! Hi, Lightning McQueen told me this was the best place in the world to get tires. How 'bout setting me and my friends up with three or four sets each? Luigi: Huh. Guido! There is a real Michael Schumacker Ferrari in my store. A real Ferrari! Punch me, Guido. Punch me in the face. This is the most glorious day of my life. Michael Schumacker: Wow. Spero che il tuo amico si riprenda. Mi dicono che siete fantastici. Sally: Uh..huh!. Hahaha. Just passin' through? McQueen: Actually, I thought I'd stop and stay awhile. I hear this place is back on the map. Sally: It is? McQueen: Yeah, there's some rumor floating around that some hotshot Piston Cup racecar is setting up his big racing headquarters here. Sally: Really? Well, there goes the town. McQueen: You know, I really missed you, Sally. Sally: Well, I create feelings in others they themselves don't understand and, blah, blah, blah, blah. McQueen: Hahaha. Mater: McQueen and Sally parked beneath the tree, K-i-s-s...i-n-t! McQueen: Great timing, Mater! Mater: Hep-non, hip-hep, hi-li-lilly! Weeeee!! McQueen: He's my best friend. What're you gonna do? Sally: So, Stickers, last one to Flo's buys? McQueen: I don't know. Why don't we just take a drive? Sally: Mmm. Nahh. McQueen: Yeah! Ka-chow! Mater: Yeeeehoooo!!!!!

0 notes

theworstbob · 7 years ago

Text

scattered thoughts about the ninth season of american ninja warrior

the stats used in this post are from the index of anw stats i’ve been keeping for three years, which was compiled with a combination of Sasukepedia and the notes i take watching each episode and was created because Sasukepedia has auto-play ads that make it load like garbage, and also because shit I was keeping stats anyway might as well share them with anyone who has the link. Now YOU can “well, actually...” every time the announcers say some bullshit about their history!

Los Angeles LAX1) Sean Bryan: CLEAR (5:07.22) LAX2) Adam Rayl: CLEAR (5:07.92) LAX3) Charlie Andrews: CLEAR (6:02.21) LAX4) Josh Levin: CLEAR (6:27.98) LAX5) Flip Rodriguez: Failed Elevator Climb LAX6) Gabe Hurtado: Failed Elevator Climb LAX7) Brian Wilczewski: Failed Stair Hopper LAX8) Kevin Bull: Failed Stair Hopper LAX9) Robin Pietschmann: Failed Stair Hopper LAX10) Jackson Meyer: Failed Stair Hopper LAX11) Kapu Gaison: Failed Swinging Peg Board LAX12) Steve Seiver: Failed Swinging Peg Board LAX13) Benjamin Humphrys: Failed Swinging Peg Board LAX14) Nick Hanson: Failed Swinging Peg Board LAX15) David Campbell: Failed Swinging Peg Board LAX16) Rebekah Bonilla: Failed Swinging Peg Board LAX17) Zhanique Lovett: Failed Warped Wall

~I was so bummed when Sean Bryan sniped the top time from Adam Rayl. I thought Adam Rayl was putting together a nice little narrative for himself, going from walk-on to stage two to what would likely hold up as the nation’s top finals time (still looking for that sub-5!), and then this relative no one hits the button seven-tenths of a second faster, and that’s just such a bummer. I mean, it’s not important, ANW dropped the “top finals time” thing after season four (and after both Drechsel and Flip flamed out in season six; it’s less hype when Jeremiah Morgan is the last man to run, innit), but man, that should’ve been Rayl’s. How dare Sean Bryan be slightly better.

~But dude, West Coast is suddenly nuts. Three years ago, zero people cleared the First Stage, and then last year they added Flip and Rayl and Levin and now LA is the city with the most finals course finishers and the most notable competitors. You have three of the dudes who cleared the First Stage last season, three more dudes with First Stage clears to their name, two first-timers to Vegas who are more than capable of clearing the First Stage, and one of the women capable of clearing the Warped Wall. (Rebekah Bonilla! Didn’t see that coming!) And that’s with Grant McCartney getting dropped by the Salmon Ladder! West Coast suddenly has a really strong set of ninjas, and while I’m bummed he’s out -- he’s not a serious threat for kanzenseiha, but he’s a fun watch -- I’m so stoked to see David Campbell get another chance.

~hahaha i didn’t even realize i only made two notes about the LA Finals hey guys guess which episode aired the earliest

San Antonio SAN1) Daniel Gil: CLEAR (5:50.65) SAN2) Thomas Stillings: Failed Elevator Climb SAN3) Nicholas Coolridge: Failed Elevator Climb SAN4) Brent Steffensen: Failed Elevator Climb SAN5) Karsten Williams: Failed Spinball Wizard SAN6) Andrew Lowes: Failed Spinball Wizard SAN7) Josh Salinas: Failed Hourglass Drop SAN8) Brian Burkhardt: Failed Hourglass Drop SAN9) Damir Okanovic: Failed Hourglass Drop SAN10) Matt Holt: Failed Hourglass Drop SAN11) Grant Clinton: Failed Hourglass Drop SAN12) Abel Gonzalez: Failed Hourglass Drop SAN13) Brandon Pannell: Failed Hourglass Drop SAN14) Cass Clawson: Failed Hourglass Drop SAN15) Jody Avila: Failed Hourglass Drop SAN16) Barclay Stockett: Failed Hourglass Drop SAN17) Kacy Catanzaro: Failed Warped Wall

~Daniel Gil’s freakin’ amazing. That dude’s so good and still so young that it’s actually infuriating, and he’s at a point in his ninja career where he’s on that top line of stars with Drechsel and Graff and Moravsky and all them, but he’s not the guy (and likely never will be unless Drew Drechsel’s legs are stolen by warlocks), so he gets to be the guy in San Antonio who delivers the clear at the last second but doesn’t have to be that same guy in Vegas, which is probably a pretty cool feeling.

~So is this gonna be like a thing, where every other year Brent Steffensen is trying to bounce back from some past failure? I think we might be at a point in ANW’s life where we can admit, yeah, Brent Steffensen did a really cool thing in season four, but that was five years ago, it was more a result of the circumstance than anything else, and we don’t have to consider this guy a real contender anymore. Like, if we’re montaging David Campbell, we’re at least considering the same for Brent Steffensen, right? I mean, hooray, he made the last Finals obstacle, that’s really cool and his best city finals result in years, but how long can we milk the comeback tour angle before it gets stale?

~Kacy Catanzaro is evidently retiring, and this seems like the best thing for both parties. I think it’ll be good for Catanzaro to try other ventures where she doesn’t have to put this incredible pressure on herself, and I think the show’s going to be better off not trying to ride the coattails of the season six run. Because the season six run was this crazy, once-in-a-lifetime thing, right? But the thing about once in a lifetime events is, they only happen once, as the last three seasons have proved. Kacy Catanzaro is crazy talented, but the show has evolved to this point where the Finals courses don’t cater to the particular talents Catanzaro has in the same way that ANW6 Dallas course did. I hope she does well in her next athletic endeavor.

~Andrew Lowes qualified for Vegas. Why is this notable? So in the six years ANW has done Vegas finals, two men have made it to Vegas all six years: Brian Arnold (MS3, DEN3, DEN3, KCT12, IND3, DEN11) Travis Rosen (SE3, MIA4, STL11, ORL6, ATL3, DAY5) And these are the 10 people who have made it to Vegas five of the six years: David Campbell (NW3, VEN4, VEN1, VEN3, dnq, LAX15) Kacy Catanzaro (dnp, VENWC, DAL7, HOUWC, OKCWC, SAN17) Drew Drechsel (SE2, MIA1, dnq, ORL4, ATL2, DAY1) Andrew Lowes (MW12, BAL6, STL13, dnq, OKC9, SAN6) James McGrath (NW1, VEN1, VEN3, ORL1, ATL1, dnq) Joe Moravsky (dnp, BAL2, STL1, PIT2, PHI2, CLE1) Jamie Rahn (dnq, BAL8, STL6, PIT3, PHI4, CLE2) Flip Rodriguez (SE1, MIA2, dnq, ORL3, LAX7, LAX5) Brent Steffensen (SW5, VENWC, dnq, HOU8, OKC10, SAN4) Ryan Stratis (dnq, MIA8, MIA3, SPD3, PHI9, DAY13) That is a hell of a list Lowes is on. The crazy thing is, he might’ve had six Vegas trips had he not been the victim of season seven’s Balance Obstacle From Hell. It’s remarkable consistency, especially considering he’s the only one on the list that hasn’t cleared a city finals course. It’s hard to appreciate consistency, especially when it gets montaged so often, but here’s a salute to Andrew Lowes.

~And also to Karsten Williams, who’s going to Vegas for the fourth consecutive year. Only eight other ninjas currently have Vegas streaks as long or longer: Arnold, Rosen, Catanzaro, Moravsky, Rahn, Stratis, Ian Dory, and Meagan Martin.

~I haven’t even mentioned Thomas Stillings, Nicholas Coolridge, or Abel Gonzalez! This field is hella loaded!

Daytona Beach DAY1) Drew Drechsel: CLEAR (7:34.60) DAY2) JJ Woods: Failed Elevator Climb DAY3) Sean Darling-Hammond: Failed Elevator Climb DAY4) Jessie Graff: Failed Elevator Climb DAY5) Travis Rosen: Failed Circuit Board DAY6) Casidy Marks: Failed Circut Board DAY7) Tyler Gillett: Failed Circuit Board DAY8) Kevin Carbone: Failed Circuit Board DAY9) Rigel Henry: Failed Giant Cubes DAY10) Nick Patel: Failed Giant Cubes DAY11) Lucas Gomes: Failed Giant Cubes DAY12) Reko Rivera: Failed Giant Cubes DAY13) Ryan Stratis: Failed Giant Cubes DAY14) Dustin Fishman: Failed Giant Cubes DAY15) Michael Johnson: Failed Giant Cubes DAY16) Lindsay Eskildsen: Failed Rolling Thunder

~Drew Drechsel and Jessie Graff are really, really good at this sport. This has been valuable analysis. I’m so stoked to see them in Vegas, as well as in Sasuke 34.

~Yo, shouts to Reko Rivera! That dude has been around since ANW4, and he’s finally getting his first shot at Vegas! I am completely baffled by rhe choice to not show the moment Rivera got in on the broadcast. That would have been such a cool moment for a dude who��s been on this show for six years, and he gets pushed to the wayside for Rigel Henry’s dudebro aesthetic? I don’t get it. This episode could have been much more memorable than it ended up being; Jessie Graff and Drew Drechsel compensated for a lot of same-y dudes failing the same obstacle. I dunno, would’ve been cool for the show to do right by its longtime competitors.

~Of course, this is the same show that accepted an obstacle submission from Kevin Carbone, then made him wait in the walk-on line to prove he deserved to run the course. I have no idea what editing room wizardry ANW pulled off to make it look like Kevin Carbone didn’t think that was some bullshit, but bravah to them. If I were Kevin Carbone, I wouldn’t have given them any usable footage. I gave these dudes Wingnuts, and they made me waste days of my life. Nah, dudes. Y’all can cut me from the broadcast.

Kansas City KCT1) Mitch Vedepo: Failed Elevator Climb KCT2) Tyler Yamauchi: Failed Iron Maiden KCT3) Hunter Guerard: Failed Floating Monkey Bars KCT4) Eric Middleton: Failed Floating Monkey Bars KCT5) Dave Cavanagh: Failed Floating Monkey Bars KCT6) Lance Pekus: Failed Floating Monkey Bars KCT7) Jeremiah Morgan: Failed Floating Monkey Bars KCT8) Jelani Allen: Failed Floating Monkey Bars KCT9) Alex Carson: Failed Floating Monkey Bars KCT10) Kyle Mendoza: Failed Salmon Ladder KCT11) Spencer Johnson: Failed Salmon Ladder KCT12) Brad Spine: Failed Salmon Ladder KCT13) Ben Baker: Failed Salmon Ladder KCT14) "Moose" Wright: Failed Salmon Ladder KCT15) Donovan Metoyer: Failed Bar Hop KCT16) Maggi Thorne: Failed Bar Hop KCT17) Sara Hessen: Failed Crank It Up

~BALANCE OBSTACLE FROM HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL So Adam Arnold would’ve been a notable name for the BOFH’s ever-expanding list no matter what; he cleared city finals courses the last two years, and regardless of his Vegas performances, anyone with that patch in their past is a threat to go far. But yo, balance obstacle went HAM in the finals. Dan Polizzi is only a big name in the context of the Midwest qualifiers, which, see the next note, but Brandon Mears and Ethan Swanson (especially Ethan Swanson) are dudes who never had to think about the balance obstacle in the past, and then there they were, in the drink. The balance obstacle, man. You never can tell which one, but every year, it hecks up one city completely.

~But it’s especially devastating for Kansas City, because this was one of the weaker fields in recent memory. A quick comparison: Ninja A: 4 City Finals course clears, 5 First Stage clears, 2 Stage Two clears Ninja B: 5 City Finals course clears, 4 First Stage clears, 1 Stage Two clear Ninja C: 4 City Finals course clears, 4 First Stage clears, 2 Stage Two clears Ninja A is Drew Drechsel; Ninja B is the entire Kansas City field. Ninja C is Joe Moravsky. There’s not a clear #1 in this bunch. Lance Pekus is a quality athlete but nowhere near Regional #1 material (not when other regions have Gils or Dorys or Levins), the show seems to have a weird thing against Jeremiah Morgan that may or may not be fair, and boy do I not need to hear Mears and Dan Polizzi shout ‘bro’ a million times every time they’re on screen. The fact I’m even bringing up Dan Polizzi and his two Vegas trips speaks to how enh this Kansas City field is. It’s not really a surprise that there were no finishers, though it is surprising the field was so decimated that it sent a dude to Vegas that didn’t even make it to the Warped Wall. The only other time that happened was Venice in season 7, and that only happened because the Hourglass Drop was so horribly designed. (It still sucks, tbh.) Donovan Metoyer is going to Vegas because the other 15 dudes got hecked. I wonder, if they do six cities next season, you’ll see fringey dudes from the San Antonio or Denver regions go a little out of their way to compete in the Midwest field; someone like, say, Jonathan Horton would be a cinch.

~Tyler Yamauchi came super close, though! That was such a fun run to watch, even if it ended with one of the more baffling decisions in recent Ninja history. (ONE PEG LOWER. YOU CAN SEE THE PEG. YOU ARE EYE LEVEL WITH THE PEG. WHY WOULD YOU NOT USE THAT PEG, TYLER. THEY HECKED UP THE DESIGN OF THE OBSTACLE TO GIVE YOU A FREE JUMP!) Mitch Vedepo earns the distinction (?) of being the #1 athlete out of the region, but Tyler Yamauchi is certainly #1 in our hearts. I hope that dude does well in Vegas; he got a hella hero edit, which suggests either Vegas success or the producers really needed Kansas City to not be completely unwatchable.

~Kyle Mendoza was also a fun run, even if it ended with him going “fuck it!” and trying for style points on the Salmon Ladder. He ran pretty early, but I think he could kinda tell the depth of the field and knew if he got to the Salmon Ladder super fast he’d be golden, and he was (probably?) the only one who cleared the KCT qualifying course in under two minutes. (I mean, we didn’t see Hunter Guerard’s run, and that dude seemed pretty speedy, but I’m sure if Guerard went faster we would’ve seen it.) I liked that guy.

Cleveland CLE1) Joe Moravsky: CLEAR (7:24:10) CLE2) Jamie Rahn: CLEAR (8:39.85) CLE3) Jon Alexis, Jr.: Failed Nail Clipper CLE4) Mike Meyers: Failed Nail Clipper CLE5) Judas Licciardello: Failed Nail Clipper CLE6) Michael Torres: Failed Nail Clipper CLE7) Dan Galiczynski: Failed Nail Clipper CLE8) Mike Bernardo: Failed Nail Clipper CLE9) Anthony DeFranco: Failed Nail Clipper CLE10) Chris DiGangi: Failed Nail Clipper CLE11) Matthew Ilgenfritz: Failed Nail Clipper CLE12) Tyler Cravens: Failed Nail Clipper CLE13) Najee Richardson: Failed Nail Clipper CLE14) Samer Delgado: Failed Nail Clipper CLE15) Jesse LaBreck: Failed Nail Clipper CLE16) Allyssa Beird: Failed Nail Clipper

~So I think it is overall a Good Thing that ANW is opening more Finals spots specifically for female competitors. But removing wild cards from the equation completely creates this weird bind where there’s so many talented women in the Northeast region vying for just two spots, and then you go to Kansas City with its set of randos what couldn’t make it to the Warped Wall. Like, it’s not fair that Michelle Warnky is one of six women to make it to the eighth obstacle of a city finals course, but won’t be one of the twelve women going to Vegas. Like, what, is she supposed to abandon this specific region she’s been competing in for five years to go to the Midwest and take advantage of Kansas City’s weak field? I mean, it’s awesome that there’s one region with that many women capable of getting that far on the course, but it’s a drag that Michelle Warnky won’t be able to run in Vegas despite doing something really cool.

~James McGrath :(. I’m sure he was hurt, but hoo boy, that was a tough run to watch, especially since he came so close to clearing the Nail Clipper, like, he’d be going to Vegas if he could have generated just a teensy bit more momentum. It’s one of those things where, he was gonna miss Vegas eventually, everyone has one Shocking Failure, and McGrath has had a rough go of things ever since looking so invincible in ANW5, but it’s still really shocking to see him go out so early, kinda stunning that there’s gonna be a Vegas Finals without him. Really hope he can recover.

~Najee Richardson got hella hero edit, too, despite finishing 13th among the Philly qualifiers, and I can’t tell if that’s because he’s going to do well in Vegas or because ANW wants to signal that they’re a fine home for former amateur athletes looking for an outlet for the skills they spent years honing. Like, I’m honestly stunned Tim Tebow hasn’t embraced destiny and submitted a tape.

Denver DEN1) Ian Dory: CLEAR (6:56.33) DEN2) Lorin Ball: Failed Ninjago Roll DEN3) Jesse Lucero: Failed Ninjago Roll DEN4) Karson Voiles: Failed The Wedge DEN5) Ryan Souter: Failed The Wedge DEN6) Dan Yager: Failed The Wedge DEN7) Craig Richard: Failed The Wedge DEN8) Bart Copeland: Failed The Wedge DEN9) Drew Knapp: Failed The Wedge DEN10) Ben Antoine: Failed The Wedge DEN11) Brian Arnold: Failed The Wedge DEN12) Yancey Quezada: Failed The Wedge DEN13) Luke Chambers: Failed The Wedge DEN14) Michael Silenzi: Failed The Wedge DEN15) Nick Kostreski: Failed The Wedge DEN16) Meagan Martin: Failed The Wedge DEN17) Jeri D'Aurelio: Failed Rail Runner

~Every single time a competitor got to the top of the Elevator Climb I was scared they were gonna slip off. Like, climbing up through the hole was fine with the Spider Climb and Invisible Ladder, but given how gross the Elevator Climb is, there’s gotta be a better way to finish the obstacle than to make exhausted people throw their legs up and hope for the best. Like, watching Ian Dory made me so nervous. Like, elevators have doors. Why not have them climb to a door?

~But yo: Ian Dory’s legit. One of five dudes with four finals course clears under his belt (Arnold, Drechsel, McGrath, Moravsky), and the only one to get all four of those clears in consecutive seasons. There’s some temptation to write Dory off as solely an upper-body guy, and while climbing obstacles are certainly his forte, you don’t notch four straight finisher patches (or two First Stage clears) without being an impressive athlete overall. You can see how much nonsense these courses can offer; you have Rolling Logs and Balance Obstacles From Hell and all these opportunities to make mental mistakes and the occasional bullshit obstacle like, say, The Wedge. That Ian Dory was able to deal with The Wedge should be more than enough to place him among the top-tier ninjas; honestly, of anyone not named Drew Drechsel, I think Ian Dory has the best shot at kanzenseiha.

~But speaking of streaks! We already referenced that Brian Arnold was one of the two men to make it to Vegas every season, but holy cats, Brian Arnold has made it to Vegas every season. That’s crazy. Brian Arnold and Travis Rosen are crazy. This definitely isn’t the way he wanted to qualify, being one of the 16 or 17 (RIP Matt Reeves, and everyone else from all the regions who got cut) people to reach The Wedge and letting that be enough, but all that matters is he got there and kept the streak alive.

~ninjago roll lol why not

~Lorin Ball, Denver #2. If I had made a thousand predictions for this season of ANW, I don’t think I would have made that one. If you had given me the opportunity to bet on a match between Lorin Ball and The Wedge, I would bet a thousand lifetimes of savings on The Wedge without asking any further questions. Lorin Ball getting to Vegas, yeah, absolutely, he qualified four of five seasons and can beast through at least the Salmon Ladder, but a #2? Damn, dude. Way to transcend all expectations. (This is also the second time Lorin Ball’s made it to the ninth obstacle in city finals in the three seasons since ANW enhanced the difficulty. That’s legit, especially given how nonsense The Wedge is.)

Vegas Preview

So in my notes, I refer to people by their qualifying positions because ANW doesn’t do the saddlecloth thing Sasuke does, and I like being able to reference Drew Drechsel in any given season as DAY1 or ATL2 in ANW and 96-33 in Sasuke. But! Since Jesse LaBreck and Jessie Graff qualified through the top 15, we actually have an even 100 people going to Vegas (90 qualifiers, 10 de facto wild cards), which means we can do a fun experiment with ANW SADDLECLOTHS!

Bolded names are finishers, asterisks denote if the competitor has reached Stage Two or the Third Stage. When building the list, I didn’t just put my eye on least-likely-to-clear to most-. I wanted the x0 and x1 slots to be a bit hype; everyone n2-n9 is sort of junked in there haphazardly until 61 or so, but I wanted to build it so that each 1-10 was sort of like a mini section, with 1 being a particularly hype runner (for example: Cass Clawson was a hair away from clearing the First Stage in ANW6, so he’s the pick to kick off the 11-20 section) and 10 being a particularly notable veteran (for example: Michael Silenzi’s been around since at least ANW4). I also wanted to put an emphasis on past accomplishment (which is why no runner with a Stage Two berth goes in the first half and why, say, LAX15 David Campbell is running in the 70s), but still make some room for less-decorated-but-nonetheless-notable dudes in the late goings (which is why CLE13 Najee Richardson runs in the 80s). This is a very stupid thing I have made and I am not a well person. 1) Reko Rivera (DAY12) 2) Donovan Metoyer (KCT15) 3) Nick Kostreski (DEN15) 4) Sara Hessen (KCT17) 5) Kapu Gaison (LAX11) 6) Michael Johnson (DAY15) 7) Jody Avila (SAN15) 8) Samer Delgado (CLE14) 9) Dustin Fishman (DAY14) 10) Michael Silenzi (DEN14) 11) Cass Clawson (SAN14) 12) Lindsay Eskildsen (DAY16) 13) Ben Baker (KCT13) 14) Benjamin Humphrys (LAX13) 15) Matt Holt (SAN10) 16) Luke Chambers (DEN13) 17) Brad Spine (KCT12) 18) Matthew Ilgenfritz (CLE11) 19) Nick Patel (DAY10) 20) Steve Seiver (LAX12) 21) Maggi Thorne (KCT16) 22) Brandon Pannell (SAN13) 23) Yancey Quezada (DEN12) 24) Jackson Meyer (LAX10) 25) Tyler Cravens (CLE12) 26) “Moose” Wright (KCT14) 27) Lucas Gomes (DAY11) 28) Zhanique Lovett (LAX17) 29) Robin Pietschmann (LAX9) 30) Chris DiGangi (CLE10) 31) Grant Clinton (SAN11) 32) Spencer Johnson (KCT11) 33) Rigel Henry (DAY9) 34) Ben Antoine (DEN10) 35) Kyle Mendoza (KCT10) 36) Damir Okanovic (SAN9) 37) Rebekah Bonilla (LAX16) 38) Jelani Allen (KCT8) 39) Bart Copeland (DEN8) 40) Nick Hanson (LAX14) 41) Drew Knapp (DEN9) 42) Kevin Carbone (DAY8) 43) Brian Burkhardt (SAN8) 44) Craig Richard (DEN7) 45) Tyler Gillett (DAY7) 46) Josh Salinas (SAN7) 47) Alex Carson (KCT9) 48) Anthony DeFranco (CLE9) 49) Jeri D’Aurelio (DEN17) 50) Jon Alexis, Jr. (CLE3) 51) Karson Voiles (DEN4)** 52) Dave Cavanagh (KCT5) 53) Mike Meyers (CLE4)** 54) Casidy Marks (DAY6) 55) Ryan Souter (DEN5) 56) Eric Middleton (KCT4) 57) Judas Licciardello (CLE5) 58) Barclay Stockett (SAN16) 59) Gabe Hurtado (LAX6) 60) Andrew Lowes (SAN6)** 61) Sean Darling-Hammond (DAY3) 62) Hunter Guerard (KCT3) 63) Dan Yager (DEN6)** 64) Brian Wilczewski (LAX7)** 65) Jesse Lucero (DEN3) 66) Karsten Williams (SAN5) 67) Dan Galiczynski (CLE7)** 68) Tyler Yamauchi (KCT2) 69) Michael Bernardo (CLE8)** 70) Charlie Andrews (LAX3) 71) Lorin Ball (DEN2)** 72) Kacy Catanzaro (SAN17) 73) David Campbell (LAX15)*** 74) Michael Torres (CLE6)** 75) Jeremiah Morgan (KCT7)*** 76) JJ Woods (DAY2)** 77) Allyssa Bierd (CLE16) 78) Abel Gonzalez (SAN12)*** 79) Brent Steffensen (SAN4)*** 80) Lance Pekus (KCT6)** 81) Mitch Vedepo (KCT1) 82) Najee Richardson (CLE13)** 83) Nicholas Coolridge (SAN5)** 84) Sean Bryan (LAX1) 85) Jesse LaBreck (CLE15) 86) Ryan Stratis (DAY13)*** 87) Kevin Bull (LAX8)*** 88) Jamie Rahn (CLE2)** 89) Thomas Stillings (SAN2)** 90) Adam Rayl (LAX2)** 91) Meagan Martin (DEN16) 92) Josh Levin (LAX4)** 93) Travis Rosen (DAY5)*** 94) Ian Dory (DEN1)*** 95) Flip Rodriguez (LAX5)** 96) Brian Arnold (DEN11)*** 97) Joe Moravsky (CLE1)*** 98) Daniel Gil (SAN1)*** 99) Jessie Graff (DAY4)** 100) Drew Drechsel (DAY1)***

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creepersx35-blog · 8 years ago

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McQueen: OK... Here we go. Focus. Speed. I am speed. McQueen: One winner. 42 losers. I eat losers for breakfast. McQueen: Breakfast. Wait, maybe I should have had breakfast. A little breck-y could be good for me. No,no,no, stay focused. Speed. McQueen: I'm faster than fast. Quicker than quick. I am Lightning! Mack: (knock-knock)Hey Lightning, are you ready? McQueen: Oh, yeah. Lightning's ready. Song McQueen: Ka-chow! Song Seller: Get your antenna here! Fans: You got that right, Slick. Bob Cutlass: Welcome back to the Dinoco 400. I'm Bob Cutlass, here with my good friend, Darrel Cartrip. We're midway through what may turn out to be a historic day for racing. Darrel Cartrip: Bob, my oil pressure's through the roof right now. If this gets more exciting, they're gonna have to tow me outta the booth! Bob Cutlass: Right you are, Darrell. Three cars are tied for the season points lead, heading into the final race of the season. And the winner of this race Darrell, will win the season title and, the Piston Cup. Does The King, Strip Weathers, have one more victory in him before retirement? Darrell: He's been Dinoco's golden boy for years! Can he win them one last Piston Cup? Bob: And, as always, in the second place spot we find Chick Hicks. He's been chasing that tailfin his entire career. Darrell: Chick thought this was his year, Bob. His chance to finally emerge from The King's shadow. But the last thing he expected was...Lightning McQueen! Bob: You know, I don't think anybody expected this. The rookie sensation come into the season unknown. But everyone knows him now. Darrell: Will he be the first rookie to win a Piston Cup and land Dinoco? Bob: The legend, the runner up, and the rookie! Three cars, one champion! Song Chick: No you don't. Fans: Oohh. What a ride! Chick: Hahaha Fans: Go get'em, McQueen! Go get'em! Fans: We love you, Lightning! Chick: Dinoco is all mine. Race car: Ahhhh! Darrell: Trouble, turn three! Chick: Haha. Get through that, Mcqueen. Bob: Ouw.. A huge crash behind the leaders! Fans: Wahh!! Bob: Wait a second, Darrell. McQueen is in the wreckage. Darrell: There's no way the rookie can make it through! Not in one piece that is. Mia & Tia: Lightning, ahhh. Darrell: Look at that, McQueen made it through! Bob: Man, a spectacular move by Lightning McQueen. McQueen: Yeah! Ka-chow! Fans: McQueen (7X) Fan: Yeah McQueen! Ka-chow! Bob: While everyone else heads into the pits, McQueen stays out to take the lead! Broken car: Don't take me out coach. I can still race! Chick: Haha. What do you think boys? A thing of beauty. Chick's coach: McQueen made it through! Chick: What? Chick's coach: He's not pitting! Chick: Come on! Get me out there! Let's go! Get me back out there! Come on! Bob: McQueen's not going into the pits! Darrell: You know the rookie just fired his crew chief. That's the third one this season! Bob: Well he says he likes working alone Darrell. Chick's coach: Go, go, go! Bob: Looks like Chick got caught up in the pits. Darrell: Yeah, after a stop like that, he's got a lot of ground to make up.Get ready boys, we're coming to the restart! Chick: Come on, come on, come on! McQueen's crew: We need tires now! Come on, let's go! McQueen: No,no,no,no! No tires, just gas! McQueen's crew: What! You need tires, you idiot! Darrell: Looks like it's all gas-and-go's for McQueen today. Bob: That's right. No tires again. Darrell: Normally I said a short-term gain, long-term loss, but it's sure is workin' for him. He obviously knows somethin' we don't know. Bob: This is it Darrell, one lap to go and Lightning McQueen has a huge lead. Darrell: All he's got it in the bag. Call in the dogs and put out the fire! We're gonna crown us a new champion! McQueen: Checkered flag, here I come! Darrell: Oh, no! McQueen has blown a tire! Bob: And with only one turn to go! Can he make it? McQueen's crew: You fool! The King's Coach: McQueen's blown a tire!, McQueen's blown a tire! Go,go,go! Darrell: He lost another tire! The King and Chick are coming up fast! Bob: They're entering turn three! McQueen: Come on. Darrell: I don't belive what I'm watching, Bob! Darrell: Lightning McQueen is hundred feet from his Piston Cup! Bob: The King and Chick rounding turn four. Darrell: Down the stretch they come! And it's, and it's... Bob: It's too close to call! Too close to call! Darrell: I don't belive it! (2X) Mia & Tia: Lightning! Bob: The most spectacular, amazing unequivocally, unbelievable ending in the history of the world! And we don't even know who won! Darrell: Look at that! Security: Hey, no cameras! Get outta here! Kori Turbowitz: We're here in Victory Lane, awaiting the race results. McQueen that was quite a risky move, not taking tires. McQueen crew: Tell me about it. Kori Turbowitz: Are you sorry you don't have a crew chief out there? McQueen's Crew: Hah! McQueen: Oh Kori. There's a lot more to racing than just winning. I mean, taking the race by a full lap... Where's the entertainment in that? No no no... I wanted to give folks a little sizzle. McQueen's crew: Sizzle? McQueen: Am I sorry I don't have a crew chief? No, I'm not. Cause I'm a one-man show. McQueen crew: Whats? Oh, yeah right. Kori Turbowitz: That was a very confident Lightning McQueen. Coming to you live from Victory Lane, I'm Kori Turbowitz. Cameramen: Hey, get out of the shot! McQueen: Yo, Chuck, what are you doing? You're blocking the camera. Everyone wants to see the bolt. McQuenn crew: What? McQueen: Now, back away. McQueen's crew: Ahh! That's it. Come on guys. McQueen: Whoa, team! Where are going? McQueen's crew: We quit, Mr. One-Man Show! McQueen: Oh, OK, leave. Fine. Hahaha. How will I ever find anyone else who knows how to fill me up with gas? Adios Chuck! McQueen's crew: And my name is not Chuck! McQueen: Oh, whatever. Chuck: Hey, Lightning! Yo! McQueen! Seriously, that was some pretty darn nice racin' out there. By me! Hahaha! Chick's crew: Zinger Chick: Welcome to the Chick era, baby! The Piston Cup... It's mine dude. It's mine. Hey fellas, how do you think I'm look in Dinoco blue? Dinoco blue! Hahaha! McQueen: In your dreams Thunder. Chick: Yeah, right. Thunder? What's he talkin' about, "Thunder"? McQueen: You know, cause' thunder always comes after lightning. Pew, Kaka-phow! Chick: Who here knew about the thunder thing? Chick's crew: I didn't. Cameramen: Give us the bolt! Cameramen: That's right. Cameramen: Right in the lens. Cameramen: Show me the bolt, baby! Cameramen: Smile, McQueen! Cameramen: Show me the bolt, McQueen! Cameramen: That's it! Tex: Ohh we, that was one close finish. You sure made Dinoco proud. Thank you, King. The King: Well, Tex, you've been good to me all these years. It's the least I could do. Dear: Whatever happens, you're winner to me, you old daddy rabbit. The King: Thanks, dear. We wouldn't be nothing without you. Mia: I'm Mia. Tia: I'm Tia. Mia & Tia: We're like your biggest fans! Ka-chow! McQueen: I love being me. Security: OK, girls, that's it. Mia & Tia: We love you, Lightning! Some guys far away: We love you more!! The King: Hey, buddy. You're one gutsy racer. McQueen: Oh, hey, Mr. The King. The King: You got more talent in one lug nut than a lot of cars has got in their whole body. McQueen: Really? Oh, that... The King: But you're stupid. McQueen: Excuse me? The King: This ain't a one-man deal, kid. You need to wise-up and get you self a good crew chief and a good team. And you ain't gonna win unless you got good folks behind you, and you let them do their job, like they should. Like I tell the boys at the shop... McQueen: A good team. Yeahhh. Dreaming Song. Mia & Tia: Oh, McQueen. The King: If you figure that out, you just gonna be OK. McQueen: Oh, yeah, that.. That is spectacular advice. Thank you Mr. The King. Speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in Piston Cup history... McQueen: A rookie has won the Piston Cup. Yes!! Speaker: We have a three-way tie. Chick: Oh, ho. Hey, McQueen, that must be really embarrassing. But I wouldn't be worry about it. Because I didn't do it! Hahaha! Speaker: Piston Cup officials have determined that a tiebreaker race between the three leaders will be held in California in one week. Chick: Well, thank you! Thanks to all of you out there! Thank you! Hey, rook, first one to California gets Dinoco all to himself. Ahh! No, not me! No, you rock, and you know that! Balloon: Oh, yeah! Woaah!! McQueen: First one to California gets Dinoco all to himself. Ohh, we'll see who gets there first, Chick. Huh? Mack: Hey, kid! Congrats on the tie. McQueen: I don't want to talk about it. Come on, let's go, Mack. Saddle up. What'd you do with my trailer? Mack: I parked it at your sponsor's tent. McQueen: What? Mack: You gotta make your personal appearance. McQueen: No. No! No,no,no,no! McQueen: Yes, yes, yes! Lightning McQueen here. And I use Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment, new rear end formula! Nothing soothes rusty bumper like Rust-eze. McQueen: Wow! Look at that shine! Use Rust-eze and you too can look like me! Ka-chow! Rust-eze Car: Hahaha. I met this car from Swampscott. He was so rusty he didn't even cast a shadow. Rust-eze Van: You could see his dirty undercarriage. Hahaha. McQueen: Uahh! I hate rusty cars. This is not good for my image. Mack: They did give you your big break. Besides, it's in your contract. McQueen: Oh, will you stop please? Just go get hooked up. Rust-eze Van: Winter is a grand old time. Rust-eze Car: Of this there are no ifs or buts. Rust-eze Van: But remember, all that salt and grime... Rust-eze Car: Can rust your bolts and freeze your... Rust-eze Van: Hey look! There he is! Our almost champ! Victory ran to your rear end in here, kid. Fan: Lightning McQueen, you are wicked fast! Fan: That race was a pisser! Fan: You were booking McQueen! McQueen: Give me a little room guys. Fred: You're my hero Mr.McQueen. McQueen: Yes, I know. Fred, Fred, thank you. Fred: He knows my name. He knows my name! Rust-eze Van: Looking good, Freddie! Rust-eze Car: Thanks to you Lightning, we had a banner year! Rust-eze Van: We might clear enough to buy you some headlights. Rust-eze Car: Are you saying he doesn't have headlights? Rust-eze Van: That's what I'm telling ya. It's just stickers! McQueen: Well, you know, racecars don't need headlights, because the track is always lit. Rust-eze Car: Yeah, well,so is my brother, but he still needs headlights. Hahaha McQueen: Hahaha! Ha!! Hahaha!! Rust-eze Car: Ladies and gentlemen, Lightning McQueen! Fans: Free Bird! McQueen: You know, the Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment team ran a great race today. And remember, with a little Rust-eze...And an insane amount of luck, you too can look like me. Ka-chow. Rust-eze Car: Hey, kid. Rust-eze Van: We love ya. And we're looking forward to another great year. Just like this year. Hahaha. McQueen: Not on your life. Rust-eze Car: Don't drive like my brother! Rust-eze Van: Oh Yeah, don't drive like my brother! Mack: California, here we come! McQueen: Dinoco, here we come! Song McQueen: I needed this. Hello? Harv: Is this Lightning McQueen, the world's fastest racing machine? McQueen: Is this Harv, the world's greatest agent? Harv: And it is such a honor to be your agent and it almost hurts to take ten percent of your winnings and merchandising. And ancillary rights in perpetuity. Anyway, what a race! Hot champ! I didn't see it, but I heard you were great. McQueen: Thanks, Harv. Harv: Listen, they're giving you 20 tickets for the tiebreaker thing in Cali. I'll pass 'em on to your friends. You shoot me the names. You let Harv rock it for you. All right, baby? McQueen: Right. Friends. Yes, there's a... Harv: OK, I get it, Mr.Popular. So many friends you can't even narrow it down. Hey, when you get to town, you better make time for your best friend! You gotta break bread with your mishpoacheh here! McQueen: Yeah, yeah, that'd be great! We should totally... Harv: Ok, I gotta jump, kid. Let me know how it goes. I'm out. McQueen: What? A minivan? Oh, come on Mack, you're in the slow lane. This is Lightning McQueen you're hauling here. Mack: Just stopping off for a quick breather, kid. Old Mack needs a rest. McQueen: Absolutely not. McQueen: We're driving straight to all night till we get to California. We agreed to it. Mack: All night? May I remind you, federal DOT regs state... McQueen: Come on, I need to get there before Chick get hang with Dinoco. Mack: Ahh, all those sleeping trucks. Hey kid, I don't know if I can make it. McQueen: Oh, sure you can, Mack. Look, it'll be easy. I'll stay up with you. Mack: All night? McQueen: All night long. McQueen: Zzzzz... DJ Song Snot Rod: Ah, ahh, achowww! Wingo: Hahaha! Boost: Hey, yo, DJ. DJ: What up? Boost: We got ourselves a nodder. DJ: Hahaha. Mack: Pretty music. Boost: Yo, Wingo! Lane change, man. Wingo: Right back at ya! Hahaha. Snot Rod: Yeah! Boost: Oops! I missed. Snot Rod: You going on vacation? Tuner team: Hahaha. Boost: Oh, no, Snot Rod... Wingo: He's gonna blow! Snot Rod: Ahh...ahhh...ahhh...achoowww!!! Mack: Gesundheit! Hoho. One should never drive while drowsy. McQueen: MACK! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Hey,Mack! Mack! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack,wait for me! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack! Mack! McQueen: Mack! Mack... McQueen:...wait up! Mack. McQueen: Mack! Mack! McQueen: What?You're not Mack. Peterbilt: Mack?I ain't no Mack!I'm a Peterbilt, for dang sake! Peterbilt: Turn on your lights, you moron! McQueen: Mack... The Interstate! Sheriff: Ahh!. Not in my town, you don't. McQueen: Oh, no...Oh, maybe he can help me! He's shooting at me! Why is he shooting at me! Sheriff: I haven't gone this fast in years. I'm gonna blow a gasket or somethin'. McQueen: Serpentine! Serpentine, serpentine! Sheriff: What in the blue blazes? Crazy hot rodder. Filmore: I'm telling you, man, every third blink is slower. Sarge: The sixties weren't good for you, were they? McQueen: What? That's not the Interstate! Ahh ho, Auw, auw,auw! Ahhhh! No, no, no, no! Filmore: I'm not the only seeing this, right? Sarge: Incoming! Filmore: Whoa man. Sarge: No! Ramone: Hey, you scratch my paint! McQueen: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Luigi: My tires! McQueen: Phoah! Red: Huh! McQueen: Uargh! Red: Huh! Filmore: Fly away, Stanley. Be free! Sheriff: Boy, you're in a heap of trouble. Kori Turbowitz: We're live at the Los Angeles International Speedway as the first competitor, Lightning McQueen, is arriving at the track. Cameramen: Is it true he's gonna pose for Cargirl? Cameramen: Lightning, what's your strategy? Woahh! Mack: What? Did I forget to wipe my mud flaps? News: McQueen's driver arrived in California, but McQueen was missing. News: Racecar Lightning McQueen was reported missing. News: He scheduled to race an unprecedented... News: Sponsor stated they have no idea where he is. Junior: I hope Lightning's OK. I sure hate to see anything bad happen to him. Jay Limo: I don't know what's harder to find, Lightning McQueen or a crew chief who'll work for him! Hummer: Lightning McQueen must be found at all costs! News: They're all asking the same question: Where is McQueen? McQueen: Oh, boy. Where am I? Mater: Mornin', sleepin' beauty! McQueen: Ahhhhh!! Mater: Hahaha! Boy, I was wonderin' when you was gonna wake up. McQueen: Take whatever you want! Just don't hurt me! a parking boot? Why do I have a parking boot on? What's going on here? Please! Mater: You're funny. I like you already. My name's Mater. McQueen: Mater. Mater: Yeah, like "tuh-mater", but without the "tuh". What's your name? McQueen: You don't know my name? Mater: Uhh, no, I know your name. Is your name Mater too? McQueen: What? Look, I need to get to California as fast as possible. Where am I? Mater: Where are you? Shoot! You're in Radiator Springs. The cutest little town in Carburetor County. McQueen: Oh, great. Just great! Mater: Well, if you think that's great, you should see the rest of the town. McQueen: You know, I'd love to see the rest of the town! So if you could just open the gate, take this boot off, you and me, we go cruisin', check out the local scene... Mater: Dad-gum! McQueen: How'd that be, Tuh-Mater? Mater: Cool Sheriff: Mater! What did I tell you about talkin' to the accused? Mater: To not to. Sheriff: Well, quit yer yappin' and tow this delinquent road hazard to traffic court. Mater: Well, we'll talk later, Mater. Haha. "Later, Mater." That's funny! Sheriff: The Radiator Springs Traffic Court will come to order! Ramone: Hey, you scratched my paint! I ought take a blowtorch to you, man! Luigi: You broke-a the road! You a very bad car! Fillmore: Fascist! Commie! McQueen: Officer, talk to me, babe. How long is this gonna take? I gotta get to California, pronto. Sheriff: Where's your lawyer? McQueen: Tuh, I don't know. Tahiti maybe. He's got a timeshare there. Sheriff: When a defendant has no lawyer, the court will assign one to him. Hey! Anyone want to be his lawyer? Mater: Shoot, I'll do it, Sheriff! Sheriff: All rise! The Honorable Doc Hudson presiding. Luigi: Show-off. Sheriff: May Doc have mercy on your soul. Doc Hudson: All right, I wanna know who's responsible for wreckin' my town, Sheriff. I wanna his hood on a platter! I'm gonna put him in jail till he rots! No, check that. I'm gonna put him in jail till the jail rots on top of him, and then I'm gonna move him to a new jail and let that jail rot. I'm... Throw him out of here, Sheriff. I want him out of my courtroom. I want him out of our town! Case dismissed. McQueen: Yes! Mater: Boy, I'm purty good at this lawyerin' stuff. Sally: Sorry I'm late, Your Honor! McQueen: Holy Porsche! She's gotta be from my attorney's office. Hey, thanks for comin', we're all set. He's letting me go. Sally: He's letting you go? McQueen: Yeah, your job's pretty easy today. All you have to do now is stand there and let me look at you. Listen, I'm gonna cut to the chase. Me, you, dinner. Ka-chow! Sally: What the...? Auww! Please! McQueen: I know, I get that reaction a lot. I create feelings in others that they themselves don't understand. Sally: Ohhh, auww! McQueen: Oh, I'm sorry. Did I scare you? Mater: Well, a little bit, but I'll be alright. Sally: OK. I'm gonna go talk to the judge. McQueen: Do what you gotta do, baby. Oh, but listen. Be careful. Folks around here are not firing on all cylinders, if you know what I mean. Mater: Ka-ching! Auww! Sally: I'll keep that in mind. Hey there, Mater. Mater: Howdy, Sally. Sally: Hi, folks! Folks: Good morning! Sally. McQueen: You know her? Mater: She's the town attorney and my fiancee. McQueen: What? Mater: Nah, I'm just kiddin'. She just like me for my body. Sally: Doc, you look great this morning. Did you do something different with your side view mirrors? Doc: What do you want, Sally? Sally: Ah, come on, make this guy fix the road. The town needs this. Doc: No. I know his type. Racecar. That's the last thing this town needs. Sally: OK, I didn't want to have to do this, Doc, but you leave me no choice. Fellow citizens, you're all aware of our town's proud history. Doc: Here she goes again. Sally: Radiator Springs, the glorious jewel strung on the necklage of Route 66, the mother road! It is our job and our pleasure to take care of the travelers on our stretch of that road. Sarge: Travelers? What travelers? Filmore: Ignore him. Sally: But how, I ask you, are we to care for those travelers if there is no road for them to drive on? Luigi, what do you have at your store? Luigi: Tires Sally: And if no one can get to you? Luigi: I won't sell any...tires. I will lose everything! Ohho. Sally: Flo, what do you have at your store? Flo: I have gas. Lotsa gas! Sally: OK boys, stay with me. And, and, Flo, what'll happen if no one can come to your station to buy gas? Flo: I'll go outta business and... we'll have to leave town. Sally: And what's gonna happen to all of us if Flo leaves town and closes her station? Folks: Without gas, we're done for! Lizzie: What? Sally: So, don't you think the car responsible should fix our road? Lizzie: The only guy strong enough to fix that road is Big Al! Ramone: Lizzie, the guy left, like, 15 years ago. Lizzie: Then why are you bringing him up, you lemon? Sally: Oh, he can do it. He's got the horsepower. So, what do you want him to do? Folks: Fix the road! Sally: Because we are a town worth fixing! Folks: Yeah!!! Doc: Order in the court! Seems like my mind has been changed for me. Folks: Yeah!! McQueen: No! Filmore: Nice rulin'. McQueen: Ohh, I am so not take you to dinner. Sally: That's OK, Stickers. You can take Bessie. Mater: Oh man, you got to work with Bessie! I'd give my left two lug nuts for somethin' like that. McQueen: Bessie? Who's Bessie? Doc: This here is Bessie, finest road-pavin' machine ever built. I'm hereby sentencing you to community service. You're gonna fix the road under my supervision. McQueen: What? This place is crazy! Mater: Hey, I know this may be a bad time right now, but tha, you owe me $32,000 in legal fees. McQueen: What? Doc: So we're gonna hitch you up to sweet Bessie, and you're gonna pull her nice. McQueen: You're gotta be kidding me. Doc: You start there where the road begins, you finish down there where the road ends. Mater: Holy shoot! McQueen: Whoa, whoa, whoa! How long is this gonna take? Doc: Well, fella does it right, should take him about five days. McQueen: Five days? But I should be in California schmoozing Dinoco right now! Doc: Then if I were you, I'd quit yappin and start workin'! Hook him up, Mater. Mater: Okay-dokey. McQueen: Freedom!! Mater: Maybe I should've-a hooked him up to Bessie...and then-a...then took the boot off. McQueen: Wuuuhuuu! Goodbye, Radiator Springs, and goodbye, Bessie! California, here I come! Yeah! Oh, fell that wind. Yes! No,no,no,no! Outta gas? How can I be outta gas? Sheriff: Hahaha. Boy, we ain't as dumb as you think we are. McQueen: But,but,but how did, how did...you...? Sally: We siphoned your gas while you were passed out. Ka-chow. McQueen: Auw,auw,auw,auw,auwww!! Sheriff: Hahaha. Sheriff: Gentlemen. Sarge: Sheriff. Filmore: Hai, Sheriff. Luigi: Why the tires are here? Guido: Sono sempre stati qui. Luigi: They were better well before. Guido: Stai sempre a parlare. Luigi: Guido! Lizzie: Red, can you move over? I want to get look at that sexy hot rod. Mater: You know, I used to be a purty good whistler. I can't do it now of course, on account of sometimes I get fluid built up in my engine block, but Doc said he's gonna fix it dough. He can fix about anything. That's why we made him the judge. Boy, you shoulda heard me on Giddy-up, Oom Papa Mow Mow. Now, I'm not one to brag, but people come purty far to see me get low on the "Mow-Mow". McQueen: Ah? Ah, man, that's just great! Mater: Hey, what's wrong? McQueen: My lucky sticker's all dirty. Mater: Thaah, that ain't nothin'. I'll clean it for ya. McQueen: No,no,no! That wouldn't be necessary. Hey! Hey, big fella! Yeah, you in the red! I could use a little hose down. Help me wash this off. What, where's he goin'? Mater: Oh, he's still a little bit shy, and he hates you for killin' his flowers. McQueen: I shouldn't have to put up with this. I'm a precision instrument of speed and aerodynamics. Mater: You hurt your what? McQueen: I'm a very famous racecar! Luigi: You are a famous racecar? A real racecar? McQueen: Yes, I'm a real racecar. What do you think? Look at me. Luigi: I have followed racing my entire life of my whole life! McQueen: Then you know who I am. I'm Lightning McQueen. Luigi: Lightening McQueen! McQueen: Yes! Yes! Luigi: I must scream it to the world! My excitement from the top of someplace very high! Do you know many Ferraris? McQueen: No,no,no. They race on the European circuit. I'm in the Piston Cup! What? Luigi: Luigi follow only the Ferraris. Flo: Is that what I think it is? Sally: Customers. Customers! Customers, everyone! Customers! OK. Lizzie: Customers? Sally: All right, everybody calm down for a long time. Just remember what we rehearsed. Make sure your "Open, please come in" signs are out. And you all know what to do. All right, nobody panics. Here we go! Minny: Van, I just don't see any on-ramp anywhere. Van: Minny, I know exactly where we are. Minny: Yeah, we're in the middle of nowhere. Van: Honey, please. Sally: Hello. Welcome to Radiator Springs, gateway to Ornament Valley. Legendary for it's quality service and friendly hospitality. How can we help you? Van: We don't need anything, thank you very much. Minny: Whoa, honey ask her direction to the Interstate. Van: There's no need to ask for directions. Minny, I know exactly where we're going. Minny: He did the same thing on our trip to Shakopee. You know, we were headed over there for the Crazy Days, and we... Van: OK,OK. Really. We're just peachy, OK? Filmore: What you really need is the sweet taste of my homemade, organic fuel. Van: No, it doesn't agree with my tank. Minny: We're just trying to find the Interstate. Sarge: Good to see you, Soldier! Come on by Sarge's Surplus Hut for all your government surplus needs. Minny: Ohh, honey, surplus! Van: I think we have too much surplus. Sally: I do have a map over the Cozy Cone Motel. And if you do stay, we offer a free Lincoln Continental breakfast. Minny: Honey, she's got a map. Van: I don't need a map! I have the GPS. Never need a map again, thank you. Flo: How 'bout somethin' to drink? Stop at Flo's V8 Cafe. Finest fuel on Route 66. Van: No, we just top off. Luigi: And if you need tires, stop by Luigi's Casa Della Tires, home of the Leaning Tower of Tires. Minny: We're just trying to find the Interstate. Ramone: But you do need a paint job man. Ramone will paint you up right. Hey, anything you want! You know, like a flame job. Minny: No, thanks... Ramone: Maybe ghost flames! You like old school pinstripin'? Von Dutch style ha? Minny: Oh, honey, look. Von Dutch. Van: Oh, ho, OK, no. Ahahaha. We're gonna be going now, OK? Auww! Lizzie: A little somethin' to remember us by, OK? Van: Oh,ha,ha. OK! Sally: Come back soon, OK? I mean, you know where we are! Tell your friends! Van: HohohOK! Yes. You bet. Minny: Thanks again, folks. Bye-bye now. McQueen: Psst! Psst! Hey! Hey, hey,hey! I know how to get to the Interstate! Minny: Oh, do ya? Van: Minny, no. McQueen: Yeah, yeah,yeah. No, not really. But listen. I'm Lightning McQueen, the famous racecar. I'm being held heren against my will. And I need you to call my team, so they can rescue me, and get me to California in time for me to win The Piston Cup. Do you understand? McQueen: No,no,no,no,no. No, It's the truth! I'm telling you! You gotta help me! Don't leave me here! I'm in hillbilly hell! My IQ's dropping by the second! I'm becoming one of them! Sally: OK, don't worry. They know where we are now. They're gonna tell their friends. You'll see. Radio: And we'll be back for our Hank Williams marathon... Sally: That's good. Radio:...after a Piston Cup update. Still no sign of Lightning McQueen. Meanwhile, Chick Hicks arrived in California and today became the first car to spend practice time on the track. Chick: Yeah, well it's just nice to get out here before the other competitors. You know, get a headstart. Gives me an edge. Dreaming Song Chick: Yeah. Chick: Hey, McQueen... Eat your heart out. McQueen: Mater, let me get this straight. I can go when this road is done. That's the deal, right? Mater: That's what they done did said. McQueen: OK. Outta my way. I got a road to finish. Mater: He's done! Doc: Done? Mater: Ahmhm. Doc: It's only been an hour. McQueen: I'm done. Look, I'm finished. Just say thank you, and I'll be on my way. That's all I gotta say. Mater: Weehoo! I'm the first one on the new road! Ahho! It rides purty smooth. Sally: It looks awful! McQueen: Well, it matches the rest of the town. Sally: Ahh. Red: Umph, huhuhuh. Sally: Red. Who do you think you are? McQueen: Look, Doc said when I finish, I could go. That was the deal. Doc: The deal was you fix the road, not making it worse. Now, scrape it off! Start over again. McQueen: Hey, look, grandpa, I'm not a bulldozer. I'm a racecar. Doc: Hohoho. Is that right? Then why don't we just have a little race? Me and you. Sally: What? McQueen: Hohoho. Me and you. Is that a joke? Doc: If you win, you go and I fix the road. If I win, you do the road my way. Sheriff: Doc, what're you doin'? McQueen: Hahaha. I don't mean to be rude here Doc, but you probably go zero to sixty in like what? Three-point-five years? Doc: Then I reckon you ain't got nothin' to worry about. McQueen: You know what old timer? That's a wonderful idea. Let's race. Sheriff: Gentlemen, this will be a one-lap race. You will drive to Willy's Butte, go around Willy's Butte and come back. There will be no bumpin', no cheatin', no spittin', no bittin', no road rage, no maimin', no oil slickin', no pushin', no shovin', no backstabbin', no road-hoggin' and no lollygaggin'. McQueen: Speed. I'm speed. Float like a Cadillac, sting like a Beemer. Luigi: OhHohohoo. My friend Guido, he dream to give a real racecar a pit stop. Guido: Pit stop. McQueen: Aa, haha. The race is only one lap, guys. Uno lappo! Don't need any help. I work solo mio. Luigi: Fine. Race your way. McQueen: No pit stoppo. Comprendo? Guido: OK. Sheriff: Gentlemen. Start your engines! Ramone: Hijole! Check that out! Filmore: Whoa. Flo: Emm, emm. Sally: Great idea, Doc. Now the road will never get done. Sheriff: Luigi. Luigi: Hohoho. On your mark, get set. Uno for the money, due for the show, tre to get ready, and quattro to... I can't belive it. Go!! Hahaha. Doc: Yehaa! Hahaha! Sally: Yeah. Luigi: Huh? Doc, the flag means go. Remember the flag. Here we go. Go. Ramone: Uhh, Doc, what are you doing, man? Doc: Oh, dear. It would seem I'm off to a poor start. Well, better late than never. Come on, Mater. Might need a little help. Mater: Ahh, OK. Doc: You got your tow cable? Mater: Well, yeah. I always got my tow cable. Why? Doc: Ohh, just in case. McQueen: Ahh,auw,auw,auw,no,no,no,no,no! Ramone: Oh, man! Auww!! Filmore: Whoa. Bad trip, man. Doc: Hey! Was that floatin' like a Cadillac, or was that stingin' like a Beemer? I'm confused. Mater: Eh,eh,eh. Doc: You drive like you fix roads. Lousy! Have fun fishin', Mater McQueen: Ahhh! Mater: I'm startin' to think he knowed you was gonna crash! McQueen: Thank you, Mater. Thank you. McQueen: I can make a little turn on dirt. You think? No. And now I'm a day behind. I'm never gonna get outta here! Ramone: Hey, ese! You need a new paint job, man! McQueen: No, thank you. Filmore: How 'bout some organic fuel? Sarge: That freak juice? McQueen: Pass. Flo: Whooh, watchin' him workin' is makin' me thirsty. Anybody else want somethin' to drink? Mater: Nah, not me, Flo. I'm on one of them there special diets. I'm a precisional instrument of speed and aero-matics. McQueen: "You race like you fix roads." I'll show him. I will show him! McQueen: Great! I hate it! Hate, hate, hate, hate it!! Doc: Haha. Music. Sweet music. Sally: Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. McQueen: Radiator Springs, a happy place. Bessie: Peckkk. McQueen: Whoa, OK, Bessie you think that funny? Great! I'm talking to Bessie now! I'm talkin to Bessie!! Mater: Hahaha. Sally: Wow. Mater: Mornin', Sally! Hey, look at this here fancy new road that Lightnin' McQueen done just made! Sally: Yes! Amazing! Ramone: Yeah! Flo: Ohh, Ramone, Mama ain't seen you that low in years. Ramone: I haven't seen a road like this in years. Flo: Well, then let's cruise, baby. Ramone: Low and slow. Luigi: E Bellissima! It's beautiful! Guido, look, it's a like it was paved by angels. Ohhh. Mater: Oh, I tell you what. I bet even the roads on the moon ain't this smooth. Sally: Doc, look at this. Shoulda tossed him into the cactus a lot sooner, huh? Doc: Well, he ain't finished yet. Still got a long way to go. Luigi: Guido, look at Luigi! Hahaha. This is fantastico! Sally: That looks like fun! Mater, I got dibs, next turn! Lizzie: Hey, Luigi, this new road makes your place look like a dump. Luigi: Ahhh, that crazy old devil woman. Ohh, ohh. She's right! Sally: Ohh, ahh! Luigi: Guido! Doc: That punk actually did a good jab. Well, now... where the hack is he? Doc: Sheriff! Is he makin' another run for it? Sheriff: No,no. He ran outta asphalt in the middle of the night, asked me if he could come down here. All he's tryin' to do is make that there turn. McQueen: No,no,no,no! Ohh, great. Perfect turns on every track I've ever raced on. Doc: Sheriff, why don't you go get yourself a quart of oil at Flo's. Doc: I'll keep an eye on him. Sheriff: Well, thanks, Doc. I've been feelin' a quart low. McQueen: Ahhhhh! Phuahh, thahh! Doc: This ain't asphalt, son. This is dirt. McQueen: Oh, great. What do you want? You hear to gloat? Doc: You don't have three-wheel brakes, so you got to pitch it hard, break it loose and then just drive it with the throttle. Give it too much, you'll be outta the dirt and into the tulips. McQueen: So you're a judge, a doctor and a racing expert. Doc: I'll put it simple. If you goin' hard enough left, you'll find yourself turnin' right. McQueen: Ooo, right. That makes perfect sense. Turn right to go left. Yes! Thank you! Or should I say,"No thank you"? Because in Opposite World, maybe that really means, "Thank you"! Tuh, crazy grandpa car. What an idiot! Doc: Ahhh. McQueen: Turn right to go left. Oh. Whoa, auwwww. Oh, that... AUUUUUWWWWWW!!! McQueen: Turn right to go left. Guess what. I tried it. You know what? This crazy thing happened... I went right! Lizzie: You keep talkin' to yourself, people'll think you crazy. McQueen: Thanks for the tip. Lizzie: What? I wasn't talkin' to you. Sally: Oh, Guido, e bellissimo! Guido: Che cosa? Sally: It looks great! This is great! Guido: Ti piace, eh? Si, si, bellissimo. Mater: Ummmph. Oh, lord. Hehehe. Sheriff: Mater! I need you to watch the prisoner tonight. Mater: Well, dad-gum! Wait a minute, what if he tries to run again? Sheriff: Just let him run outta gas and tow him on back. But keep an eye on him. Mater: Yes, sir! McQueen: While I'm stuck here paving this stinkin' road, Chick's in California schmoozing Dinoco. My Dinoco. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Who's touching me? Luigi: You have a slow leak. Guido, he fix. You make a such a nice new road. You come to my shop. Luigi take a good care of you. Eventhough you not a Ferrari. You buy four tires, I give you a full size spare absolutely free! McQueen: Look, I get all my tires for free. Luigi: Hohoho.. I like your style, eh? You drive the hard bargain. OK. Luigi make you a new deal. You buy one tire, I give you three for free! Flo: Aaa... Would you look at that? Ramone, Ramone! Ramone: Hm,hm,hm. Luigi: Then Luigi make you a new deal McQueen: No,no,no,no. Deal me out. Pass. No, thank you. Luigi: No,no,no,no,no. This is it. My last offer. You buy one tire, I give you seven-a snow tire for all free! Done. You interested, you call me. You know where I am. McQueen: Fuuuhhh. Ahhhh. Stop! Let me...Tuhh, puahh!! sally: Oh, Red, you missed a spot. See it right there? On the hood right there. McQueen: No, no! Noooo!! Stop, stop! That cold!! Help! Please! Stop! Sally: Thanks, Red. McQueen: What was that for? Sally: Do you want to stay at the Cozy Cone or what? McQueen: Huh? Sally: And if you do, you gotta be clean. 'Cause even here in hillibilly hell we have standards. McQueen: What,I...? I don't get it. Sally: Nothing I just thought I'd say thank you for doin' a great job. So I thought I'd let you stay with me. I mean, not with me! But there. Not with me there, but there in your own Cozy Cone. And I'd be in my cone, and it's... McQueen: Wait. Wait, you're being nice to me. Sally: I mean if you want to stay at the dirty impound, thats, thats fine. You know, I understand you criminal types. McQueen: No,no,no,no. That's OK. Yeah, the Cozy Cone. Sally: Ehhh. It's newly refurbished McQueen: Haha. Yeah, it's like a clever little twist the motel's made out of caution cones, which, of course, cars usually try to avoid, now we're gonna stay in them. Haha. That's funny. Sally: Figure that all out on your own, did you? Cone number one, if you want. McQueen: Auuhhh. McQueen: Hey, do I spy a little pinstriping tattoo back there? Sally: Auuww. Haha. That's just a... Ahhahaha. Auuww. You saw that? Yeah! Just gonna be going. Gonna...Yeah. Mater: You know, I once knew this girl Doreen. Good-lookin' girl. Looked just like a Jaguar, only she was a truck! You know, I used to crash into her, just so I could spoke to her. McQueen: What are you talking about? Mater: I don't know. Hey, I know somethin' we can do tonight, 'cause I'm in charge of watchin' you! McQueen: No, Mater, I gotta finish this road, and I have to get out of here. Mater: Well, that's all right, Mr. I Can't Turn On Dirt. You probably couldn't handle it anyway. McQueen: Whoa, whoa, easy now, Mater. You know who you're talkin' to? This is Lightning McQueen. I can handle anything. McQueen: Mater, I'm not doin' this. Mater: Oh, come on, you'll love it. Hehehe. Tractor-tippin's fun. McQueen: This is ridiculous. Mater: All right, listen. When I say go, we go. But don't let Frank catch ya. Go! McQueen: Whoa! Wait! Who, who's Frank? Mater. Wait, Mater! Mater: OK, here's what you do. You just sneak up in front of 'em, and then honk. And they do the rest. Watch this. Mater: Hahahaha. I swear, tractors is so dumb! I tell you what, buddy, you don't get much better than this. McQueen: Yep, you're livin' the dream, Mater boy. Mater: I don't care who you are, that's funny right there. Oh, you turn, bud. McQueen: Mater, I can't. I don't even have a horn. Mater: Baby. McQueen: I'm not a baby. Mater: Puuuck, puck, puck. McQueen: Fine. Stop! stop, OK? All right. I'll do something. Mater & McQueen: Hahahahaha!!! Mater: That's Frank. McQueen: Ahhhh!! Mater: Run, hahaha , run!!! Mater: Run! He's gonna get ya! Hahaha!! Sally: Customers! Mater: Tomorrow night we can go look for the ghostlight! McQueen: I can't wait, Mater. Mater: Oh, yeah, I'm tellin' ya! Oh, boy, you gotta admit that was funnn unn! McQueen: Oh, yeah...yeah. Mater: Well, we better get you back to the impound lot. McQueen: You know, actually, Sally's gonna let me stay at the motel. Mater: Aaaa... Gettin' cozy at the Cone, is we? McQueen: Oh, come...No. No, are you kidding? Besides, she can't stand me. And I don't like her, to be honest. Mater: Yeah, you probably right. Hey, look, there's Miss Sally! McQueen: Where, where? Mater: Hahaha. You're in love with Miss Sally. McQueen: No, I'm not. Mater: Yes, you do. McQueen: No way. Mater: Way. McQueen: Come on, look Mater: You're in love with Miss Sally(2X) McQueen: OK, that's real mature Mater, real grown up. Mater: You love her (7X) McQueen: Wait...All right. OK. Mater, Mater, Mater, no. Will you stop that? Mater: Stop what? McQueen: That's driving backwards stuff. It's creeping me out. You're gonna wreck on somethin'. Mater: Wreck? Shoot! I'm the world's best backwards driver! You just watch this right here, lover boy. McQueen: What are you doing? Watch out! Look out! Mater? Mater! Mater! McQueen: Hey take it easy, Mater! Mater: Waaaaaaa! Ha,ha,ha! Hee,hee. McQueen: Hahaha. He's nuts. Mater: No need to watch where I'm goin'. Just need to know where I've been. McQueen: Whoa, that was incredible! How'd you do that? Mater: Rearview mirrors. We'll get you some, and I'll teach you if you want. McQueen: Yeah, maybe I'll use it in my big race. Mater: What's so important about this race of yours, anyway? McQueen: It's not just a race. We're talking about the Piston Cup! I've been dreaming about it my whole life! I'll be the first rookie in history ever to win it. And when I do, we're talkin' big new sponsor, with private helicopters. No more medicated bumper ointment. No more rusty old cars. Mater: What's wrong with rusty old cars? McQueen: Well, I don't mean you, Mater. I mean other old cars. You know? Not like you. I like you. Mater: Nahhh, it's OK, buddy. Hey, you think maybe one day I can get a ride in one of them helicopters? I mean, I've always wanted to ride in one of them fancy helicopters. McQueen: Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, sure. Mater: You mean it? McQueen: Oh, yeah. Anything you say. Mater: I knew it. I knowed I made a good choice! McQueen: In what? Mater: My best friend. Mater: See you tomorrow, buddy! McQueen and Sally parked beneath a tree, K-I-S somethin'-somethin'-somethin'-t!! McQueen: Hahaha! Whoa, whoa. Haha. McQueen: Number one. Number one...Ahhh...Number one! McQueen: Ahh, this is nice. Sally: Hey, Stickers. McQueen & Sally: Huh!! Sally: I'm sorry. McQueen: Wohho!! You scared me. You gotta be careful. Sally: I scared myself scaring you scaring me. McQueen: I mean, I wasn't like "scared" scared. Sally: No, of course not. Not. McQueen: I was more... Sally: Just I overheard you talkin' to Mater. McQueen: When? Just, just now? What, what did, what did you hear? Sally: Oh, just something about a helicopter ride. McQueen: Oh, yeah. Yeah, he got a kick out of that, didn't he? Sally: Did you mean it? McQueen: What? Sally: That you'll get him a ride. McQueen: Oh, who knows? I mean first things first. I gotta get outta here and make the race. Sally: Ah, hah. You know...Mater trusts you. McQueen: Yeah, OK. Sally: Did you mean that? McQueen: What? Sally: Was it just a "Yeah, OK", or "Yeah...OK" or"Yea-yeah, OK" McQueen: Look, I'm exhausted. It's kinda been a long day. Sally: Yeah, OK. G'night. McQueen: Oh ah. Hey, thank you. Sally: What did you just say? McQueen: You know, thanks for lettin' me stay here. It's nice to be out of the impund, and this is... It's great. Newly refurbished, right? Sally: Yeah. McQueen: Good night. Sally: Good night. Sally: Huhh. Sarge: Will you turn that disrespectful junk off? Filmore: Respect the classics, man. It's Hendrix! McQueen: Ahh...huh...please...huh... Dreaming Song McQueen: No!! Frank: Uarghhh!! McQueen: Noooo!!! I gotta get outta here! McQueen: Hey, have you seen the Sheriff? Oh! Oh, my gosh. Oh! Doc: Hey, what are you doin'? Sheriff: Get a good peak, city boy? McQueen: I,a..a..I just need my daily gas ration from the Sheriff. Doc: Wait for him at Flo's. Now get outta here. McQueen: I've been trying to get outta here for three days! Sheriff: Hope you enjoyed the show! McQueen: Whoaho, Doc. Time to clean out the garage, buddy, come on. McQueen: What? He has a Piston Cup? McQueen: Oh, my gosh. Three Piston Cup? Doc: Sign says stay out. McQueen: You, you have three Piston Cups. How could you have... Doc: I knew you couldn't drive. I didn't know you couldn't read. McQueen: You're the Hudson Hornet! Doc: Wait over at Flo's, like I told ya! McQueen: Of course. I can't belive I didn't see it before. You're The Fabulous Hudson Hornet! You still to hold the record for most wins in single season. Oh, we gotta talk. You gotta show me your tricks. Please. Doc: I already tried that. McQueen: And you won the championship three times! Look at those trophies! Doc: You look. All I see is a bunch of empty cups. Filmore: You know, some automotive yoga could really lower your RPM's, man. Sarge: Oh, take a car wash, hippie. Flo: Yeah, look at my husband, y'all. Hooo...That's your color! Ramone: Yellow, baby. Hahaha. Flo: Mmm! You smokin' hot! Sheriff: There he is! McQueen: Oh, my gosh! Did you know Doc is a famous racecar? Folks: Hahahaha! Sheriff: Doc? Our Doc? Sarge: Not Doc Hudson. McQueen: No,no,no,no, it's true! He's a real racing legend. He's The Fabulous Hudson Hornet! Flo: Fabulous? I never seen Doc drive more than 20 miles an hour. I mean, have you ever seen him race? McQueen: No, but I wish I could have of. They say he was amazing! He wins three Piston Cups. Mater: Phooah!! He did what in his cup? Sheriff: I think the heat's startin' to get to the boy! Lizzie: Well, I'll say! Look how red he is! Ramone: Yeah, I think he needs a new coat of poly, man. Mater: Are you sick, buddy? Sheriff: You are lookin' a little peaked. Ramone: Yeah, he needs a new coat of poly for sure! Sheriff: Hey, hey! What are you doin'? Sally: It's OK, Sheriff. You can trust me, right? Sheriff: I trust you, all right. It's him I'm worried about. Sally: Mmm... I trust him. Come on, let's take a drive. McQueen: A drive? Sally: Yeah, a drive. Don't you big city racecars ever just take a drive? McQueen: Ahhh...No. No, we don't. Sally: Hey, Stickers! Do you comin' or what? Flo: Ahmm. And you thought he was gonna run. Ramone: Hey, can you believe it, man? He actually thought Doc was a famous racecar! Hahaha... That's so too much!! McQueen: OK, you got me out here. Where are we goin'? Sally: I don't know. McQueen: Whoa! Yes. Sally: Hahaha. McQueen: Whoa! Hahaha. Uahh!! Sally: Hahaha. McQueen: Thahhh! Sally: Ah.. hahaha! Sally: Ah.. hahaha! McQueen: Hahaha! Thuhhh!!Thuhh!! McQueen: Wow! What is this place? Sally: Wheel Well. Used to be the most popular stop on the mother road. McQueen: This place? Sally: Yeah, imagine...Oh, imagine what it must have been like to stay here. McQueen: You know, I don't get you. How does a Porsche wind up in a place like this? Sally: Well, it's really pretty simple. I was...an attorney in LA livin' life in the fast lane, and. McQueen: Oh, you were, were you? Were you rich? Sally: What? McQueen: Just...clues to the puzzle. Sally: Yeah, OK. Well, that was my life. And you know what? It never felt...happy. McQueen: Yeah. I mean...really? Sally: Yeah. So I left California. Just drove and drove and finally broke down right here. Doc fixed me up, Flo took me in. Well, they all did. And I never left. McQueen: Yeah. You know, I understand. You need a little R & R. Recharge and old batteries. But you know, after a while, why didn't you go back? Sally: I fell in love. McQueen: Ohh. Sally: Yep. McQueen: Corvette? Sally: No. Sally: I fell in love with this. McQueen: Whoa. Look at that. Look, they're drivin' right by. They don't even know what they're missing! Sally: Well, it didn't used to be that way. McQueen: Oh, yeah? Sally: Yeah. Forty years ago, that Interstate down there didn't exist. McQueen: Really? sally: Yeah. Back then, cars came across the country a whole different way. McQueen: How do you mean? Sally: Well, the road didn't cut through land like that Interstate. It moved with the land, you know? It rose, it fell, it curved. Folk: Mornin'! Folk: Nice day, huh? Sally: Cars didn't drive on it to make a great time. They drove on it to have a great time. Song McQueen: Well, what happened? Sally: The town got bypassed just to save ten minutes of driving. Song McQueen: How great would it have been to see this place in its heyday! Sally: Ohh...I can't tell you how many times I've dreamed of that. But one of these days, we'll find a way to get it back on the map. McQueen: Yeah. Hey, listen, thanks for the drive. I had a great time. It's kinda nice to slow down every once in a while. Sally: You're welcome. Mater: Hey, listen, listen! If anybody asks you, we was out smashin' mailboxes, OK? McQueen: Wha... What? Ramone: Oh, man, the paint's still wet! Luigi: No,no,no,no! Get out of the store! Hey! Don't eat the radial! Here, take-a the snow tires. Sheriff: Mater! Mater: I wasn't tractor-tippin'! Sheriff: Then where did all these gol-durn tractors come from? Mater: Whoa, boy! Whoa! McQueen: Hahaha. Hey! Hey guys. There's one goin' this way. I got it. McQueen: Come here, little tractor, come here. Yeah, that's a good tractor. No,no,no,no, come here. What are you doing? You're not supposed to go wandering off all...alone. McQueen: What are you doin' with those old racin' tires? Doc: Huuhhh. McQueen: Come on, Doc, drive. Doc: Ahhhh. Yeah. McQueen: Wow! You're amazing! What are you doin'? Doc, wait! Mater: Giddup right in there! Come on, Rusty. Weee...heyy! McQueen: Doc, hold it! Seriously, your driving's incredible! Doc: Wonderful. Now, go away. McQueen: Hey, I mean it. You've still got it! Doc: I'm askin' you to leave. McQueen: Come on. I'm a racecar, you're... a much older racecar, but under the hood you and I are the same. Doc: We are not the same! Understand? Now, get out. McQueen: How could a car like you quit at the top of your game? Doc: You think I quit? McQueen: Right. Your big wreck in '54. Doc: They quit on me. When I finally got put together, I went back expecting a big welcome. You know what they said? "You're history". Moved right on to the next rookie standing in line. There was a lot left in me. I never got chance to show 'em. I keep that, to remind me never to go back. I just never expected that that world would...would find me here. McQueen: Hey, look, Doc, I'm not them. Doc: Oh, yeah? McQueen: No, I'm not. Doc: When is the last time you cared about something except yourself, hot rod? You name me one time. And I will take it all back. Ahhuh? I didn't think so. These are good folk around here, who care about one another. I don't want 'em depending on someone they can't count on. McQueen: Oh, like you? You've been here how long and your friends don't even know who you are? Who's caring about only himself? Doc: Just finish that road and get outta here! sarge: Will you turn that disrespectful junk off? Filmore: Respect the classics, man. Mater: He's done. He must've finished it while we was all sleepin'. Doc: Good riddance. Flo: He's gone? Sarge: Well, we wouldn't want him to miss that race of his. Sheriff: Hisk...hisk. Ramone: Oh, dude, are you crying? Sheriff: No! I'm happy! I don't have to watch him every second of the day anymore! I'm glad he's gone! Red: Hahaha. McQueen: What's wrong with Red? Mater: Oh, he's just sad 'cause you left town, and went to your big race to win the Piston Cup that you've always dreamed about your whole life and get that big ol' sponsor and that fancy helicopter you was talkin' about. Mater: Huuhh! Wait a minute! Folks: Hahaha. Mater: I knowed you wouldn't leave without saying goodbye. McQueen: Hahaha. Sheriff: What are you doin' here, son? You're gonna miss your race. Don't worry. I'll give you a police escort, and we'll make up the time. McQueen: Thank you, Sheriff. But you know I can't go just yet. Sheriff: Well, why not? McQueen: I'm not sure these tires...can get me all the way to California. Yeah, does anybody know what time Luigi's opens? Luigi: Ah..haha! I can't-a believe it! Luigi: Four new tires! Grazien, Mr. Lightning. Grazien! Flo: Would you look at that! Luigi: Our first real customers in years! I am filled with tears of ecstacy, for this is the most glorious day of my life! McQueen: All right, Luigi, give me the best set of blackwalls you've got. Luigi: No,no,no,no! You don't-a know what you want. Luigi know what you want. Blackwall tires. They blend into the pavement. But-a this...white-wall tires! They say, "Look at me! Here I am! Love me." McQueen: All right, you're the expert. Luigi: Eh, hehehee! McQueen: Oh, and don't forget the spare. Luigi: Perfetto. Guido! Guido: Peet stop! Song Luigi: Hahaha! What did Luigi tell you, aey? McQueen: Wow, you were right. Better than a Ferrari, huh? Luigi: Aaa, No. McQueen: Wow! This organic fuel is great! Why haven't I heard about it before? Filmore: It's a conspiracy, man! The oil companies got a grip on the government! They're feedin' us a bunch of lies, man. McQueen: OK, I'll take a case. Ramone: Ahh.. Yeah. Ka-chow. Mater: Here she comes! McQueen: Places, everybody. Hurry! Act natural. Folks: Hi, Sally. Sally: All right, what's goin' on? Mater: Ladies and gentlecars, please welcome the neeewww Lightning McQueen! McQueen: What do you think? Radiator Springs looks pretty good on me. Sally: I'll say. Rrr. Ka-chow. You're gonna fit right in in California. Oh my goodness. It looks like you've helped everybody in town. McQueen: Yeah, everybody except one. Hey, is it getting dark out? Lizzie: What? What'd he say? McQueen: Let me say that again. Is it getting dark out? Lizzie: Now, what was I supposed to do after that? Song Sally: They fixed their neon. Flo: Low and slow? Ramone: Oh, yeah, baby! McQueen: Just like in its heyday, right? Sally: It's even better than I pictured it. Thank you. McQueen: Shall we cruise? Lizzie: Oh, thank you, dear. I'd love to! McQueen: No,no,no. Sally: Lizzie! Lizzie: I remember when Stanley first asked me to take a drive with him. Mater: Hey, Miss sally. May I have this cruise? Sally: Of course, Mater. Sheriff: A,a,ah! Lizzie: ...and again and I said, "No," and he asked me again, and I said, "No." But, oh, he was a persistent little burger for a two-cylinder. Finally I said, "All right, one little drive." Mater: Hahaha. McQueen: Hey! Sally: Thanks, Mater. Mater: Good evenin', you two. Lizzie: Oh, Stanley, I wish you could see this. Flo: Is that what I think it is? Sally: Oh, I don't know, Flo. I haven't had a chance to find out. But I am going to find out. Hello. Flo: Not that. That. Sally: Huh. Customers? Flo: Customers, everybody! And a lot of 'em! You know what to do. Just like we rehearsed. Mater: It's the ghostlight! Helicopter: We have found McQueen. We have found McQueen! Cameramen: McQueen, over here! McQueen: Aaa, wait, excuse me. Cameramen: Is it true you've been in rehab? Cameramen: Did you have a nervous breakdown, McQueen. McQueen: I'm sorry, what? Cameramen: McQueen's wearing whitewalls! Cameramen: Are the tires you wearing are turning balding? Sally: Stickers, McQueen! Cameramen: Was Lightning McQueen your prisoner? Mater: Shoot, no! We're best buds! I ain't braggin' or nothin', but I was in charge of huntin' him down if he tried to escape. McQueen: Sally, Sally! Kori: McQueen! Will you still race for the Piston Cup? Sally: Stickers? McQueen: Sally! Cameramen: Come on, give us some bolt! Mack: You're here! Thank the manufacturer! You're alive! McQueen: Mack? Mack: You're here! I can't belive it! Oh, hoho. You are a sight for some headlights! I'm so sorry I lost you, boss. I'll make it up to you! McQueen: Mack, I, I can't belive you're here. Harv: Is that the world's fastest racing machine? McQueen: Is that Harv? Mack: Yeah. He's in the back. Cameramen: Show us the bolt, McQueen! Mack: Get back, you oil-thirsty parasites! Cameramen: Hey, where's the old McQueen? Mack: Actually, this is my good side here. Cameramen: Show us the bolt! McQueen: Harv! Harv! Cameramen: Give us the bolt! McQueen: Harv? Cameramen: Come on! Harv: Kid, I'm over here! McQueen: How you doin', buddy? Harv: My star client disappears off the face of the earth! How do you think I'm doing? McQueen: Harv, I can explain. Harv: I'm doing great! You're everywhere, baby! Radio, TV, the papers! You can't buy this kind of publicity! What do you need me for? That's just a figure of speech, by the way. You signed a contract. Where are you? I can't even find you on my GPS. McQueen: I'm in this little town called Radiator Springs. You know Route 66? It's still here! Harv: Yeah, that's great, kid. Playtime is over, pal. While the world's been trying to find you, Dinoco has had no one to woo. Who are they gonna woo? McQueen: Chick! Harv: Bingo. In fact, check out what's on the plasma right now. Cameramen: Show us the thunder! Chick: You want thunder? You want thunder? Ka-chicka, ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! McQueen: Hey, that's my bit! Harv: You've gotta get to Cali, pronto! Just get out of Radiation Stinks now, or Dinoco is history, you hear me? McQueen: Just give me a second here, Harv. Harv: No,no,no, wait. Where are goin'. Get in the trailer, baby. Kid! You want, you want a bigger trailer? McQueen: Sally, I...I want you to... Look, I wish...Ahhhh. Sally: Thank you. Thanks for everything. McQueen: Ah. Haha. It just a road. Sally: No. It was much more than that. Mack: Hey, kid! We gotta go. Harv's goin' crazy! He's gonna have me fired if I don't get you in the truck right now! McQueen: Mack, just... hold it for... Sally: You should go. McQueen: I know, but... Sally: Good luck in California. I hope you find what you're looking for. Cameramen: McQueen, come on! McQueen: Sally! Cameramen: Show us the bolt, McQueen! The bolt! Hey, Lightning, show us the bolt! Cameramen: Where's the old McQueen? Harv: Come on, get in the trailer. That's it. That's right kid, let's go! You're a big shining star. You're a superstar. You don't belong there, anyway. McQueen: Whoa... Wait...Whoa,whoa,wait,wait! Cameramen: Hey, guys! McQueen's leavin' in the truck! Kori: Hey, are you Doc Hudson? Doc: Yeah. Kori: Thanks for the call. Sally: You called them? Doc: It's best for everyone, Sally. Sally: Best for everyone, or best for you? Mater: I didn't get to say goodbye to him. Bob: Hello, race fans, and welcome to what has become, quite simply, the biggest event in the history of racing. A three way battle for the Piston Cup! Darrell: There's a crowd of nearly 200,000 cars here at the Los Angeles International Speedway. Tickets to this race are hotter than a black leather seat on a hot summer day! Bob: The King, Chick Hicks and Lightning McQueen in a 200 laps, winner-takes-all, tiebreaker race. Darrell: You know I got a lotta miles on me, but let me tell you somethin' buddy. I never thought I'd see anything like this. Wow! Man. This is exciting! Bob: In fact, the country has almost shut down, to watch what many experts are calling "the race of the century." Junior: Hey, King! Good luck in your last race. You've sure been an inspiration to me. The King: Thanks, Junior. Appreciate it. Dear: Hey, be careful out there, OK? The King: Yeah, mam. Mia: He's hot. Chick: Wanna know the forecast? I'll give you the forecast. A 100 percent chance of thunder! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Say it with me! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Security: Hey, you! No admittance without a garage pass. Fred: Oh, it's OK. Lightning McQueen knows me! Andretti: Hey, Marco, it's a beautiful day for a race, isn't it? Security: Absolutely, Mr. Andretti. Andretti: And good morning to you, Fred. Fred: Mario Andretti he knows my name! You gotta let me in now! Security: Sorry, pal. McQueen: OK, here we go. Focus. Speed. I am speed. Victory, one winner, two losers. Speed. Speed. Speed. Speed... Mack: Hey, Lightnin'! You ready? McQueen: Yeah, yeah, yeah! I'm...I'm ready. McQueen: Mack, thanks for being my pit crew today. Mack: Nahh. Don't worry about it, kid. It's the least I could do. After all, "Gas Can" is my middle name. McQueen: It is? Mack: Nahh, not really. Small aeroplane: A. O. TV Crew: Nelson! Zoom in. Ready, 16? Take 16. Bob: And there he is, Lightning McQueen! Missing all week, and then he turns up in the middle of nowhere! In a little town called Radiator Springs. Darrell: Wearin' whitewall tires, of all things. Chick: Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Hahaha. Hey, where you been? I've been kinda lonely. Nobody to hang out with. I mean, except the Dinoco folks. Ohhh and the twins. Of course. You know the twins the one that used to be your fans, but now they're my fans. Anyway, listen to what the twins think... McQueen: Ahh. Shoot! Fans: Boogity, boogity, boogity, boys! Let's go racin'! Dear: Come on, you can do it! Tex: Come on kid, make us proud, boy! Bob: Fifty laps down, and The King is still holding a slim lead. Darrell: Hey, McQueen's got a run on him! He's lookin' to the inside! Ohh! Chick slammed the door on him! Bob: Chick's not making it easy on him today. Darrell: Oh, man, he lost so much momentum, and now he's gonna have to chase him back down! Bob: Ohhh, McQueen spins out in the infield! Chick: Hahaha! Just me and the old man, fellas. McQueen just doesn't have it today. Mack: Hey, kid, are you all right? McQueen: I don't know, Mack. I..I... I don't think I... Doc: I didn't come all this way to see you quit. McQueen: Doc? Guys: Yey.. Hahaha. McQueen: Guys, you're here! I can't believe this! Doc: I knew you needed a crew chief, but I didn't know it was this bad. McQueen: I thought you said you'd never come back. Doc: Well, I really didn't have a choice. Mater didn't get to say goodbye. Mater: Goodbye!! Okay, I'm good. McQueen: Hahaha! Doc: All right, if you can drive as good as you fix a road, then you can win this race with you eyes shut. Now, get back out there! Hot snot, we are back in business! Guido! Luigi! You're goin' up against professional pit crews boys, you're gonna have to be fast. Luigi: They will not know what bit them! Doc: Kid, you can beat these guys. Find a groove that works for you and get that lap back. Chick's Crew: Is that? Chick's Crew: Oh, wow. That's him! TV Crew: Is that...? That's the Hudson Hornet! Bob, Darrell! The Hudson Hornet's back! Bob: Darrell, it appears McQueen has got himself a pit crew. And look who he has for a crew chief! Fans: Wow... Look, man. It's the Hudson Hornet! Biggest fan: Whoa!! Fans: Well, dip me in axle grease and call me Slick! It surely is. Biggest fan: Hahahahaha! Bob: Wow, this is history in the making. Nobody has seen the racing legend in over 50 years! Lizzie: Hey, Doc! Come look at the fellow on the radio. He looks just like you. Bob: McQueen passes them on the inside! Darrell: But he's still nearly a lap fail. Bob: Can he catch up to them with only 60 laps to go? Doc: You're goin' great, kid. Just keep your head on. Guido: Vai! Vai! Vai,vai! Chick's crew: Hey, shrimpie, where did McQueen find you, huh? Those round things are called tires, and they go under the car! All Chick's Crew: Hahahahaha!!! Guido: Con chi credi di parlare? Ma, con chi stai parlando? Luigi: No! No, no! You'll have your chance. You will have your chance. Chick: Oh, kid's just tryin' to be a hero, huh? Well, what do you think of this? Yeah, that's it kid. Whats?? Mater: Whoa! Git-R-done! Hahaha! I taught him that. Ka-chow! Chick Crew: Auuww! Bob: What a move by McQueen! He's caught up to the leaders. Darrell: Oh, yeah. This is what it's all about. A three-way battle for the lead, with ten to go. Tex: Hahaha! Look at that boy go out there! Chick: No, you don't. McQueen: Doc, I'm flat! I'm flat! Doc: Can you get back to the pits? McQueen: Yeah, yeah. I think so. Doc: Hey, got a yellow. Bring it in. Don't tear yourself up, kid. Mack: We gotta get him back out there fast or we're gonna be a lap down, and we'll never win this race! Doc: Guido! It's time. Chick Crew: Hey, tiny, you gonna clean his windshield? Hahaha! Darrell: I don't believe it! Bob: That was the fastest pit stop I've ever seen! Darrell: It was a great stop, but he's still gotta beat that pace car out! Bob: It's gonna be close. Mater: Yeah!! Biggest Fan: Yeah, baby!! Fans: Yeah... Hahaha! Darrell: Yeah!! He's back in the race! Guido: Peet stop. Luigi: Guido, you did it! Mater: Way to go, Guido! Ramone: Yeah!! Bob: This is it. We're heading into the final lap and McQueen is right behind the leaders. What a comeback! Darrell: A hundred and ninety-nine laps, and, baby, it all comes down to this! Doc: This is it, kiddo. You've got four turns left. One at a time. Drive it in deep and hope it sticks. Go! Chick: We'll see about that! Bob: McQueen's going inside! Bob: Chick and The King are loose! Darrell: I think McQueen is out of the race! Darrell: McQueen saved it! Bob: He's back on the track! Doc: Float like a Cadillac... McQueen: Sting like a Beemer! Biggest Fan: Ka-chow, ka-chow, ka-chow! Fans: Wooowww! Folks: Yeeehaaaa! Hahaha. Darrell: Lightning McQueen is gonna win the Piston Cup! Sally: Come on! You got it! You got it, Stickers! Chick: I am not comin' in behind you again, old man. Dear: Oh, no! Chick: Yeah... Woooww! I won, baby! Yeah! Oh, yeah! Flo: What's he up to, Doc? The King: What are you doin', kid? McQueen: I think The King should finish his last race. The King: You just gave up the Piston Cup, you know that? McQueen: Ahhh. This grumpy old racecar I know once told me somethin'. It's just an empty cup. Bob: Darrell, is pushing on the last lap legal? Darrell: Hey, man. He's not really pushin' him. He's just givin' him a little bump draft. Chick: Whoaa.. Hohooo!! Hey. What? What's goin' on? Fan: That's what I call racin' right there. Tex: Hahaha! Luigi: Bravo il mio amico! Mater: Way to go, buddy! Filmore: There's a lotta love out there, you know, man? Sarge: Don't embarrass me, Filmore. Lizzie: That's my hot rod. Chick: Come on, baby, bring it out! Bring out the Piston Cup! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Yeah! Now, that's what I'm talkin' about! Hey, how come I'm the only one celebrating is me, huh? Where are the girls? Bring on the confetti! Auuww! Auuww! Easy with the confetti. What's goin' on? Come on, snap some pictures. I gotta go sign my deal with Dinoco! Ka-chicka! Say it with me. Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Cameramen: Booo! Mia & Tia: Booo! Chick: What's wrong with everybody? Where's the happiness? Hey! This is the start of the Chick era! Dear: Thanks, Lightnin'. McQueen: You're welcome. Fan: Way to go, King! Fan: You're still the car! Biggest Fan: You're The King! Yeah! Rust-eze Folks: Yeah! Hahahaha! Mack: Wahh! Hoo! Rust-eze Car: You make us proud, kid! Mack: Congrats on the loss, me bucko! Doc: You got a lotta of stuff, kid. McQueen: Thanks, Doc. Tex: Hey, Lightnin'. How 'bout comin' over here and talk to me a minute? Son, that was some real racin' out there. How'd you like to become the new face of Dinoco? McQueen: But I didn't win. Tex: Lightnin', there's a whole lot more to racin' than just winnin'. Rust-eze Van: He was so rusty, when he drove down the street. Hahaha. Buzzards used to circle the car! Folks: Hahahaha. McQueen: Thank, you, Mr. Tex, but...but these Rust-eze guys over there gave me my big break. I'm gonna stick with them. Tex: Well, I sure can respect that. Still, you know, if there's ever anything I can do for you, just let me know. McQueen: I sure appreciate that. Thank you. Actually, there is one thing. Mater: Whoah! Hoo! Aaaa! Hey look at me! I'm flyin', by golly! Whoahh! Hoo! I'm happier than a tornado in a trailer park! Luigi: I think it's about-a time we redecorate. Michael Schumacker: Chow! Hi, Lightning McQueen told me this was the best place in the world to get tires. How 'bout setting me and my friends up with three or four sets each? Luigi: Huh. Guido! There is a real Michael Schumacker Ferrari in my store. A real Ferrari! Punch me, Guido. Punch me in the face. This is the most glorious day of my life. Michael Schumacker: Wow. Spero che il tuo amico si riprenda. Mi dicono che siete fantastici. Sally: Uh..huh!. Hahaha. Just passin' through? McQueen: Actually, I thought I'd stop and stay awhile. I hear this place is back on the map. Sally: It is? McQueen: Yeah, there's some rumor floating around that some hotshot Piston Cup racecar is setting up his big racing headquarters here. Sally: Really? Well, there goes the town. McQueen: You know, I really missed you, Sally. Sally: Well, I create feelings in others they themselves don't understand and, blah, blah, blah, blah. McQueen: Hahaha. Mater: McQueen and Sally parked beneath the tree, K-i-s-s...i-n-t! McQueen: Great timing, Mater! Mater: Hep-non, hip-hep, hi-li-lilly! Weeeee!! McQueen: He's my best friend. What're you gonna do? Sally: So, Stickers, last one to Flo's buys? McQueen: I don't know. Why don't we just take a drive? Sally: Mmm. Nahh. McQueen: Yeah! Ka-chow! Mater: Yeeeehoooo!!!!!

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